Stosh Posted September 20, 2010 Share Posted September 20, 2010 One must remember that when they take a comment out of context, it can and often times leads to a completely different intent than what was originally meant. To "break the cycle" often times does not mean break the kid in the process or to do any physical or emotional harm to him. It only means to do something different to produce a different outcome. If every time Sammy has his tantrums, parents, scout leaders, teachers, etc. all react the same way, he will know how to work the system. However, if any one should happen NOT to react in a way expected by Sammy, it will throw off his ability to produce the outcome he anticipates. I do this with normal kids, (that is if any of them are ever "normal"). If they screw up, they expect adults to come down on them with both feet and when that doesn't happen, they are at a loss what to do. It breaks the cycle of behavior and forces a different outcome. If tantrums produce a benefit for this scout, what happens when it doesn't produce the anticipated outcome? They need to reevaluate what happened and it buys enough time and attention that the situation can be addressed in a whole new light. Sharky's original comment stated: "He has not been diagnosed with any behavioral problems, he's just extremely immature." and I'm assuming if there is any serious problems that need to be addressed, the parents, teachers, counselors, etc. along the way would have tried them by the time he's 14 years old. One has to remember sometimes people on this thread read just what's written and don't tend to read anything more into it. Stosh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanKroh Posted September 20, 2010 Share Posted September 20, 2010 "One must remember that when they take a comment out of context, it can and often times leads to a completely different intent than what was originally meant." Stosh, it was not my intent to take your comment out of context. I know what you meant by "break the cycle" of behavior. However, from what little info Sharky has relayed, there is some reason to doubt the young man's ability to react in a rational way to such an event. I don't know his mental state, so I'm just urging a little caution in thinking that there cannot be serious negative consequences of a permanent sort in this situation if someone tweaks this lad the wrong way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScoutNut Posted September 20, 2010 Share Posted September 20, 2010 >>"Sharky's original comment stated: "He has not been diagnosed with any behavioral problems, he's just extremely immature." and I'm assuming if there is any serious problems that need to be addressed, the parents, teachers, counselors, etc. along the way would have tried them by the time he's 14 years old." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
perdidochas Posted September 20, 2010 Share Posted September 20, 2010 Scoutnut, I agree with you. Tantrums like that are far from normal for a 14 yr old. The boy and parents need outside intervention, ideally from some kind of professional counselor (or doctor). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharky1998 Posted September 24, 2010 Author Share Posted September 24, 2010 Update: Last weekend's campout went pretty smooth. First thing, I told my problem scout that I was very disappointed with his behavior at summer camp and would not tolerate any such behavior this weekend. I especially did not want to see him give the troop a black eye by acting out in front of the church members. I told him he would be sent home immediately, and lose future camping priveleges. He promised me he would not be a problem. There were no tantrums that weekend; Saturday night there was some petty bickering with another scout, but the other scout was equally to blame, and it was at the end of a long day following a 20-mile bike ride. Both were told to turn in and call it a night. I think this shows that he can control the behavior when he chooses to, but only time will tell.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mc99218 Posted September 24, 2010 Share Posted September 24, 2010 When they stop playing the game just send them home to their parents... we are not in the disciplinary or diagnostic business. Some of us may have the bonifides (for such) but most do not nor is the window of time sufficient...and other dragons If the issue is serious enough in the opinion of a savvy scoutmaster then a parent-child-scoutmaster redo is warranted to renegotiate "the deal" and bring back a scout who will "play the game" It is important not to create an impression of tossing the boy on the heap of losers and continue to be his advocate but with conditions of trying to live the Oath and Law. Scoutmasters must not delegate this job to ASMs or other well intended but misguided volunteers...Its why they get the pretty patch with "SCOUTMASTER" on it... all scoputng is local MCCET PMTNPO OWL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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