We need PEACE

[chaoman45]

Sparing the details, I'll just say some recent incidences are now starting to boil over. Two sides, two different adult leadership ideologies, etc. Somehow, a lot of blame goes to our CC, who is known for "rubbing people the wrong way." I know he does. I'll admit to it, too. But a committee member who I consider a friend resigned in protest. Some of the volunteers won't help at activities anymore due to the divisive nature of the situation.

 

I don't hate any of the people who are protesting, not even dislike. We just have different perspectives of how a troop should run, the extent of which to include adults, et al. And it's apparently reached borderline ragequit. Can't/won't give specifics, because all I need to know is how you would diffuse a **** storm. And how do you do it with people that may strongly disagree with each other.

[Eagle732]

My COR, CC and myself (SM) are all in agreement on one thing. Adults (registered members or not) are expected to live up to the Scout Oath and Law. Those that don't are shown the door.

 

If the issue is program related what do the boys and the SM want? And if other adults want a change is someone else prepared to take the SM job? We only appoint SM and ASMs for a one year term. That stops a lot of complaining,(This message has been edited by Eagle732)

[qwazse]

Well Chao, you got my prayers, cause some of this is will take a miracle. I lost track if you are COR, SM, or UC. Each will take on a different slice of what I'm about to write. Either way, this is how things usually pan out ...

 

Has CC taken Woodbadge? Ask how his "Game of Life" went. Throwing down axes is not a viable long term strategy.

Sometimes a person like this is a little more married to scouting than he should be. If he has a wife, you may want to very carefully talk to her about it. If the marriage is strong, she'll help you reign him in. If that's the center of the storm, step away before you're in over your head. Help them to think of the name of a counselor they both trust.

 

Will any of those volunteers pull together to start their own unit? Sometimes the best way to peace is the "Paul and Barnabas" solution. Let the team take on different missions, maybe some of their "rage quit" isn't just about the CC and they need to learn the hard way that their attitudes also need adjusting. The down side is you wind up dividing boys just so adults can learn "no matter where you go, there you are."

 

Teach your unit leader this phrase: "I'm not about to be bothered by the burrs up someone else's butt -- especially yours." It's to be used sparingly, but everyone should know it was said. SMs and Advisors who get bogged down in this interpersonal muck will miss out on the needs of the youth. Respect whoever is doing work. Pretend to listen to whoever is blowing smoke.

 

Finally, if any of this is disagreement in following something spelled out in Guide to Safe Scouting, follow the G2SS.

[Eagle92]

I can sympathize. We have one key leader, one who has actually held the pack together through some difficult times, be a bit abrasive. Some folks don't want to work with the person, and I have a feelign we have lost a family or two that I may not have known about. I do know we may have lost one family, one of my former Cubs, over some comments the leader made. The thing that may keep the family in is that the leader is moving up with the son into Boy Scouts soon. Nothing I've done has helped when I've talked to them.

 

I think part of the tactlessness can be attributed to the fact that they are doing a heck of a lot more than the job description. This stems from the situation they inherited. To call it a charlie foxtrot is an understatement, and I know for a fact we lost a few families over the situation and the I have a feelig the troop may lose some potential scouts as the problem moved to them. But the Cub Leader has been the glue for our pack, and has held us together and kept us going.

[chaoman45]

qwazse - I'm ASM. The CC and I have taken Wood Badge, though I think he did only the 20th Century one. Another troop split is actually a suspicion. Who knows. The SM can be hard to read, only because he prefers to not start or contribute to confrontations. I once did something I knew he really did not like. Never said a word about it until someone else did. That was a couple years ago, but there is a pattern of behaviour.

 

Each side has basically determined the other side "has been a great help, BUT..." As in, they contribute a lot, yet cause a lot of problems, too, if that makes sense. Nothing really about G2SS.

 

E92 - It's sad. My friend and another are Eagle Scouts. I'm an Eagle Scout. We aren't getting along very well, I feel. Then again, even Scouting's founders had huge eruptive fights about administration of a programme.

[frankpalazzi]

Hopefully your COR is active/involved with your troop. You might want to consult with him on this. From what you've written, it appears that one "faction" suffers from a lack of training or outdated training. (And I don't mean to say 20th Century Wood Badge is "outdated"--the basics are still there)

 

Your COR would be well within his rights to require all adults have updated training pertaining to their specific position (or better!--imposing a set of requirements) before recharter. No training, no registration. This will either discourage your P.I.T.A.-type adults, or get everyone on the same page. Either way, things will improve.

 

Wisdom from my old SM: "Always go by the book, and you can never be called out."

[Second Class]

So whose troop is it? What I mean with this question is, are the disgruntled people trying to change the statis quo? Didn't they join the troop knowing how it ran? Are they trying to fulment a coup? If that's the case, they should go their own way and start their own troop. It's much harder than they think.

 

As far as the scoutmaster being tight lipped, I see that as a good thing. Less red meat for others to chew on.

 

If the noise makers don't want to leave, they should man up and get with the program. It's not about them. It's about putting on a good program for the youth.

 

The committee chairman doesn't have to allow votes on any matter. It can be a directive type of management. The CC and committe are there to support the program delivery of the Scoutmaster.

 

That said, it works best when the COR, CC and SM all share a common vision. Without that, it can get bumpy. But program should not start with the committee.

 

Golden rule rules.

[Backroads]

My crew works in tandem with a Scout troop, and we recently had some bad blood between leadership... sounds like similar emotions are involved.

 

My advice: get a moderator. You have all these people emotionally attached to what they want.

[frankpalazzi]

A Unit Commissioner (assuming you have one) can be an excellent moderator. Getting units like this "back on track" is part of their job!

[acco40]

20th Century Wood Badge? Please, tell me what that is all about.

 

 

[qwazse]

Specifically, Acco, c45 can have a sit-down with his CC and say that the adults are in a "storming" stage and maybe slipping into "forming", and of they don't change their abrasive behavior quickly, it will be reforming -- maybe into two separate teams. In fact as long as he's freinds with everyone he should do his best to respect everyone while nudging them all to behave with a little more loyalty or courtesy.

 

I've done the ASM gig for 10 years now (not counting that stint after high school a few decades ago). The first three, no problem. I could be everybody's buddy. Then someone handed me a crew advisor's patch and like Backroads hinted at, I became an "instant lightning rod" for the drama generators.

 

It took folks a few years for the backbiters to realize that as far as the troop was concerned, I was there to assist the SM, and when it came to the crew's agenda, my chain would not be yanked unless you were willing to actually hike or camp or ski with us. Leave it that some people were slower leader's than others.

 

Did this hurt the kids? Yes a little. They got the impression that some adults loved them a little less than they actually did. A darn shame really.

[acco40]

qwazse - forgive me, I'm prone to sarcasm. There is no 20th Century Wood Badge, but there is a 21st Century Wood Badge or more correctly, Wood Badge for the 21st Century.

 

Yeah, I think I may have wore out my welcome with some of the adults that always were telling me, the Scoutmaster, how to run things - the same folks that never went on any outings nor attended a PLC meeting. I'd usually politely listen and then ignore 99% of their input.