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First-Year Scout wants out already... Is this normal?


FireStone

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5 hours ago, FireStone said:

I think he feels like he would be considered a "snitch" if he speaks up.

Here's an opportunity to talk to him like an adult, and that will help. You say you "think he feels ..." but you aren't sure. So ask him in a way that respects his desire for not "snitching." Tell him you don't want to know the details of who or what but whether it's happening and whether he knows how to deal with it. This is a problem that a lot of young scouts go through. They're constantly being told about the scout law and oath and it only takes one older scout that's grumpy or doesn't want to be there that will make a mockery of everything. Get two together and I can easily see a scout with a good heart say this is a farce.

If this really is the problem then his walking away from scouts would be a shame. I agree with others that it should be his choice but it should be an informed choice.

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20 minutes ago, MattR said:

If this really is the problem then his walking away from scouts would be a shame. I agree with others that it should be his choice but it should be an informed choice.

I think it's a problem, but not the problem in and of itself. It's more a combo of things. He's unhappy with the greater personal responsibility he has in a troop vs. a pack where advancement is almost automatic, you just have to show up and do what you're asked. He also is indicating that he is in scouts because of me, but I know he also has a lot of fun on some of the trips and had an absolute blast at summer camp. So I'm trying to decipher if he feels maybe I got him into this and he's still doing it because of me or if he's doing it because he enjoys it or not.

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I'd suggest maybe taking a little step back from the troop meetings, but encourage him to get some fun merit badges done. It's unfortunate that he didn't get any at summer camp. Our troop doesn't allow participation in most first-year or trail-to-first-class programs, because we want advancement to be natural and within the troop. 

My older son was Mr. Gung-ho scout for his first 4 years, and he even completed a lot of high adventure. Now he is Life but almost burned out, and he finds himself dragging himself across the finish line.  My younger son (2 years younger) was not into the program much at all. Didn't fight it, but just not that happy with camping and taking responsibility. Now, almost 3 years into ScoutsBSA and almost first-class, but with a good stash of merit badges he's proud of, he's on a turn around and eagerly participates, is looking forward to being a Troop Guide and taking on some high adventure. 

Kids mature at different rates, and have different interests at different times. Through COVID on top of that and their lives are scrambled and many are just now starting to figure out what "normal" feels like to them.

 

 

 

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