Solo Scouters

[prairie]

I don't yet have kids or a wife, judging from the other posters here that makes me unusual as a Scouter.

How common is the solo Scouter?

Do they serve for longer periods?

Any proablems their single status causes?

Any troop/pack events they avoid to protect their good name?

I do follow the child safety rules like my life depends on it and try to act in a manner so that other Scouters are in compliance as well.

Not too hard at this point as my use to the troop is mostly me being at meetings so there are at least two adults present, nobody is intrested yet in the merit badges I can mentor.

[FScouter]

In general Id say most Scouters get involved in Scouting because they have a son in the program. Most people with a son also have a spouse, which means theyre not single. I dont seen any particular problem with a single Scouter. Maybe thats because I am one. My wife quit the family several years ago, and my son worked his way through the program, earned his Eagle rank, aged out, and is now in college. Still, I remain active with the troop and the district. Marital status has zip to do with the love of Scouting.

 

Youth protection rules have absolutely nothing to do with ones marital status. It might even be argued that most YP violators are married?

 

I cant imagine any Scouting event where an unmarried individual would feel unwelcome or out of place.

 

If you want to sign up as a MB counselor, get the application from the district and sign up. Why wait to be invited?

 

By the way, there is no requirement for two adults at a troop meeting.

[Eamonn]

I was active as a Scouter for about ten years before I married Her Who Must Be Obeyed.

If it wasn't for Scouting we would never have met.

Nearly all of my closest friends are Scouter's on both sides of the pond. I enjoy their company and we seem to share the same values and have a lot in common.

I used to think that I enjoyed the company of young Lads, but having now worked with a coed unit I find that the girls are every bit as much fun as the boys.

I know a good many Scouter's who never married. They seemed happy to look upon the Boys in the units they served as some sort of a extended family.

A few years back I had the bright idea of honoring a Scouter from our District with a James E. West Award.

Pete Rice, had served Troop 133 for a very long time. He loved that Troop. Even the number plate on his truck was TROOP 133.

He had never married, but even in his 80's could remember the names of all the Scouts who had ever been in the Troop.

I sent out a letter asking for donations hoping we would raise the $1,000 needed for the award.

Pete already had the Silver Beaver, and was a Vigil member of the OA.

We ended up with over $5,000. The letters from his ex-scouts were real tear jerker's. We read them at a District Dinner -There wasn't a dry eye in the house.

A month or so later Scouting Magazine was doing an article on inner-city Scouting in Ohio. They interviewed a SM who was doing a good job working with these inner-city Scouts. This Scouter said that everything he done was due to his "Old Scoutmaster -Pete Rice."

I was really pleased that we managed to name one of the buildings at camp for Pete and we did it a few years before he passed away.

Scouting and Troop 133 was Pete's vocation and he did a splendid job.

Ea.

[Trevorum]

I agree with FScouters comments about single adults.

 

In thinking about our own unit of 50+ families, I am struck how our sample is NOT representative of my non-scouting friends. Among the non-Scouting families I know (work, neighbors), I would guess that at least 50% are blended, re-mixed, etc. In contrast, most of the Scouting families I know are stable and have never been through divorce or a family break-up. I'm not sure why that is. Perhaps the adults who tend to have scouting values already - and thus are receptive to recruiting efforts when their children become of age - tend to stay in stable relationships.

[GernBlansten]

In my family, nobody got divorced, no aunt/uncle, cousin, grandparent, parent. Nobody in my family tree. Large mid-western farming family. My brother is the only Eagle scout in that tree. He recently divorced breaking the winning streak. Not sure if there's a correlation there.

 

As for the single scouter, it wouldn't raise an eyebrow to me if the scouter had a strong relationship with scouting as a youth and wanted to give back to the program. It would raise both eyebrows if he didn't. The latter case wouldn't disqualify him, but a bit extra vigilance would be appropriate.

[prairie]

Thanks for the replys, they have followed what people have said in person to me. I am a merit badge counselor, I just need to poll the Scouts to see what badges I could help with, Astronomy has already been earned by most and nobody is intrested in Ag Mechanics so far.

Ours is a tiny troop, quite possible for only one scout to be in the building at a time, not for long but the rules don't have time limits.

 

I welcome further replys.

[Koda]

I fall into the category of "solo scouter." I've never been married and I have no children of my own. Scouting did so much for me as a youth that I feel an obligation to give back as much as I can.

I got back into scouting because I was in a relationship with a mother of 2. At the time her son was just starting wolves and they were in need of a den leader. My relationship with his mother didn't work out but I continued on as his scout leader. She encouraged me to keep a relationship with her children, if fact the kids and I just went out to dinner and a movie yesterday. Now I'm Cubmaster and Nate will be crossing over into boy scouts at the end of the month and me with him. I'm stepping down as Cubmaster and taking an assignment as district commissioner. I don't know how my longevity would compare to a married father but I know I'm in it for as long as I'm physically able. I'm 32 so I still have several more years before I 'retire' from scouting.

I've never noticed any raised eyebrows because of my attendance at any event therefore I don't feel discourage to attend any scouting activity. Of course we always follow the youth protection guidelines but I don't think I've been singled out as someone to watch out for because I'm solo.

[FScouter]

I can be really nave at times. Could someone point out exactly what the thinking is when eyebrows are raised concerning an unmarried Scouter? What is it we should be vigilant against? If solo Scouters should be watched, what are we watching for?

[GernBlansten]

Motives.

If you have a child in the program, the motivation for you to become a leader is self evident and pure.

If you were a child in the program, and even though you don't have children, but want to help, your motivation is pure.

If you have no children and were never in the program as a youth, we must suspect your motivations. They may be pure, they may not. If eyebrows are not raised, you are naive.

[epalmer84]

From 1976 through 1999 I was a bachelor Scouter. This is my ninth troop as an adult, and I have been a Scoutmaster in five of those (I moved around a lot in my Army days).

 

I married in 1999 to a Scout mom and we split in 2001. I remarried in 2006 and she is now an assistant Scoutmaster and an associate Advisor.

 

 

Ed

[Chippewa29]

I am also in my 30's, still single and childless (although keeping my eyes open for the right woman who will appreciate my Scouting involvement). I'm the Scoutmaster of the troop I was in as a youth. I became an ASM when I turned 18 and helped out during the summers while I was in college. When I got into my mid-20's, I started to get more active year-round and by my late-20's I was a "full timer". I took over as SM about six years ago and love it.

 

There have been times over the years when a parent would wonder what a single guy was doing working with kids. I'd explain to them that I was very fortunate to have good Scout leaders as a youth and felt it was important to give back for all I received. I also love to go hiking and camping and get to feed my habit monthly with the troop. Besides, I've never really been into hanging out in the bars like a lot of single people.

 

In Scouting, it is great to have some young, single leaders for several reasons. First of all, their pariticipation is based on helping the whole troop rather than being there for their own son. Never once have I ever been charged with favoring certain Scouts (how many arguments have started because the SM's son supposedly got special treatment). Also, a lot of the parents think its great to have a "cool young guy" teaching their sons the same values they want to teach. For a lot of the Scouts, I was like an older brother or cool uncle. There are a lot of ways a younger non-parent adult can relate to Scouts and present a whole new dimension to the adult association aspect of Scouting.

 

Every troop should actively encourage their alums that stay in the area to continue working with the troop. About the time a Scout ages out, they are often just becoming a really good leader. They obviously have to adjust the way they lead, but they can be valuable resources.

 

If you look back at the early years of Scouting, many of the SM's were young single teachers or ministers.

[eagle90]

My story is similar to Chippewa's. Never married, no children. Also the SM of the troop of my youth. I was asked to take over the troop when I was 24 and no one else would, and here we are 30+ years later, still SM!

 

I also wanted to give back to the program for the many benefits I received. It also gives me a group to go camping with, something I would never do on my own if not associated with Scouting.

 

And now I find my best friends are the friends I have made through Scouting.

[Scouter&mom]

Obviously, I am the really "odd" one here. I am single and very involved in Scouting. Yes, I do have a son in the troop, but what makes me "odd" is I am FEMALE. Why did I become ASM? I love doing the outdoor things, and the troop needed adults. I have been to a number of council things (campouts/summer camp/etc) and not gotten raised eyebrows. I guess because I don't ask to be treated differently (except I must admit, I have not camped a time or two when facilities were real primitive). I don't think I have ever been asked about being single, but I have had a couple of people think I am married to a good griend of mine who is also in Scouting.

[prairie]

Guess I should have mentioned i'm in my late 40s.

I gave up on a couple of clubs that required long travel times and/or very late nights so felt the need for something to fill the void. I drifted out of scouting at 16 and a Star, I think partly because I was the oldist one there plus I'm best suited as a 2nd banana.

Chippewa29, even at my "advanced" age I'm keeping my eyes open, proablem is in the late 1970s the girls in this area all left as soon as they were outa high school, never to return, single in the city looked better than married in the country?

It's been intresting reading about the motivations for the solo scouter and comforting to hear of there acceptance in the movement.

Any more Solos out there?

 

[Fuzzy Bear]

Most all of us that are in Scouting for any length of time will wind up without a son or relative in it. Having a son in Scouting may be reason enough to join but to stay beyond that time takes a love for the program. There is no reason to condemn someone's love or to make one feel guilty for finding a second home there. People today are more aware of the kinds of problems that some have had that work with youth but that is the minority. The Catholic Church has had its' share of problems but all priests are not to be condemned because they are single and love serving God. Care and awareness are to be observed at all times but we need to be careful not to go beyond that point or we will keep people away that have only their best to share. fb