What I *didn't* say...

[AnneinMpls]

"Hands off the freaking can opener!!!"

 

(Terminology variance follows as this is GSUSA, not BSA)

 

My asst. leader was sitting with the dolphin patrol as usual (her daughter is in the dolphin patrol).

Dolphins and Tigers were to make vagabond stoves. I handed each of the patrol leaders a can opener with the reminder that they should ensure that each girl in their patrol gets a chance to help make a stove.

I turn around.

I turn back.

My asst. leader has the can opener in her hand.

Arrrrrrrrgh.

 

I hand a meal plan form to each patrol leader. I field questions from other patrols as they come up (how many green peppers should we buy if ...? etc.) At the end of the meeting I ask patrol leaders if they want to turn in their meal plans to me or keep them. Cougar patrol leader elects to keep theirs. Tiger patrol leader hands hers to me. My asst. leader hands the dolphin meal plan to me. We've run late. I don't get a chance to look over the meal plans until this morning.

The Dolphin patrol's meal plan is neatly & completely handwritten.....by my asst. leader.

ARRRRRRRGH.

 

Thank you for allowing me to vent.

 

Do I need to make a rule that she does not physically sit with her daughter's patrol???

[CA_Scouter]

OK, the easy comment is maybe you didn't say 'let the girls do it themselves', though I'm sure you probably did, eh? If so, it needs to be restated in some way that sinks in to that parent.

 

Perhaps you can assign her a special task or something that will keep her from interfering.

 

Another suggestion, in our scout troop, the ASM's are assigned a patrol that they act as advisor to, but we don't assign an ASM to a patrol in which their son is a member. I've found that parents are less likely to interfere with someone else's child.

 

My $0.02.

 

 

 

 

[funscout]

After reminding your Asst. Leader that the girls need to do the activities, not the adults, maybe you could ask her to help you get a feel for which girls are showing good leadership, teamwork, etc. You could give her a clipboard, pen and chart, and give her the assignment to observe the girls, but not to interfere, because you want to see what the girls can do on their own. Maybe this would help her realize what they CAN do, and will help remind her that she shouldn't be doing the work for them.

[flmomscoutw3]

Well you might want to say it next time (but maybe in a softer voice without the steam coming from your ears). It is really hard for some adults to step back and they DO NOT UNDERSTAND HINTS. If you don't say what you actually mean she may not get it. CA_Scouter may have a good idea by switching her to be the advisor of another patrol. I would say that it has to be a patrol that will not allow her to take over. I am the advisor of one of my boys patrols, but he tells me to sit down. I have to sit on my hands (I can't talk without them they tell me). It really makes me proud to see what my son can do, how the other boys listen to him and follow his lead. I stay out of the picture as much as possible, just try to observe so we can discuss things on the way home. It does take my thinking about not interferring, continually thou and reminders from the scouts in the patrol on occasion. If she insists on staying with her daughter's patrol speak to her and come up with some sort of code that you can use to remind her. You don't want to be saying anything in front of the girls. It is hard to keep the youth in charge when we feel that we can do it better and quicker. With our Troop there are a few of the adults that need to hear "Boy Lead means the boys are in charge" from time to time. Good Luck,

YiS

 

[SSScout]

Everytime I see or hear an episode like this (someone can't WAIT for our boys to make things/decisions/discussions HAPPEN....because I can do it faster/easier/more appropriately...) I am reminded of the classic routine by Bob and Ray, "The Slow Talkers of America". Find it, look it up, listen to it, learn from it!

"...ofAMERICA!!"

 

LoL YiS