Knowing Names

[SemperParatus]

In another thread, kenk writes...

 

"As a Cubmaster I guess I didn't worry too much about not knowing most of the names in the other dens at den meetings. I got along fine not knowing."

 

I am sure kenk is a great guy, but this struck me as very odd. I have always taken it for granted that the CM/SM knows the name and face of every boy in the unit. Even as the CM/SM of very large units )100+), I always made it a point to get the names and faces of all scouts and parents burned into my brain as soon as possible.

 

Am I mistaken? Do most CM/SM know the names of each boy in the unit, or is this not as common as I always thought.

 

[msnowman]

Okay, so I was CM for a small pack (9 boys atm), but I knew each boy's name, his parents names (or at least the adult he lived with) and probably most of his siblings names. I would think, at a minimum, a CM/SM/Advisor would want to know the names of the youth members in his/her Pack/Troop/Crew/Ship (did I forget one?). We expect them to know our names, I think the least we can do is return the favor.

 

Though, for the record - there is a pair of identical twins in the Tiger Den and I'm still not great at telling them apart, but I know both names....I just can't always tell which is which.

 

YiS

Michelle

Wolf/Bear DL

[Cubmaster Jerry]

I too feel that as CM I should not only know the names and faces of each boy but as many parents as I could try to remember as well. While I feel that way, it doesn't make it any easier for me. I usually have a tough time remembering names. And with 115 boys in the Pack, that makes it even tougher. But I keep trying. I attend as many Den meetings as I can to help in this endeavor. For me, it's a big hill to climb! But I am doing my best!

 

Jerry

[eagle90]

I am fairly good with names and faces, so yes, I get to know the names of all our members an their parents. I also try to find out and remember what their occupations and hobbies are if I can. It may come in handy some time in the future when a need arises. I sympathize with Michelle too. We had a set of identical twins join us for about a year, and I never could tell them apart!

[EagleInKY]

When I started as cubmaster, we only had about 20 boys. I knew all of them by name within a couple of months. I even knew most of the parents. But by the time we were 60-strong, I couldn't keep up. For the boys that joined at roundup (usually 15-20), I typically didn't get to know their names until rechartering or round-up. And there would always be one or two I'd struggle with.

 

As for the parents, it would take even longer to get to know them. They didn't always show up (sometimes the mom brought them, sometimes the dad, etc.), and at pack meetings the boys sat with their den, not with the parents. It usually wasn't until they got their rank advancements in the spring that I started putting them together.

 

Then summer would come and we'd start all over again...

[SR540Beaver]

I'm great with faces, but horrible at names until I've actually interacted with the person. An interaction for me does not include an introduction and a handshake. It means spending some time with the person.

 

My opposite is our pastor. He is amazing. We probably have 1500 members in our church. His first week, he was taken around to all of the sunday school classes and individually introduced to everyone regardless of age. As we were leaving church his second week, he called my son (7 or 8 at the time) by name. He had met at least 1000 people a week ago and could recall a 7 year old boys name off the top of his head!!! Pretty impressive in my book.

[Trevorum]

IMHO a very important aspect of the SM job is to know every scout and parent by name. I am generally poor at remembering names, but I make it a point to know all the new guys by their second meeting and to greet them by name. "Hi Bobby!" "Hey there Jake, good to see you!"

[Lynda J]

My dad was a very wise man. He always said that the most important thing you can do in business and life it remember names. That it makes people feel you are interested in them as a person and that they have importance.

 

I can not imagine being Cub Master and not thinking it is important to know the boys names in your Pack. Unless you have a pack that has 400-500 boys. I directed our districts day camp 4 years. Had well over 100 boys each year. By the 3rd day of camp I knew almost every boys name.

I also remembered the names of the boys that came back the next year.

 

Any adult that thinks kids don't appreciate having their names remembered as it is an adult, isn't connected with the real world.

 

In my business it is vital I remember customers names. I also remember what car they drive. And for the most part what we did to it the last time it was in the shop. It makes my customers feel that they are special.

Remembering a childs name makes them feel special.(This message has been edited by Lynda J)

[EagleInKY]

Trev - I agree. As SM the responsibility to know the boys is much greater than that of the CM. I usually know all of their names within the first meeting or so, but I will have met with them several times before that. Being involved with the pack helps me in that way.

 

I, too, know of a pastor that is phenominal at this. We moved away from my hometown when I was just shy of 9 years old. Our last Sunday was his first Sunday. This was also a church of 1000+ members. A few months later we were back to visit, and he remembered all of us by name (including this 9 year old). Through the years we visit from time-to-time and he knows not only our name, but many details about us. He of course now knows my wife and kids. He is truly amazing. No wonder he's been there for over 30 years. Pretty rare in any job, especially ministers. I wish I had that skill. (Is it a sin to be jealous of a minister?)

[Lisabob]

Semper I had that same reaction. Yes I think it is important for the CM/SM to know the names of the boys in the unit. If s/he doesn't then that suggests that they aren't spending much time with the kids and thus they aren't getting a chance to really do the job. Perhaps that's because they're busy doing 101 other things that someone else in the leadership really ought to be doing instead, and they simply need more volunteers to lend a hand.

 

For those who are bad with names, by all means use name tags if you need them - though this is largely a skill that can be learned with practice for most people. For those with large packs or troops, yes it is tougher (On occasion I have had to teach courses with 300+ students so I understand that it is MUCH harder to remember names/faces as the group size increases).

 

But an awful lot of the kids I've met in scouting really need this social validation and interaction and just the fact that some adult cares enough to know their name is important to them.

 

Lisa'bob

[msnowman]

I have to respectfully disagree with EagleinKY when he said "As SM the responsibility to know the boys is much greater than that of the CM."

 

It is just as important for a CM to know the youth he/she is serving as it is for a SM. A 6 year old Tiger deserves to have his CM know his name as much as a 12 year old 1st class Scout does.

 

YiS

Michelle

[LongHaul]

I'm so bad at remembering names it should be illegal. I can remember hundreds of names and faces of the people I went to high school with 40 years ago but remembering the names of people I meet today really takes effort. As SM I've tried many different "tools" to help me overcome my problem, the one the boys responded to best was this. I made a deal with each new scout that when he was given a task to perform, be it kybo duty or KP he could come to me and ask me what his name was, if I couldn't recall it within 5 seconds I would do the task for him. I've washed a lot of dishes and fetched a lot of wood but I do know my boys and they know that I care enough about them that I will admit to my fault and try to correct it.

LongHaul

[DanKroh]

As I approach our Blue and Gold Banquet, when I will be inducted as the new Cubmaster, I admit that this topic has been on my mind.

 

I want to get to know all the boys in our pack (and know them by name), and as many of their parents as I can.

 

However, I, too, am generally terrible at remembering names. In my business, I remember an amazing number of details about each of my clients, but have a hard time associating names and faces with people who I haven't sat and talked with for at least a few minutes.

 

I've thought about doing nametags, but that seems like a crutch to me. I'll have to see how feasible it is to sit with each boy for a few minutes and talk to him, find out his interests, etc., during the controlled chaos of the pack meetings.

 

Any other suggestions for ideas for remembering names would be greatly appreciated by this CM-to-be.

[msnowman]

Dan - when I was first CM I would try to take time after the Pack meetings to get to know the boys and their parents. I have found that sometimes the younger boys were especially shy around me when I was the CM...and why not? They usually only saw me once or twice a month, otherwise it was their den leader they interacted with...I was a little more than a stranger. So, I did the same thing after Spring and Fall recruiting or if we had visiting family (grandparents etc). There would always be somebody I had met before but simply couldn't pull their names out of my head. I simply fess up and say "I know we've met before but I just can't seem to recall your name". For some reason I've never had to say that to the same person twice...Okay, except the twins...

 

YiS

Michelle

 

[SR540Beaver]

I'm so aware of my issue with remembering names that I always always wear my name badge on my uniform to make remembering my name easier for people. A few adults in my unit wear name tags, but not all. It would have made it easier for me to learn them rather than eavesdropping on conversations to catch their name. The boys of course don't wear tags. I just have to pick their names up as we go along. It only takes a few meetings or a campout or two.