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Summer Camp Skits


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I know this is a little long, but I wanted to get a review. I wrote this for summer camp and it never got performed. I'd like to get your reactions.

 

 

Whats the Name of this CD?

 

Scout 1: Hey Walter (or other name), how are you doing?

 

Scout 2: Fine, You know I really like Summer Camp, but I miss being in touch with music

 

Scout 1: Yeah, I know what you mean, but the guys in my troop try to find things related to music all around us

 

Scout 2: How do you do that?

 

Scout 1: Well, its like at the trading post, whatever the total I always give them 5 cents more than the total so I can get a NICKELBACK

 

Scout 2: Whoa NELLY, thats pretty good, you mean like whats the stuff you eat on a cob?

 

Scout 1: Yeah, thats it, KORN And if your in a hurry Whats that?

 

Scout 2: Oh easy, RUSH, I guess you could say NO DOUBT its a SIMPLE PLAN to keep music in mind at all times This is great since I am such an AUDIOSLAVE

 

Scout 1: Yeah, this way I dont feel so TRAPT I head a kid in one of the troops is really homesick, he woke up last night screaming

 

Scout 2: Yeah, he doesnt think anybody likes him and feels like an OUTKAST

 

Scout 1: You know what we call the glow of the fire after the flames die down?

 

Scout 2: EVANESCENCE?

 

Scout 1: When the sun rises they say day breaks

 

Scout 2: And when the sun sets, THE DARKNESS falls

 

Scout 1: Good, You know how the OA get their fires started,

 

Scout 2: Sure, liquid FUEL

 

Scout 1: Sure are a lot of bugs around here, do you have any repellent?

 

Scout 2: Sure I do, its 12 percent deet, they call it D-12, repells anything

 

Scout 1: Hey you kids in the front row, quit talking and behave like scouts

 

Scout 2: Yeah, do we have to call for an USHER to throw you out?

 

Scout 1: Can you believe the menu? BLACK EYED PEAS three days in a row

 

Scout 2: Yeah, thats not right, thats stupid, its outrageous, its LUDICRIS! Did you see those dumplings they made? They looked more like a LIMP BIZKIT than anything else

 

Scout 1: Did you hear the San Antonio Spurs starters all went sailing together after the season? They got in some bad weather though and went through a series of storms

 

Scout 2: Ok, that explains the Head line, Typhoons MAROON 5

 

Scout 1: I really like the Camp Director this year, he is a really nice guy

 

Scout 2: Yeah, I know what you mean, You could say he is a PRINCE among men I hear he flies a JET in the Air National Guard

 

Scout 1: Hey, I just got a letter from home, my mom judges show dogs as a hobby

 

Scout 2: She does? Thats neat, what breed of Dog ?

 

Scout 1: Yeah, her specialty is the Spaniel breed, you know like Cocker Spaniel, Springer Spaniel, Irish water Spaniel, those kinds of dogs There was quite an stir at the National Spaniel Show last month my mom says

 

Scout 2: What happened?

 

Scout 1: Well, the headline in Spaniels Monthly says it all, BRITTANY SPEARS

Number one rank I am not sure about the E-Con Director though

 

Scout 2: What do you mean? I really like him, he/she is a whiz at identifying edible plants

 

Scout 1: Well, he/she might think he/she is good at identifying edible plants, but you know those wild mushrooms that were picked?

 

Scout 2: Yeah, I think they were referred to as Houbies

 

Scout 1: Yeah, Houbies, Scoutcraft cooked some of those Houbies, they smelled awful

 

Scout 2: You mean?

 

Scout 1: Thats right, the Houbies stank

 

Scout 1: Did you hear next year they are combining the Space Exploration merit badge with Environmental Science next year

 

Scout 2: Dont tell me, for three days you have to observe an ALIEN ANT FARM

 

Scout 1: Well, watching ants, even alien ones wouldnt be as bad as watching bees, those things hurt when they STING, By the way, what happened to your shirt? Its awful dirty, did you get in a mud fight?

 

Scout 2: Oh,no it got STAIND in a PUDDLE OF MUD while I as running through LINKIN PARK it was feeding time at the zoo and I wanted to see the GORRILLAZ eat

 

Scout 1: I am not sure about the Camp EMT either

 

Scout 2: Hows That

 

Scout 1: I got a bug in my eye and it hurt, he said I should just flush it out with my own tears

 

Scout 2: You mean he wanted you to cry?

 

Scout 1: No, not cry, but open and close my eyes real fast

 

Scout 2: Oh I see, he wanted you to BLINK 182 times a minutes

 

Scout 1: I guess the Staff/Leader Soccer game got a little out of hand last night

 

Scout 2: Yeah, I hear 3 staff members were issued a YELLOWCARD

 

Scout 1: What do you call your neighbor next to the guy two houses from you,

 

Scout 2: Thats, easy, he is THREE DOORS DOWN

 

Scout 3: Hey what are you guys talking about?

 

Scout 2: Walter here is telling me how to keep music in mind by using musical group names in general conversation

 

Scout 3: Oh no, not U-2 !!!

(turns to the audience)

 

Heres some we all can do,

 

If a guy who works with silver is called a silver smith, and a guy who works with gold is a goldsmith then a guy who works with arrows is an:

 

(waits)

 

Aerosmith

 

And a Taut line hitch is an example of a what?

 

Slipknot

 

And now a slightly harder question, What musical collection was named after a famous literary father of a Scout?

 

Atticus (Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird)

 

(they get ready to leave the stage)

 

Scout 1: Hey, did you think this skit was funny?

 

Scout 2: I am not sure, I just think the camp director is happy we didnt mention BARE NAKED LADIES

 

(Walk off )

 

Anyone have one they want to share?

 

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I don't have one but I do have a quick story about skits.

 

Last weekends campout our troop held a reunion for the SM's old troop in which he made Eagle. Old troop has been folded for sometime so only a few adults, SM age, and old leaders of the troop were there.

 

One of our patrols did a skit about an indian drownng in his "Tee Pee" after drinking too much tea. Seems that one of the leaders of the old troop remembers doing this same skit when he was an 11 yo scout...50 years ago.

Just shows you how some skits have been around longer than we think.

 

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Awww, c'mon, OGE, That's for the BYRDS!! Man does not live on BREAD alone!!!! Diversity rules!!! This is AMERICA, there's no QUEEN here - we got choices!!!

 

 

I am so close to confessing to my John Denver, Bobby Goldsboro days that it truly frightens me!!!!!!! :)

 

 

Rock On, OGE, you are way to cutting edge for me!!!! I had to ask my son about half those names!!!!

 

jd

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OGE,

 

It was tons of fun, I'm surprised there haven't been more old fogies (foggies?) trying their hand.

 

two minor suggestions:

 

If there will be adults in the audience, do you want to throw them a mental music bone or two to get their minds engaged on that level. In truth, I recognized most of the names you used, but wouldn't recognize specific music from many of the groups. . .Now, if you had been able to use Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, I would have been able to joyfully travel down that nostalgic path!

 

Is it possible that you did such a good job of using band names that you didn't leave much thinking room for your audience? Or do you think they'll still be able to come up with new group names to continue punning along? I could rely on the oldies - though I still like to think of "oldies" as "pre-Beatles".

 

Have Fun!!! I think the crowd will enjoy it!!!

 

jd(This message has been edited by johndaigler)

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