Question re inappropriate scout leader relationships

[OldGreyEagle]

OK, maybe class clown was a little harsh and so I apologize to GoldWinger for that, however, perhaps "master chain puller" would work better. Not above pushing buttons is another.

[NancyB]

If the behavior is blatant enough at a meeing for a boy to figure out, where was the scoutmaaster or other leaders? I really don't care what they are doing outside the meeting, but scouting is for boys and not a dating service for the adults.

 

I know there is always a huge debate as to whether or not to tell the spouse, but in this day and age, i would hope that I would be told. With aids and other diseases, it's not just about cheating anymore. I dont know that someone who is cheating would be responsible enough to keep themselves safe and could pass it along to his family.

 

And my daughter has both a male and a female leader in her girl scouts group. The male comes along on overnights but is very careful about where he puts his tent, etc. and his beahavior toward the other women in the area has always been above reproach.

[ScoutMomSD]

Nancy, I feel for you. Having not been in your shoes, my take on it would be to ask the dad to meet with the Den Leader and CC. I think its the old "we dont care what you do in your personal life away from scouts but you need to keep it out of the scouting arena" making it clear its not a value judgement, but about the boys.

 

There was a different issue with a couple in our pack and I have to say to the credit of the dad, he acted in a very mature and professional way. Of course he is a very intelligent professional in his personal life. It did not bleed over into the scouts.

 

I will be blunt, kidding or not, many of the above comments are offensive. It reminds me of the oft stated quote of my kids who say "it was an accident" - my comment is always, accident or not, joke or not, its still inappropriate. And will be dealt with as if it was done on purpose. Its like using the N word, then saying "just kidding" or the B word to a woman, and stating "just kidding".

 

I have an issue with this statement from Mr Boyce "Kick me for saying this all you like, but there's a strong part of me that wants to say, "this kind of stuff is what you get when you start bringing more women into the program." OK, kick away. Interesting to recall, was in 79?, the number of pregnancies that happened on board a Navy ship on a long Mediterranean tour a few years back. Not that many pregnancies in WW II duty, I'll bet!"

 

So I assume that Hillary and Sarah Palin arent the right folks to bring "into the (political) program", right? And I would bet that despite the change in the armed forces mix, the percent of men with STD's hasnt changed - in fact werent a lot of the STD's we have now in the US originally from the wars?

 

I would be fine TODAY backing out of scouts and having my hubbie do all. BUT he cant make all the meetings and events, isnt the one keeping the schedule of all the events, doesnt buy or sew on the patches or uniform, read the handbook, and doesnt have time to go to the leadership meetings. Our pack was started primarily by 2 women also. So this week I wash and pack the clothes and supplies for my hubbie and son's weekend. I think I speak for myself as well as the other mom's in our Den and pack - GO FOR IT, take it ALL away from me!

 

 

[Vicki]

Scoutmom, welcome to the forum.

 

Please note Mr. Boyce clarified his point when he wrote, in response to me, "People are not 100% rational, nor do they follow the rules 100% of the time. The BSA, by encouraging female leaders, gets some new problems in addition to other gains and positives."

 

This is true, as the original thread subject proves, so taking issue with his original post without considering the clarification in subsequent posts doesn't seem, to me, to be very helpful.

 

Also, without trying to take your post on anything but its face value, I hope you were intentionally overstating your case. I'm not in scouting because my beloved wouldn't do it (although he wouldn't, he was more into Cubs), I'm in scouting because I like it. Hopefully you are, too.

 

Please try to take the above in the intended spirit of courtesy and kindness,

Vicki

(This message has been edited by Vicki)