BSA Leader Slaps Backside of Reporter on Live TV

[FireStone]

Just what the BSA needs right now, a leader slapping a young female reporter on the butt on live TV. Tommy Callaway, a 43-year-old married father of two, is facing charges filed by Savannah, GA WSAV-TV anchor Alex Bozarjian, 23. 

On the surface, it's a stupid thing to do and unacceptable behavior from anyone, anywhere. The matter is made worse by a few factors, one being his lack of a real apology (he dances around it in interviews but is defensive and says he thinks he just "touched her back"), and as it relates to all of us, he's a Cub Scout leader. 

I always put myself in the shoes of a Committee Chair. What would I do if this guy was a leader in my Pack and I was the CC? I think I'd have a hard time not asking for him to resign. How could I just let this go? He doesn't seem all that remorseful, and frankly I think he's a YPT risk since he publicly slapped/grabbed the behind of a young woman who could could have been a teenager. She appears very young (she's 23), but for all he knew she could have been a high school intern working for the local news. At the very least his judgement as a leader in a youth organization should be in question, and at worst his membership should maybe be revoked. Surely it will be if he's convicted of a crime here. 

 

Edited December 12, 2019 by FireStone

[TAHAWK]

Clod!

[ianwilkins]

Whatever happened to "turn the other cheek"?

I'm joking. JOKING! 

I know, it's very serious, sorry.

He didn't really think that through did he? 

[walk in the woods]

If we kick every leader out for a momentary lapse in judgement there won't be any leaders.

[qwazse]

I disagree with @FireStone that the BSA doesn't need this. The organization is rife with volunteers who have impertinent moments. The world needs to know that. Youth protection makes it worse because you need more adults for every little thing, and the talent pool just isn't that deep. Doesn't hurt for the world to know that either. If someone is getting all high and mighty about this or any other behavior of our volunteers the reply should be, "If you can do better, here's an adult application."

Secondly there were other people who saw this and said nothing. They wen't on with their race too busy to care. The reporter should call them out. In high school marching band, a judge once butt-slapped me as we were marching single file. My mates tried to diffuse the tension with a little humor, and it helped. But, it would have been nice if one of them would have said, "Sir, this isn't football. We aren't wearing pads. A tap on the shoulder will do."

Thirdly, she's right to be offended, but was slow to react. I've counseled several young women to not countenance any such behavior on their job. Address the public promptly, firmly, and loudly. This reveals a cultural deficiency. In the Arab world, women are taught one simple phrase to shout in public. "Did you see what he did to me?" It can get a guy a solid beating for the slightest jostle. I knew a backpacker who had a little old lady do this because she didn't hear him and his buddy say "Peace be with you" as they walked through her village. They weren't sure they'd make it out alive. We need to imbue our young ladies with that same confidence.

Fourthly, Whoever told the guy that getting on TV would be a good idea should be fired. He didn't offend us. He offended her and her staff. He and his wife should have asked in writing to meet with her, her boss, and her camera man to apologize personally. No interviews. Ever.

If I were his CC, I'd ask the guy to have a sit down with the scout moms and let them know that they can call him on any other fast-and-loose behavior.

[ianwilkins]

5 minutes ago, qwazse said:

If someone is getting all high and mighty about this or any other behavior of our volunteers the reply should be, "If you can do better, here's an adult application."

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly, I err ummm no, I , well, no I don't have time to do that, full time job, kids, house, you know..." 🙄

 

[MattR]

Anyone notice his full time job is a youth minister? He may be the COR. So I guess his scouting job is safe. Not sure about the other one.

[qwazse]

23 minutes ago, MattR said:

Anyone notice his full time job is a youth minister? He may be the COR. So I guess his scouting job is safe. Not sure about the other one.

Yeah. It explains more than it befuddles.

[mds3d]

4 hours ago, walk in the woods said:

If we kick every leader out for a momentary lapse in judgement there won't be any leaders.

This wasn't a "lapse in judgement." This is Sexual Battery under Georgia law.  Kick him out. Send him to a judge.

 

@qwazse : I dont think this is an impertinent moment.  It was a crime. I also don't think she was slow to react.  She was attempting to continue to perform her job without making a scene. She understood that she wasn't in immediate danger and this doofus was on TV.  

If I were the IH of his church he would be fired immediately from both scouts and his job.  Men who think it is appropriate to touch a woman's butt without permission don't have any business in the BSA or being youth ministers. 

 

The only break the BSA is getting here is that most of the news stories are focusing on him being a youth minister. 

Edited December 12, 2019 by mds3d

[ianwilkins]

16 minutes ago, mds3d said:

This wasn't a "lapse in judgement." This is Sexual Battery under Georgia law.  Kick him out. Send him to a judge.

 

Your wish is granted...

https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/news/deplorable-boy-scouts-of-america-cuts-ties-with-rear-slapping-runner

[qwazse]

1 hour ago, mds3d said:

... I dont think this is an impertinent moment.  It was a crime. I also don't think she was slow to react.  She was attempting to continue to perform her job without making a scene. She understood that she wasn't in immediate danger and this doofus was on TV.  ...

@mds3d Not trying to minimize ... impertinence may also be criminal. But, if this rises to the level of criminal, that makes a reporter's attempting to carry on even more disappointing. If the rule is "finish your job before addressing a crime," there are plenty of criminals counting on us giving them that margin. I am glad she called him out via social media, but I hunger for role models for our daughters who assert themselves the moment their honor is called to question. Obviously that's a very hard thing to do. But, IMHO, it would have been better live TV to at least hear the woman shouting "Hey $#$#$, Not cool, man!!!!"

[TMSM]

He made a mistake and apologized. What ever happened to forgiveness? Not saying he shouldn't be punished but we all make mistakes.

[qwazse]

1 hour ago, TMSM said:

He made a mistake and apologized. What ever happened to forgiveness? Not saying he shouldn't be punished but we all make mistakes.

@TMSM, he "apologized" after he was caught. Then he got behind a camera to justify his actions. Probably because someone told him that was what you do to try and save your job. That's not an apology. An apology is an attempt to arrange a fair meeting on neutral ground with no recording devices present. Then, when the media hounds you, to refer them to the victim for any further public statements pending the resolution of any potential litigation.

I've emphasized that to young women who were physically or verbally assaulted by scouts or scouters (or if they were guarding a public pool). They do not ... no ... they must not countenance such behavior. They can accept whatever apology, but it's their bosses (and ours, if it's our scouts causing trouble) responsibility to act on their behalf. It's been very hard to convince them to press the issues. They don't want to do it. But at the very least, I wanted to let them know that someone's in there court for when they do.

Edited December 12, 2019 by qwazse

[ParkMan]

1 hour ago, qwazse said:

@TMSM, he "apologized" after he was caught. Then he got behind a camera to justify his actions. Probably because someone told him that was what you do to try and save your job. That's not an apology. An apology is an attempt to arrange a fair meeting on neutral ground with no recording devices present. Then, when the media hounds you, to refer them to the victim for any further public statements pending the resolution of any potential litigation.

I tend to agree.  When I watched the video, it surely didn't look like an accident.  It looked like he was thinking "hey, let's goof on this reporter." I agree - apologize in private.  In pubic, I would much rather hear him own up to his actions and then accept the consequences that come from it.  Make clear his contrition, but don't try to weasel his way out of it by minimizing it.  

Edited December 12, 2019 by ParkMan
clarified a thought

[TMSM]

1 hour ago, qwazse said:

@TMSM, he "apologized" after he was caught.

Sorry but I don't think there is any laws on how to apologize. He did apologize gave a good explaination of why it was wrong. I just think it makes you a better person when you accept someones apology and not have a specific conditions on it.

Forgiving is not saying what happened was acceptable, its acknowledging that the person feels bad, learned his lesson, taught others and allowing yourself move on. Thats how you regain your power.