walk in the woods Posted December 12, 2019 Share Posted December 12, 2019 45 minutes ago, TMSM said: Forgiving is not saying what happened was acceptable, its acknowledging that the person feels bad, learned his lesson, taught others and allowing yourself move on. Thats how you regain your power. Amen. Sadly not part of the call out culture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FireStone Posted December 13, 2019 Author Share Posted December 13, 2019 6 hours ago, TMSM said: ... Forgiving is not saying what happened was acceptable, its acknowledging that the person feels bad, learned his lesson, taught others and allowing yourself move on. Thats how you regain your power. But his interview/statement doesn't seem to indicate that he fully acknowledges any of that. He makes excuses, suggests that he may not have even touched her backside, and then dances around an apology but never really gives one. It's easier to forgive when the person in question at least truly realizes what they did. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TMSM Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 Sorry but he clearly say it was a bad decision and not the right way to act. At :51 the girl admits that it is an apology. Is there a rule book or some kind of guideline that says here is exactly how to apologize to get forgiveness? We are a very diverse nation with different cultures and some people may say sorry in different ways. I get it that in your opinion he didnt go far enough or say the right words but if the world would learn to forgive it would be good for all of us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RememberSchiff Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 21 minutes ago, TMSM said: ...some kind of guideline that says here is exactly how to apologize to get forgiveness?... if the world would learn to forgive it would be good for all of us. For some the apology is just one step towards forgiveness, which may or may not come. My $0.02, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
le Voyageur Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 plain as day .... upon conviction he will have to register as a sex offender, thus his days in the Scouting program ends regardless of the position he holds... https://law.justia.com/codes/georgia/2010/title-16/chapter-6/16-6-22-1/ Sexual battery is a misdemeanor of a high and aggravated nature, punishable by up to 12 months in jail and a fine of up to $5,000. A second or subsequent conviction for sexual battery or a conviction for sexual battery against a child under the age of 16 is punishable by one to five years’ imprisonment. (Ga. Code Ann. § § 16-6-1, 16-6-2, 16-6-22.1, 16-6-2.22.) People in Georgia who are convicted of rape, sodomy, or aggravated sexual battery are required to register as sex offenders, as are people are convicted a second or subsequent time of sexual battery. (Ga. Code Ann. § 42-1-12.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwazse Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 44 minutes ago, TMSM said: ... if the world would learn to forgive it would be good for all of us. The problem here is "the world" was not wronged. It has nothing to forgive. It's only option is to sit on the sidelines while the media makes a circus out of these two people's lives. Given the many scouters who I've seen in similar situations as either perpetrator or victim (in real life, not newspaper clippings), I hope that one or two of them will realize that videos are not "a neutral location." Lacking in-person or arbitrated resolution, a courtroom is intended to be such a location, and the only thing that needs to be said is "Guilty, your honor." That will most likely be the course. @le Voyageur, the most reasonable tactic IMHO is to attempt to bargain for a plea of "battery", which would keep the defendant off of the registry. The prosecutor might accept that plea if this is indeed a one-off event and a pattern of sexual assaults is hard to establish. On the other hand, having put himself on the news, other women (or young men) might come forward to report similar behavior. In which case, I feel really sorry for the guy's family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TAHAWK Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 Accusation is now conviction sans trial or plea? I looked at the linked video. Clearly she was surprised, but where she was contacted and with what is not shown. Is there some other video that contradicts the story the accused tells? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwin Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 On 12/12/2019 at 7:45 AM, qwazse said: Thirdly, she's right to be offended, but was slow to react. Are you really suggesting a qualifying timeline to her reaction, as if she took too long then his behavior was less offensive or that she would somehow be less entitled to be outraged? On 12/12/2019 at 7:45 AM, qwazse said: If I were his CC, I'd ask the guy to have a sit down with the scout moms and let them know that they can call him on any other fast-and-loose behavior. So by implication, if he didn't misbehave, then they could't call him out? You would be basically admitting to those moms that this guy is a potential risk so if/when he misbehaves, you should be prepared... You certainly are not having this conversation about what to do regarding any other leaders that have not demonstrated poor behavior. I think I would find another pack if you told me that - and report the CC to the district and council. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwin Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 54 minutes ago, qwazse said: The problem here is "the world" was not wronged. Sure it was. He did this on live tv. Some behaviors are crimes against society and not just the individual. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwin Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 1 hour ago, TAHAWK said: but where she was contacted and with what is not shown. Should it matter? Does the so-called "accused" get to tell the victim that it is less offensive because it was above her belt instead of below and he used something other than his hand to hit her? Maybe she just needs it mansplained to her. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Navybone Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 1 hour ago, TAHAWK said: I looked at the linked video. Clearly she was surprised, but where she was contacted and with what is not shown. Is there some other video that contradicts the story the accused tells? So you think the accused is being wrongfully accused? Why? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RememberSchiff Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 (edited) 40 minutes ago, Hawkwin said: Tahawk: "...but where she was contacted and with what is not shown. " Hawkin: Should it matter? Yes, my understanding, the location would determine whether a battery charge or a sexual battery charge would be filed. Edited December 13, 2019 by RememberSchiff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TMSM Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 Let's relate this to scouts - If scout A slapped the butt of scout B do you call the police? Call the 1-800 of YPT? Have a discussion with both and help them come to some conclusion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RememberSchiff Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 3 minutes ago, TMSM said: Let's relate this to scouts - If scout A slapped the butt of scout B do you call the police? Call the 1-800 of YPT? Have a discussion with both and help them come to some conclusion. IMO, a closer relate would be scout Tommy slapped the butt of scout Jenny. Jenny called the police. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwazse Posted December 13, 2019 Share Posted December 13, 2019 @Hawkwin I'm not sure what you are trying to get at by clipping each quote and restating them as if your extension in a particularly offensive direction reflects my intent. I mean it's okay if you find them patently offensive. And I'm fine with you making arguments by extension. It's that I don't know what you think is the most important facet for me or anyone else to address. Since this forum doesn't offer sub-replies walking through each point is kinda hard to do. (FWIW, the forums once had a sub-reply feature, and most folks found it very confusing.) It's gonna take a while to sort it out. Again, not trying to discourage. Just letting you know that if you're expecting a point-counterpoint, it's not coming soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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