Targeting Boy with False Allegations

[NealOnWheels]

On 10/6/2018 at 6:16 AM, packsaddle said:

Hi NoW, Are you commenting about THIS website or the one linked in the original post?

The one mentioned in the first post.

[FireStone]

Heartbreaking story about the Seneca Valley boy. And the absolute failure of the school administrators to do anything about it afterward. That boy is essentially given a life sentence, he'll never be able to completely free himself of the false accusations, and his entire high school experience is forever marred by this.

Meanwhile the girls get off without even a school disciplinary measure. The boys parents hands are tied, they have to file this lawsuit, even though I suspect they really don't want to. Their son has been through so much, if it were me I'd rather the nightmare end as soon as possible. But if no one else will do anything about it, what choice do they have? 

Personally I'm glad that women feel more emboldened today to discuss real assault and abuse. I support the intent of the "Me too" movement and at the core what it aims to do. However, although "Me too" can be a force for good it can clearly also be used as a weapon against the innocent. We need to find a fair balance in all of this and ensure that what was set out as a noble movement doesn't end up doing more harm than good. 

[NJCubScouter]

On 10/5/2018 at 11:12 PM, NealOnWheels said:

I wonder how long it will be before the owners and hosts of this website are sued for defamation of character.

If you mean the news site that printed this article, it seems to me that they were very careful to keep quoting the lawsuit rather than making the statements "in their own voice."  The lawsuit contends, the lawsuit alleges, according to the lawsuit, etc. etc.  As long as the lawuit does say those things, the statements in the article are not false, regardless of whether the statements in the lawsuit itself are false.  

Edited October 8, 2018 by NJCubScouter

[NealOnWheels]

Sorry for the confusion.  I was referring to the website described in the news article in the fourth post (clear as mud?).

This website: http://www.makethemscared.com/

Seems to me they are putting themselves at risk.  And the host (Google) could be at risk if they know the nature of the website.

[perdidochas]

On 10/5/2018 at 1:25 PM, scoutldr said:

I have been married going on 44 years.  My wife once asked me "if something happens to me, would you find someone else?"  My immediate response now would be "hell no!"  She has some "liberal feminist" friends who behave worse than any of my horndog male buddies ever did but are staunchly in favor of hanging Kavanaugh out to dry.  Why would I risk subjecting myself to that?  Ladies, I'm afraid you've "screwed the pooch" this time...so take your pink hats and leave me alone.

I've only been married almost half the length you have been, but I do agree with you.  I have no intention of remarrying should my wife pass away first. 

[swilliams]

My boys are still on the young side, 12 and 10, so I've not brought this up.  It's too tempting to stick my head in the sand, rather than try to wade into the murk that is the current #metoo.  It's sad to think that it's no longer enough to talk to them about treating girls with respect, but to have to add in precautions about making sure they can't be accused of inappropriate behavior.

As for my daughters, one was groped in the hallway of middle school - early 2000's, plenty of witnesses.  She immediately went to the school director, told him what had happened and pointed out the boy, who ended up being suspended for three days.  When he came back to school, he was determined to exact revenge.  Being in NYC, the school building didn't have room for the 7th and 8th grade kids to eat lunch in the cafeteria, so they were allowed out for lunch.  He followed her and a group of friends to the local deli, pushed their food off the table, then shoved my daughter into the street as she was walking back to school.  Luckily the oncoming car was able to brake in time.  While you never want a girl to feel she can't speak up, it never occurred to her that she would end up in a far more difficult situation because of it, and she expressed frustration and some regret for having come forward.

What an awful, muddled mess.  Can we just separate them all until they're in their 20's?

[fred johnson]

On 10/13/2018 at 7:49 PM, swilliams said:

My boys are still on the young side, 12 and 10, so I've not brought this up.  It's too tempting to stick my head in the sand, rather than try to wade into the murk that is the current #metoo.  It's sad to think that it's no longer enough to talk to them about treating girls with respect, but to have to add in precautions about making sure they can't be accused of inappropriate behavior.

As for my daughters, one was groped in the hallway of middle school - early 2000's, plenty of witnesses.  She immediately went to the school director, told him what had happened and pointed out the boy, who ended up being suspended for three days.  When he came back to school, he was determined to exact revenge.  Being in NYC, the school building didn't have room for the 7th and 8th grade kids to eat lunch in the cafeteria, so they were allowed out for lunch.  He followed her and a group of friends to the local deli, pushed their food off the table, then shoved my daughter into the street as she was walking back to school.  Luckily the oncoming car was able to brake in time.  While you never want a girl to feel she can't speak up, it never occurred to her that she would end up in a far more difficult situation because of it, and she expressed frustration and some regret for having come forward.

 What an awful, muddled mess.  Can we just separate them all until they're in their 20's?

I pray that incidents like your daughter experienced NEVER cause people to avoid reporting.  Did your daughter report this follow-on incident?  Did her friends?  I'd hope he was expelled, was charged and faced juvenile court punishments.   

Reporting is critical.  I fully believe future victims are created by not reporting.  The most visible example of this is Harvey Weinstein's 87 victims over 30+ years.  If early victims would have spoke up, perhaps 50 or 60  or 70 fewer victims would have been created.  

[WisconsinMomma]

Bystanders are also important in helping prevention.  The new YPT training helps with this a lot.