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Santa Claus Explained (turns out he was a boy scout)


eisely

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When my son was 6, he sprung this question on me:

 

Son: "Dad, I think I'm old enough to know now. Is there a Santa Claus?"

 

Not being the world's fastest thinker, I stalled for time.

 

Me: "OK, I agree that you're old enough. But before I tell you, I have a question for you. You see, the truth is a dangerous gift. Once you know something, you can't un-know it. Once you know the truth about Santa Claus, you will never again understand and elate to him as you do now. So my question is: Are you sure you want to know?"

 

Brief pause.

 

Son: "Yes. I want to know."

 

Me: "OK, I'll tell you: Yes, there IS a Santa Claus."

 

Son: "Really?"

 

Me: "Yes, really, but he's not an old man with a beard in a red suit. That's just what we tell kids. You see, kids are too young to understand the true nature of Santa Claus, so we explain it to them in a way that they can understand. The truth about Santa Claus is that he's not a person at all; he's an idea. Think of all those presents Santa gave you over the years. I actually bought those myself. I watched you open them. And did it bother me that you didn't thank me? Of course not! In fact it gave me

great pleasure. You see, Santa Claus is THE IDEA OF GIVING FOR THE SAKE OF GIVING, without thought of thanks or acknowledgement. When I saw that woman

collapse on the subway last week and called for help, I knew that she'd never know that it was me who summoned the ambulance. I was being Santa Claus when I did that."

 

Son: "Oh."

 

Me: "So now that you know, you're part of it. You have to be Santa Claus too now. That means you can never tell a young kid the secret, and you have to help us select Santa presents for them, and most important, you have to look for opportunities to help people. Got it?"

 

Son: "Sure, Dad!"

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Nice heartwarming story. Now for some levity.

 

Why did Santa Claus go see his doctor the day before Christmas Eve? He wanted to make sure he had his "flue" shot.

 

What did Santa say to the lumber jack? Only four more "chopping days" until Christmas!

 

Santa scheduled a session with his psychiatrist. During the first session the psychiatrist asked him why he was there? Santa's response, "I no longer believe in me."

 

Did anyone see the SNL "TV Funhouse" episode with the Santa Claus that did not want to deliver presents to the "blue" states. Regardless of ones politics, it was hilarious.

 

Merry Christmas to all! (Especially to you Merlyn :) )

 

 

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Santa is an Eagle Scout,

it's very plain to see.

Just listen to this little poem of mine

and I am sure you'll agree

 

Santa navigates by the stars

on Christmas Eve.

After all, his very first merit badge

was Astronomy.

 

To fly his sleigh

with finesse,

Santa took

Aviation merit badge next.

 

Santa and his reindeer

have a friendly alliance.

He learned it all

while earning Veterinarian Science.

 

Engineering merit badge

was very hard for Santa Claus.

Going down a chimney is an engineering feat,

if there ever was.

 

Santa's service project

was for all the boys and girls.

He delivers toys

all around the world.

 

And lastly, Santa's work on

Communication merit badge was out of sight

That's when he thought of the phrase

"Merry Christmas and to all a good night"

 

And to all a good night...

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Back home Santa Claus, is known as Father Christmas, I think that I believed until I was ten or eleven.

About that age my parents started buying us them terrible practical gifts (Socks and underwear) But Father Christmas, was a kindly old Lad, nothing practical about him. We woke up on Christmas Day morning to find the end of the bed stacked high with toys and good stuff. You think he could have had a word with my parents and informed them that kids don't want socks and underwear. Maybe they were just slow learners.

Santa still came to our house until OJ was nine. By the time he was ten he pretended to believe, I'm not sure if he didn't want to hurt our feelings or if he thought that he'd get more stuff?

Eamonn

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My oldest son asked us about this when he was 10. I remember my wife with tears in her eyes as we drove down the freeway and I explained it almost exactly as eisley has.

 

My youngest son is almost 16 now. He STILL has yet to ask about Santa or admit he thinks anything other than Santa is a real person. It's quite humorous actually. Our entire family walks and talks as if this big secret has yet to be unveiled, even though we all know it is just a rouse because my son has never OFFICIALLY asked if Santa was real.

 

Although it's never been discussed by any of us, I think that this is the holiday tradition that has developed in our family.

 

Merry Christmas!

 

Mark

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