Making boys into men? Or the golden rule?

[Eamonn]

OK maybe I'm splitting hairs?

Still I have never liked this "We make men out of boys" thing.

First off I don't think the girls in the Sea Scout Ship I serve want to be men!!

 

I'm unsure what this "Man" thing is all about?

I'm a very different man than my father was.

His role in our family was that of the bread winner. My Mother played her part by taking care of the home and the kids.

His culinary expertise ended with making a pot of tea.

He never ever changed a diaper or fed a baby.

Maybe I'm not a "Real Man" because I really dislike guns? I can't stand violence ? I get watery eyes with sad movies?

Maybe my thinking magazines like Playboy and Penthouse are degrading to women, makes me less of a real man?

Could it be that in business I have gone out of my way to be fair and not cheat or swindle people that I'm not a good business man?

 

I'm happy for kids to be kids.

Sure I want to give them the tools that will be of use when they go out into the real world.

But I enjoy kids being kids and I'm honored that they allow me to share that time with them.

Seeing a couple of Lads building a fort in the woods, making snow angels, kicking up fallen leaves.The sheer joy of just being a kid is not something to rush.

I'm happy to tap into their imagination as a way of getting the scouting message over.

I know at times I get carried away with quoting the Vision and Mission (which does refer to the Scout Oath and Law)

Still I much prefer the idea that we are helping the young people we serve understand the Golden Rule, than some macho idea.

I think I'll know that I have done a good job with the young people I serve, when they not only understand the Golden Rule, but also understand that the Golden Rule is of no use to them whatever, unless they understand it is their move.

Ea.

(Ask anyone who has attended Wood Badge this century and they will tell you what the Golden Rule is.)

 

 

[ajmako]

Ea.

I don't think you're splitting hairs (or should that be "splitting heirs"). As I remember it--I don't have the entire contents of B-P's writings on Scouting memorizied--Scouting isn't about making men out of boys, it's about helping boys become the right sort of men. That can be made gender neutral--helping young people become the right sort of adults.

 

To me, the distinction is important. Lots of activities can turn a child into an adult, but not all activities result in the right sort of adult. What we, as adults, do in Scouting should be focused on building from within, not imposing from without.

 

[GernBlansten]

During our return trip from the Grand Canyon this spring, while towing our tiny troop trailer full of backpacks, and a truck full of sleeping scouts through Monument Valley, got to thinking about a slogan to put on it. It hit me.

"Creating lifelong memories, one adventure at a time."

[Gunny2862]

You don't have to be a rough tough Ramboesque creation of myth to be a man. And I don't think that's what Scouting is about.

 

But I also don't think that someone else's lack of control over their habits should cause one to become upset - offended, perhaps; take note of, sure; but if you wear your emotions on your sleeve people will take advantage of that.

 

A lot of the things boys do as boys is about finding out the acceptable limits of behavior. Our reactions will tell them what we really think long before they hear our words.

 

I think Scouting is a safe place for the boys to experiment. The right sort of leadership will "sort out" the boys choices in behavior. But simply putting a Pollyannish view of boys out there and completely prohibiting it will really only lead to it being done outside of scouting and thus outside of a framework we have influence in.

 

Unless there is a different Golden Rule out there, I'm going to assume you mean "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." My personal problem with this is that it can still be interpreted as a self serving proverb and not affect the character of the kid.