Sloooooow advancement

[bearess]

My son crossed over to Boy Scouts last November.  He finally got his Scout rank in May.  He’s not made any advancement progress since— I just looked at his handbook and he has three things on Tenderfoot signed off.  He’s active in his Troop— they have about one camping weekend a month, which he attends.  He’s going to camp, and the next week going on a week long camping trip, including three days/two nights of canoeing.  He enjoys Scouts.  I think he’s done most of the Tenderfoot (and some second class) requirements, but he’s completely unmotivated to get them signed off on.  He’s also, for some reason, very unwilling to do a Scoutmaster conference.  It took him 2-3 months to ask for one for Scout.  His scoutmaster is perfectly nice, unintimidating, and I think my son likes him.  But for some reason the idea of a conference is a no go!

So, to sum it up, son has been active in Boy Scouts for nearly a year.  He’s gotten Scout rank, and no merit badges, mainly due to his lack of follow through.  I don’t really care— he obviously doesn’t!  Is there a reason I should care?  Would you push him to do advance a bit more?  He’s a very mellow kid, and if I told him to step it up, he would.

[Eagledad]

You may be surprised to learn that your son is average. Boys his age want adventure. They would rather not waste time with the boring administrative stuff. 

I'm not sure what advice to suggest because a lot depends on his program and how they value advancement in the program. We don't push our  scouts either, but we do try to guide the to some small responsibilities where they have to set small goals and make plans to reach those goals. Our approach is for the scout develop habits that will lead him later to work his advancement at his pace.

I would not worry about it for another few months because he is having fun. The only reason I would have any concern is we want the scouts to learn the skills of surviving in the woods. But you said he seems to be doing the requirements, he just hasn't done he boring admin stuff. Let him have his fun and see how it goes. See how the troop handles it, or if they handle it. And when you are tempted to ask about it, ask him about what he is learning instead of going directly to rank. He might be more excited to talk about that, and you can measure if he is growing in the program. Trust me, he has plenty of time to catch up. Keeping him in the program because he likes it is a lot more important at this stage of his troop experience.

Has he set up his tent on a dark rainy night? That is pretty cool stuff.

Barry

[Jameson76]

Let him choose his path.  We have some that are very fired up about advancement.  We have some that enjoy the adventure and challenge of the outings.  Sometimes as leaders we ask those that have not advanced a rack in a while if they have any questions, but that's about it.

Don't worry, unless he is 17 and 7 months, wants to attain Eagle and still has some required MB to earn.  (and a project)  He may be a might stressed then

[qwazse]

44 minutes ago, bearess said:

... He enjoys Scouts. ...

Success!!!!!

[shortridge]

Can you tell if this is typical for his cohort or patrol? Perhaps the troop just doesn’t put a huge emphasis on advancement in the first year. And that’s OK.

I wouldn’t worry about it too much, nor would I be pushing him. As he matures, conversations with adults will become easier. He’ll also see his fellow Scouts advancing, and that perhaps will spur him to get his stuff together so he’s not left behind. If he’s mastering his skills and having fun in the outdoors with his friends, let him be a Scout for a while!

[MattR]

2 hours ago, bearess said:

So, to sum it up, son has been active in Boy Scouts for nearly a year.  He’s gotten Scout rank, and no merit badges, mainly due to his lack of follow through.  I don’t really care— he obviously doesn’t!  Is there a reason I should care?  Would you push him to do advance a bit more?  He’s a very mellow kid, and if I told him to step it up, he would.

Sounds like my son. Very mellow. Was having fun. He was a year or so in and I sat down with him and showed him how easy it was to get things signed off. It was not on his radar. He was finally mature enough. He suddenly got two ranks at one COH. He still didn't get eagle until two months before his 18th birthday. What he enjoyed about scouts was the adventure and friendships. That has stuck with him. His dog has now been up more peaks over 14,000' than I have.

I wouldn't tell him what to do. However, you could ask him what he wants to do in scouts and then support him. If he says he wants to advance then talk to him about that. But if he says he wants to go on next year's big adventure and needs to raise money, then help him with that. And if he says he just wants to have fun with his friends then maybe he'd be interested in having his patrol come over to shoot hoops in the driveway and eat ice cream.

[bearess]

Thanks for the advice.  I think you’re right, give it time, and then a reminder.  The older boys/PLs are the ones who sign off on advancement/skills (with the exception of Scout masters conference and, I assume, BOR).  I think that he just doesn’t think to ask about it.

Anyway, he’s off to summer camp today, where he’s doing a first class adventure program.  So......we shall see!

[Cubmaster Pete]

He is doing fine. No real shock there, and if he enjoys scouts and is having fun, that's all you really want.

I turned in all my Eagle paperwork and had my EBOR just a week before my 18th birthday. It's not because I was unmotivated, I was just having too much fun and enjoying scouting in the interim.

Each scout chooses his own path.....

[wdfa89]

IMO he is not sloooooow at all.  I am sure there are some faster, but I have boys who have been in the troop a couple years + who are still Scout or TF.  They are happy and coming to events.  all good.

he is doing fine.  I am an advancement chair and I see this quite a bit.  It is a big adjustment, IMO, from Cubs where the parents/leaders make sure everything is signed off and the program runs on basically a syllabus to boy scouts where the boy needs to drive the accomplishment, and bring his book around (which means having the book, knowing what needs to get signed, and then getting it signed)  it can take a year or so before they find their rhythm on that.  Then it can go like gangbusters.  Sometimes it takes motivation, like seeing all the cool stuff that only 1C and above are eligible for, or a couple buddies make rank.  or they just enjoy the activities and fellowship and that is enough.  as someone already said they all move at their own pace and define their own journey.

now that doesn't mean every now and again you can't talk to him and ask how is it going, and, if he is interested talk about getting stuff signed off (for ex, my son did want to advance but sometimes needed a gentle reminder about what he did on the campout or who he might see at a meeting to get stuff signed--but arms, or farther, length direction--more about helping him learn the procedures then specifically directing actions)

Edited July 24, 2018 by wdfa89

[perdidochas]

On 7/19/2018 at 11:18 AM, bearess said:

My son crossed over to Boy Scouts last November.  He finally got his Scout rank in May.  He’s not made any advancement progress since— I just looked at his handbook and he has three things on Tenderfoot signed off.  He’s active in his Troop— they have about one camping weekend a month, which he attends.  He’s going to camp, and the next week going on a week long camping trip, including three days/two nights of canoeing.  He enjoys Scouts.  I think he’s done most of the Tenderfoot (and some second class) requirements, but he’s completely unmotivated to get them signed off on.  He’s also, for some reason, very unwilling to do a Scoutmaster conference.  It took him 2-3 months to ask for one for Scout.  His scoutmaster is perfectly nice, unintimidating, and I think my son likes him.  But for some reason the idea of a conference is a no go!

So, to sum it up, son has been active in Boy Scouts for nearly a year.  He’s gotten Scout rank, and no merit badges, mainly due to his lack of follow through.  I don’t really care— he obviously doesn’t!  Is there a reason I should care?  Would you push him to do advance a bit more?  He’s a very mellow kid, and if I told him to step it up, he would.

In my troop, it was the responsibility of the Scout to ask the adult leader present to sign off requirements.  You need to tell him that it's his job to ask the adults for sign offs.   If he's having fun, that's the important thing.

 

Signed,

A two year Tenderfoot that never advanced beyond that point. 

Edited July 24, 2018 by perdidochas

[prof]

Remember that advancement is only one of the methods of scouting. It has a tendency to overshadow the other methods in people's minds. but as long as he is enjoying it and you believe that he is getting something out of the program, I'd say not to worry at this point.

[fred johnson]

I'm glad to see the answers in this forum.  It's the right answers.  Too often advancement overshadows the other methods of scouting.  

I would like to say though it is a balance.  Having fun and being active are the most important key points.  But it is good to not fully let advancement sit.  

• Ingraining the habits (earning MBs, doing requirements, asking for sign-offs) of advancement early is important as the scout will know what's expected.  
• Ingraining the habits early is also important so the scout realizes the satisfaction and pride from having accomplished something significant

The biggest reason to not fully ignore advancement is that sometime between 14 and 17, your scout will have done all the camp outs and it will start getting repetitive.  It's important to have a driving reason to continue and something new to explore.  

Perhaps it's my troop, but I never minded the scoutmaster (or ASM) who with a smile would ask the scout to get his handbook and sit with the scout by the campfire in the middle of the day.  Then, just chat and review what the scout has done.  If there are things he can sign off, he'd sign off.  

I really like the idea that advancement is the nature result of being active.  Sadly, too often advancement is perverted into a formal bureaucratic process that drains the life out of everyone.

If your son is active as you say, he should be advancing.  

[bearess]

Thanks so much for the feedback.  He’s at summer camp now.  Before he left, his SM told him he wanted them to sit down together and look at his advancement.  He’ll be home for a week, then the next week he’s doing a week long canoe trip with his Troop.  I think I’ll ask his SM to remind him that a lot of stuff is closed off if you aren’t first class at 14.  I suspect that will motivate him to remember to advance!

[qwazse]

1 hour ago, bearess said:

...  I think I’ll ask his SM to remind him that a lot of stuff is closed off if you aren’t first class at 14.  I suspect that will motivate him to remember to advance!

Leave your SM to do his thing. I'm sure things will work out.