Being Friendly and Courteous Can be hard at times

[Eagle94-A1]

Bear with me as this is a vent.

So you all know that I have left a troop because it has been slowing turning into adult led for some time, especially over the past 18 months when two new Scouts, and their families, joined. What they  did at camporee and the attitudes they had was the last straw. Well I am the only registered MBC for one MB and I started it with the troop last year. No one has finished it yet, except for my 2 sons and I am NOT going to sign off on them without anyone else getting it. And even then, I want them to talk a little about it with someone else so that it is verified I am not giving them the MB.

Anyway, one of the families has been pushing for their son to complete it. First I told them He needs to contact me to schedule. When he finally talks to me, I told him to bring his calendar and we can set up some dates to finish it.  2 months pass and again He come up to me to finish  it, and I told him again I need dates to finish it with him. 2 more months pass and I remind him that if he want the MB, he needs to set up some sessions with me. After it was announced I was leaving, dad forces son to talk to me again. I set up an appointment.

Well life happens. I am going on a 2 week trip, and I still have not packed for it. Between work, Scouts, and baseball, it's been crazy. Then on top of that, one of my Eagles, whom I have not seen in 20 years, will be passing though my town and is coming to see me this weekend. In fact he is due in any minute. I sent a message that I will need to reschedule in December, which is when I will be back.

Mom is ticked off. States that he doesn't want to wait until December and who else can sign off. Told her I do not know of anyone else and what is the rush.  FYI, he is a 12 year old Second Class Scout. Told there is no rush, but "we've been working on it" for over a year. I then reminded her that things happen, and I told him to contact me sooner. Also mentioned how one son has been waiting since December to finish it too, and my oldest has been waiting 4 years to finish it as the original MBC passed away.

She then proceed to tell me he asked twice, but it can wait since she doesn't want to be augmentative. I politely responded, but boy was I tempted to tell her off. It was extremely hard being freindly and courteous.

[WisconsinMomma]

There are seriously NO other merit badge counselors?  Which one is it?   Pulp and Paper??  

I can understand being frustrated that a meeting was rescheduled, and a 2 week plus wait -- that is frustrating.  I can also understand how 12 year olds don't have it together organizationally and it takes multiple tries to make things happen.

I am sure that it can feel like you are delaying things like asking him to bring his calendar (who uses a paper calendar?) rather than you proposing dates that work for you, but someone has to offer dates, and make the communication.

I get frustrated sometimes when people get a little too picky about --- first you have to do this, then here's another hoop, and then this needs to be done just so.  It can be hard for kids to communicate with adults, and if the adults are not accommodating, or have road blocks, or are difficult to reach /busy schedules/slow to return calls, it's all a big pain in the backside!  This stuff can be 1) slow and 2) frustrating, and it is very hard for 12 year olds to be successful with!

So take a breath and don't get upset. Have a good trip! 

Edited November 10, 2018 by RememberSchiff
substituted upset

[Chadamus]

Meet with the Scout and have your 20 year Eagle join. He could see you in action, do a little giving back by offering words of wisdom and inspiration for the young Scout, and help you meet YPT all at once.

My $.02

[Eagle94-A1]

1 hour ago, WisconsinMomma said:

There are seriously NO other merit badge counselors?  Which one is it?   Pulp and Paper??  

I can understand being frustrated that a meeting was rescheduled, and a 2 week plus wait -- that is frustrating.  I can also understand how 12 year olds don't have it together organizationally and it takes multiple tries to make things happen.

I am sure that it can feel like you are delaying things like asking him to bring his calendar (who uses a paper calendar?) rather than you proposing dates that work for you, but someone has to offer dates, and make the communication.

I get frustrated sometimes when people get a little too picky about --- first you have to do this, then here's another hoop, and then this needs to be done just so.  It can be hard for kids to communicate with adults, and if the adults are not accommodating, or have road blocks, or are difficult to reach /busy schedules/slow to return calls, it's all a big pain in the backside!  This stuff can be 1) slow and 2) frustrating, and it is very hard for 12 year olds to be successful with!

So take a breath and don't get upset. Have a good trip! 

Actually I am the only MBC willing to work with Scouts outside of their own troop in the district. And it's Chess. I do not know why it would seem as if I am delaying things when  the dates I offer I am told do not work for them. That's why I keep asking them to bring a calendar to tell me what days work for them. Heck, when they came up to me on Monday and said they wanted to finish it, the first date I told them was not good for them. When all the dates and times I offer them do not work for them, how else am I suppose to know what is good for them?

Part of Scouting is learning time management, and it is part of Personal Management MB.  And while it can be challenging for 12 year olds to learn, it can be done if the parents allow their son to take responsibility. My 12 year old uses a paper planner, yes they still make them, and has coordinated stuff on his own. Then again I am not standing beside him  telling him what he can or cannot do. 

I can understand your frustration with roadblocks and advancement. Been there and dealt with it. One reason why as an adult I try to be as accommodating as possible. But it is also frustrating as an adult when you tell someone dates, they say do not work out for them, and then ask them to bring a calendar to schedule stuff to get it done and they do not do it. Add in an bad attitude from the parents , and you may be able to see my frustration.

Yep taking deep breaths and calming down. My Eagle showing up  is definatley  helping. And thank you for the good trip wishes. They are needed.

 

Just now, Chadamus said:

Meet with the Scout and have your 20 year Eagle join. He could see you in action, do a little giving back by offering words of wisdom and inspiration for the young Scout, and help you meet YPT all at once.

My $.02

Good idea. May do that for another Scout I am meeting with who is in a rush to finish up Personal Management. This Scout needs it ASAP so he can get Life next week. Then he has 7 months to earn Eagle. Wish I could do it for the Scout in the post above, but I need to pack that nite.