You have got to be kidding: Overprotective Stories

[83Eagle]

Yeah, my rubber playground example probably wasn't the best one. After all we didn't have bike helmets (or common usage of seat belts) when I was a kid either but now I wouldn't think about going out without one.

 

My thinking was just that we try to wrap kids in bubble wrap before they leave the house rather than letting them suffer some bumps and bruises and actually learn consequences of poor decisions.

 

Anyhoo, about the bus situation, out here in rural flyover country the bus slows down a bit but if there isn't anyone at the end of the driveway--or running frantically down it--ZOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!

 

In fact, I remember the day well. After harping on our daughter day after day--"get ready, watch for the bus, are you ready, get out there, you're gonna miss it," yada yada yada. Finally made it clear that it was her responsibility, not ours, for her to get out there. To her credit she made it almost a week before...ZOOOOOMMMMM!!! That was over three years ago and she hasn't missed it since...(This message has been edited by 83eagle)

[Stosh]

Better yet, forward your phone to the Camp Office. They'll straighten her out in no time at all.

 

In 15 years of camping at summer camp I have never had a parent call to check up on their child. I let them know the Camp Office phone is for emergencies only and then I leave the cell phone at home. Works great.

 

Stosh

[Gunny2862]

Yeah, I like the forwarding to the camp office idea in principle, but in action it plays out like this.

 

Mom calls, my phone forwards, Camp phone forwards, Camp director picks up, conversation, Camp director rides golf Cart to my tent, unhappy conversation. Bottom line; I get straightened out, not Mom.

[infoscouter]

The schools around here (many of them 1960's-early 70's vintage buildings) have all had their parking lots redesigned to separate the parent pick-up/drop-off area from the bus loading area. There was too much trouble with parents parking in the bus area. At about the same time the school district raised the bus riding radius from one mile to two miles for financial reasons. If you lived in the two mile radius, but outside the one mile radius, you could pay $200 for bus transportation.

 

I have to admit that I have sat in the car with my son waiting for the bus in the winter. Special education transportation rules require hand-to-hand or eye-to-eye transfer of students from the parent to the bus driver and back again. The bus drivers sometimes find it difficult to get down our narrow driveway, and prefer to pick up at the end of the driveway.

 

In the rural areas around my home town, and in the farther reaches of our county, you will find variations of this structure: http://www.oregontimberwerks.com/rural_school_bus_stop_waiting_shelter.htm (usually not so deluxe). Kids walk down the driveway and wait in the shelter for the bus to pick them up. Sometimes more than one family will share the construction costs.

[OldGreyEagle]

Just a thought on snow and clean streets. The streets around the schools can be plowed rather quickly, where the kids have to stand pre and post boarding can depend a lot on how the school distrct employees clear the sidewalks and if they can't get to work because no one but plows are allowed on the streets, then a second snow day, even though the streets are clear can occur.

 

Least wise thats what I get told

 

Speaking of over protective, in the extended family I have a case that I want to describe, I am not sure anyone has come close as yet

 

Mother has a baby, she was a bit of an alcoholic and drug user while pregnant and now is guilty as heck about what she did to the boy. Yes, the boy has some issues, his speach is at times incomprehensible and lacks strength and coordination in hand and fingers. He is ADD and severely disorganized. Some other issues remain but this is enough for her.

 

He is 12 now, his mother still brushes him teeth for him as he can't do it "good enough" for her. His mother still wipes his butt after using the toilet because he can't so it to her satisfaction. One wonders what he does at school, but thats the way it is when he is at home. His parents keep him away from other kids because they "might" tease him so as a result he acts and relates to adults as an equal, which freaks me out totally.

His mother buttons his shirts and pants, mostly he wears sweatpants and sweat shirts

 

He sits in his room and plays video games all day and and in school he daydreams about playing video games. Yeah, I know, how can he be too uncoordinated to tie his shoes but he scores quite well in Call of Duty? No idea here

 

its a train wreck waiting to happen but what can be done when parents enable the situation?

[raisinemright]

I've got two comments. I used to take a city bus to school. One winter day, I missed the last one, so, I walked 7 miles to school. Missed the first two classes but I showed up. No big deal.

 

As far as overprotectives, we were going on a winter camp once and one of the mom's who's son and husband were both going asked at what point Scouts cancels for dangerous weather. I laughed and told her that if you're prepared, five below zero isn't dangerous. She laughed, as I expected her to. I woke up at 4am and thought about going and checking on the scouts. Naaa, if they're cold, they'll come to me.

 

It was a memorable camp.

[skeptic]

Back around 1960 or so, we had two students that lived above Yucca Valley, Ca. in a spot called Pioneertown, an old movie set for B westerns. They would ride their horses down the canyon to Yucca and leave them corralled, catch the bus to high school in 29 Palms 35 miles away, and then ride them back up in the late afternoon. Guess they must have had an arrangement of some sort wherever they left the horses during the day; but, cannot hardly imagine that today.(This message has been edited by skeptic)

[moosetracker]

OGE, we had a scout 2 scouts like that. One supposably had no disabling conditions. But at 12 the uncle (who was also in the troop) took the boy for a week and was shocked at how much this boy expected him to do, from tieing shoes, to turning on shower, to helping him dress.. Because Mom did it.. The divorced mother (who was the sister-in-law) was trying to create a "mamma's boy".. She did find a guy she adventually married, this guy was helping to straighten ot the situation.

 

Another single mom had a boy with some slight disabilities, but the mother was again creating the dependency.. the troop leaders would ask the mother not stay at the meetings. If he even wanted to try, the mother was there telling him he was unable to do anything, he was not smart enough whatever to pull the slightest bit of confidence the leaders were trying to instill in him.. He normally sat as a bump on a log, and never engaged, unless you could pull him away from mom.. Even still the 1 1/2 hours were not long enough.. They did better if he went to a weekend event, but still not enough.. One of our trainers was specially trained to work with disabilities, she really started to make great progress. The mother then yanked him from the troop and took him to a different troop.

 

Don't know if that is over protective, or something else.

 

 

With scouts - How many have scouts who come in and you find out they have never done a single chore at home, and parents don't think they should.. Tell parents that scout should earn their troop dues by at least doing chores around the house.. Parents laugh at you like you have lost your mind. Do they have any skills with setting the table or cleaning the dishes or help with dinner.. Again the parents will laugh at you.. So when they grow up to own their own homes, will mommy come with them to take care of them? Or is it a plan they marry and have a wife that will take care of them as if they lived back before the 1950 era?

 

My son is marrying a girl.. He CAN cook, he was responsible to cook one meal a week back when we gave him an allowance. He has gotten lazy about it lately.. She can bake, but other wise can not cook.. I think between the both of them he is the one with training to clean, wash clothes, cook etc.. But truthfully I fear that they may live on Kraft Mac 'n cheese, in a messy house, unless his past training kicks in once he is out on his own.

[Stosh]

LOL! Reminds me of my upbringing. I have a sister that is a year older than me. She did all the laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. around the house. Well, one day she went off to college. Mom looked at me and simply said, "It's your turn!" Dang! I learned to cook, clean, do laundry, sew, and just about everything that Home Ec. didn't teach. When Mom and Dad broke up housekeeping, I got the sewing machine!!!! Last time I used it, I made patrol flags, the time before that I was making neckerchiefs.

 

To this day, I still say prayers of thanksgiving to my Mom! It was great. I know from anecdotal stories that this same process was repeated on my two younger brothers, both which complained like mad, but learned nonetheless.

 

Parents are doing their children a great disservice by not helping them grow up!

 

Stosh

[shortridge]

Camp director rides golf Cart to my tent...

 

And we're bellyaching about parents being soft?!? What's wrong with this picture?

[moosetracker]

Awwww... Shortridge... give the camp director a break, remember he is driving out at 4am in the morning, hasn't got out of his pj's or slippers, and hasn't had his morning cup of coffee..

[Eagle92]

At one of the camps I worked at, staffers were considered lazy for bringing a bike to camp. I would love to hear what they would say about the golf cart.

 

Then again at my current council's main camp golf carts are dereigeur for the CD, PD and a few other senior staff.I admit they can be handy for some things, i.e. transporting ceremony gear, lost camper, etc.

[Scoutfish]

Well,I can understand some of the aforementioned stuff.

 

 

Rain and cold weather? I see nothing wrong with getting wet or cold. Seems like kids today are not allowed to experience anything. I used to stand in mud puddles during the rain as a kid. Got fussed at for getting my clothes wet, but thats about it. Amazingly enough...I never got ring worm!

 

Washing hands after touching a leaf? Gonna over protect us to the point our bodies will have no natural immunity from even plain ole air!

 

But as far as carpooling kids with one parent...well, I completely understand why people don't ewant to do that. Let me tell you something that happened a month ago to my so.

 

A long time family freind who is great with kids ( practically one himself) and a former scout adult as well as adult volunteer - decided to take my son and nephew to a store that was "only" a 1/4mile down the road to get a milkshake.

 

Well, Mr.Family friend had his neices car seat in the front of his pickup as well as a surveying transit in the box on the seat too.

 

So he tells my son and nephew they can ride in the back of the truck, as long as they lay down and can't be seen and don't tell anybody.

 

Okay, here's the thing: The guy honestly thought that it would be no big deal and since he was soooo freaking careful, nothing would happen. What;'s trhe harm if mom and dad don't know right?

 

He never considered that another car could cross the line, be speeding or just a drunk driver could come along and hit him even though he was being REALLY careful.

 

So now, my wife had to handle it because if I did, I'd have been arrested!

 

So now we wonder how many other " no harm/ no foul ? moments have happened?

Is he a pedophile? Nah, absolutely not. Does he do stupid stuff? Apparently so!

 

 

But let me bring up another point while I'm at it:

 

You ever hear of a pedophile or abuser being arrested and all the neighbors say " Oh yeah...we always knew he was bad to the kids!" on the tv news?

 

Nope! You always hear the interveiwees saying how shocked they were because nobody ever would have thought that Mr. Freindly guy would do that sort of thing! We don't know what people might do in private. We only know what they do in front of us>

 

Look at the story that was posted a few weeks ago about the former SM. Not saying he abused the scouts, but you wouldn't have expected it from him based on everybody's past experience working with him.

 

So while I do think parents are nuts for locking kids indoors in a hermatically sealed super sanitized indoor playground, to play in their antibacterial, temperatured controlled protective catsuits........

 

I don't blame them for being the ones to pick up their own kids or driving them to school as opposed to standing next to a public hiway where a kidnapper could snatch you up and toss you in a van in less that 15 seconds!

[shortridge]

He never considered that another car could cross the line, be speeding or just a drunk driver could come along and hit him even though he was being REALLY careful.

 

I think this is also the basic reason why parents drop off and pick up their kids at the bus stop instead of having them walk, or why they want the kids to stay in the house instead of standing by the side of the road. All it takes is one split second for an inattentive / drunk / tired driver to veer a few feet over onto the shoulder and hit a waiting or walking kid.

 

Speaking only for myself, that's on my mind far more often than abduction. I see how idiots around here drive on a daily basis, and it scares me.

[Scoutfish]

I drive my son a 1/2mile to his bus stop. Wel, it's his cousins house, and it's on the way to work for me. so it's no trouble.

 

Anyways, once we get there, I hang out until the bus comes.

 

When it's warm, they stay in the truck to get away from the skeeters. They are ferocious in NC!

Right now, it's not so much for heat, but to be out of the 20 degrees and wind.

 

Thing is, it's a a trimary road. Gravel, kinda rural,many neighbors still sleeping. A drunk , a fool driving around the curve ( bus stop is in middle of a curve) too fast or who knows whjat could happen.

 

Not as concerned about kidnapping as much as just getting run over.