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Transferring BACK after Eagle?


Mike F

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How do you really do that? One of the parents was already bounced from the committee once, then spent meeting time snarking around the parking lot talking smack.

 

Kudu's on target with the scorpion story.

 

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

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So, Mike, what did you end up telling these parents? Did you give them the OK to send in applications? Did you tell them you had to take it up with the Committee? What?

 

IF you have given them any kind of an indication that their son might be able to come back, you owe it to them to at least talk it over with the CC and the Committee.

 

Personally, if it were me, as soon as they made the comment about their son taking over the Troop I would have said - sorry, but I don't feel it will be a good match, and then offered to get them contact info for other Troops.

 

BTW - you stated that they felt their son would be the "highest ranking Scout" because he was an Eagle. Does that mean that your Troop currently has no Eagle Scouts? Do your boys tend to leave when they reach Eagle? Do most make Eagle right before their 18th birthday? Just trying to see where their ideas are coming from.

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Horizon,

 

This situation does not sound like the troop can pick and choose the package (i.e. accept the Scout but not the parents.) It sounds like if the troop accepts one, it gets them all! Remember it was stated that the parent that quit the Troop Committee stalked the parking lot spewing anger. Who really wants to deal with that again? I sure as heck would not.

 

MikeF, I suggest that you tell the parents and Scout that it was not a good fit the first time he was with the troop and you see nothing that would indicate now is any different. In my opinion, it will be easier to deal with any fallout from this approach than it will be dealing with the family in the troop again.

 

Good luck,

Chazz Lees

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Thanks again for your insights.

 

When they originally left, I didn't broadcast the reason. None of the boys and minority of the adults knew the full extent of the behind the scenes drama, nuclear emails, etc.

 

About 2 months ago, I received an email from one parent about visiting with intent to transfer back after Eagle. After agonizing for days, I told them NO its not in the boys best interest to transfer back and forth.

 

I found out last night they have made several visits to recruit for the upcoming Eagle project and chum around. These visits all took place when I was out of town.

 

When the parent showed up last night with some other family members and started talking about how much they looked forward to coming back in a few months so they (yes they) could enjoy our program, I pulled parent outside alone and said NO again. There was just too much drama and hard feelings the last time. Were not opening ourselves up to this whole scene again.

 

After the meeting, I gave senior youth leaders the condensed version.

Scoutmaster Staff is now fully informed.

CC will quit the day this family walks in our door as members.

 

We are going to batten down the hatches as we prepare to take some heavy rolls. At least the storm will be on the outside of the ship.

 

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Wow with the continuing story, I would not even have your troop help with the eagle project (although I am sure that any help would have been light). But, if they can not take "No" for an answer, then anyone for your troop showing up to help with the project would be concieved by them as an open invite to return to your troop.

 

This is the time where "NO" must be firm in word and in deed.

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You, the CC, and the other leaders should jointly speak to the COR and the DE to make sure they are onboard with you if they get asked about the issue by council.

 

You don't need one of them saying something when they don't know whats going on.

 

I think you have made the correct decision for the troop as a whole.

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I would disagree with moosetracker ... you can't prevent one of your Scouts from helping with the boy's Eagle project. If they do, more power to 'em. But the decisions of your individual boys is in no way a reflection on your decision as a troop not to allow this Scout to rejoin.

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Oh, I didn't mean to get in front of the scouts and say something like "Don't help on Johnnys Eagle project because we don't like his parents.."

 

I would just as a troop not promote it. If someone from your troop is a personal friend of his then they may want to help. But, then it is a personal decision, not a troop decision to band together and help as a unit.

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