Scoutfish Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 When I was 14, I "helped" spray paint a water tower. By "helped" I was there. I didn't paint on anything. Matter of fact, I didn't even scale the fence like trhe other two did. But I was there, I was aware, and I still hung out with my two friends. When I was 18 to 20 years old...I smoked my fair share of weed. I probably met my lifetime quota of consumed beer too in that time. I got pulled over for a random vehicle check and got caught with one joint when I was 20. I didn't get completely arrested, but I was taken to trhe policr station. At that point, I chnged things around. To behonest, since I did not go to court, I don't know if there is a record of any kind. I doubt there is, but I have no issue telling people what happened. First of all, who I was when I was 18 or 20 years old is not remotely close to who I am now. Secondly, I was young, immature and knew everything back then. So, my point is this: While I wouldn't advertise what you did in the past, I would not hide it in any way to the leadership or committee of the pack. Be up front, be honest and relax. If those in charge do not want you in a leadership postion now, they can and will still let you help out in all kinds of other ways. That leads to you giving a demo of what you can do, which will probably lead to being a DL...assuming they don't accept you to start with. I'd hope the COR, and committe are realsisticly attuned with the real world. The you, that you are now is not the you, that you were 18 years ago. Good Luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disappointed Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 I opened a discussion recently under a different title but with this issue. My grandson earned Eagle with Troop (I have been his 'Scouting parent' since Tiger as Cub Committee and Troop Committee. He made several mistakes and has a record. When our Eagles turn 18, our Troop will register them for 1 year as an adult, to encourage them and allowing a chance to see if they are interested. All paperwork, YPT, etc is required or course. My grandson filled his out, he had stayed active for a year and a half after earning Eagle. Now he hoped to become a recognized adult. Nothing was ever heard from Council that his application was being rejected, so he continued working with the Troop. The SM, CC, COR all knew him, knew of his problems and left it up to Council to say NO. But Council never did. Life was good for the Troop. Then one day, as advancement chairperson, I made a parent angry. About 4 months later, our CO and all parents (but me) received an extremely ugly e mail, exaggerating the details (all public knowledge) about my grandson's problems, accusing him of drug use on a campout, among other things. Results so far? My grandson is no longer allowed to associate with young men he has known for several years in the Troop and he will go on and deal with his leagal issues; the CO pastor 'fired' me, for having the poor judgment to allow my grandson to be around the Troop he spent 8 years growing up in, so I can no longer be around boys I have watched grow to young men and help a Troop that means a lot to my family. I wish you the very best of luck in your pursuit of adult leadership and hope someday, someone will remember the mistakes 'they' made and that Scouting may have made a big difference in the kinds of mistakes boys make today. So if you have legal issues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeattlePioneer Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 Hello Disappointed, Yep, that can happen. It's the usual occurrence that facts about what happened in an incident are in dispute, even among people who observed what happened. It sounds like your son made mistakes that could have gotten him kicked out of Scouting, and probably charged criminally. That doesn't appear to be in dispute either. The real decision was made by the Institutional Head --- the Church Pastor. He chose to treat this as a potential threat to youth in the Troop, and he acted accordingly to protect them. I understand that you feel he didn't act charitably, and perhaps that's true. But especially if he wasn't well acquainted with your son and the facts and history of this incident, perhaps his actions were reasonable, even courageous. The easiest thing to do is to ignore problems and hope they will go away. Sometimes they do, sometimes they get a lot worse. It sounds like the Pastor didn't have the issue with your son explained to him, and probably felt blindsided when it exploded on him. I wouldn't be at all surprised if in your unhappiness and anger you want to just put this situation behind you. Another alternative would be to wait a few months and to ask the Scoutmaster, Committee Chair or other troop leaders to ask to put you and your son back as registered pack leaders. You could both fill out adult leader applications and the Pastor would have another opportunity to decide to appoint you as unit leaders. One of the reasons why bad behavior is bad is because it can harm a lot of people in unexpected ways. The root cause of the problem here was the bad behavior of your son, not the Pastor and not even the angry parent. Your son made himself vulnerable to this kind of thing, and made you vulnerable too. When we make mistakes, we hope for charity from all and malice towards none. But it doesn't always work that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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