New troop, big problems

[The Latin Scot]

46 minutes ago, David CO said:

That is exactly right. That's why I think your reaction is way over the top. We don't know who is at fault. We don't know if the situation is really as "toxic" as you assume. All we can do is calmly ask questions and offer advice.

The OP asks what he can/should do. Yes, he can pick his son up from camp. Yes, he can transfer to a different troop. Is that the best solution? Is that what he should do? I don't know. I don't think you know. 

I note as I reread this discussion that, in the entirety of this thread as of the moment I write this, you have not asked a single question until now (and these appear rhetorical), nor have you offered a single suggestion or word of "advice." You have only disclosed your allegations and suspicions. I would ask then, what would you like me to make of this? Should I then simply follow your counsel, counsel that you yourself have not adhered to nor demonstrated to any degree? Should I feel embarrassed by my comments? First you make strong suggestions insinuating that there must be ulterior motives behind what is going on, now you seem to backtrack and claim we "don't know who is at fault." You flip your position, or if you don't, you have not conveyed it well enough to represent your true feelings here. But I will not be vague with mine. If there is even a chance, even the most remote possibility in the world that a young person is being harmed, is it really over the top to try and do whatever it takes to see that it stops? And if so, does that matter in light of what could be at stake?

This I DO know - it is worth it to me to take that chance and say what I can if it means it might somehow, some way help a child. You can claim I don't know what's best, but I already know I don't. I find that is unimportant. I do know that the emotional well-being of a child is more important than the semantics of a discussion like this, so if I risk coming off as extreme or reactionary or alarmist, I am okay with that. I don't lose sleep over what anonymous online forum members may think of me. But I will tell you this - I do lose sleep when I don't speak up for something that matters.

So maybe we don't have all the facts. Maybe this whole thing was made up - maybe it's all one fabricated story. Does that matter? If there exists even the slimmest fraction of a possibility that that child may be in any kind of risk of being emotionally abused by an adult, I will take a stand. Make of it what you will, but please don't expect me to sit back and read about a child being mistreated and not say or suggest anything. That would be an affront to the very sanctity of youth that this entire organization exists to protect. 

And if it all turns out that this whole thing wasn't even a big deal, I will continue to stand by every comment I have made. Maybe this time it won't turn into something more serious. Can we be sure it won't be the next?

 

Edited June 14, 2018 by The Latin Scot

[Chris1]

Well said @The Latin Scot. I stand with you to protect the well-being of a child. And BSA says that is the obligation of all registered adults. 

 

[Oldscout448]

as one who received more than a little abuse both verbal and physical as a first year scout, I  view it as my obligation  registered or not.

[The Latin Scot]

I note, @David CO, that you have chosen to express your opposition with a downvote. Honestly though, I am just glad to know you have read and considered my thoughts. I am sorry you seem to disagree so strongly with my feelings, but a Scout is brave, so I as a Scout have to stand up for what I believe is right even in the face of opposition - or downvotes. I hope this does not cause you to resent my presence here, and please know that I have nothing but respect for you and your opinions insofar as they protect the safety of others. But there exists the possibility that a child's well-being is at risk here - isn't that more important than the petty disagreements of two online forum members?

Edited June 14, 2018 by The Latin Scot

[MattR]

@David CO and @The Latin Scot, I've sent you both a PM.
 

[The Latin Scot]

My apologies to all for getting so excited by this subject; I have let my zeal over-rule my discretion, and I am sorry for making a scene on this thread. I will do my best to exercise more restraint in the future, and will not badger this thread anymore with my crusade-parade. I apologize especially to @Scoutinglife - I hope this didn't scare you off the forum! This is NOT a normal incident, and the fault is mine. I hope you stay with us!

EDIT: Also, thank you @MattR for the kind reminder to keep my thoughts in check. I am grateful to have moderators here who are so diligent in keeping this forum civil and on-topic. 

Edited June 14, 2018 by The Latin Scot

[David CO]

I understand the difficulties of starting a new unit. When I started a unit (many years ago), my #1 priority was to secure a skilled high school aged scout to be our first SPL. BSA doesn't require it, but I think they should. You can't start out a troop in the right direction (using the patrol method) if you don't have even one single scout who knows what he is doing. A good SPL is an essential for a new troop.

If a high school aged SPL told a young scout to get up off his ass, nobody would have complained about the language. The boy would have been pleased that a high school guy was willing to talk to him at all.

 

[David CO]

13 hours ago, Oldscout448 said:

received more than a little abuse both verbal and physical as a first year scout

So did I. Only I got it from other scouts, so I didn't really mind. 

Besides, scouting was like a church picnic compared to football.

 

Edited June 14, 2018 by David CO

[David CO]

22 hours ago, NJCubScouter said:

Verbal abuse of Scouts by leaders is not permitted.

NJ, I am telling you no lie. When I coached my first baseball team, a small group of players and parents went to the YMCA director to complain about me because I never yelled, used profanity, or told dirty jokes in the locker room (like other coaches did). The boys felt they were missing out on some of the "forbidden fruit" that they expected in a sports program. They felt that this sort of behavior was part of the excitement of being on a big boy team, and they had eagerly anticipated it.

 

Edited June 14, 2018 by David CO

[Chris1]

3 hours ago, David CO said:

NJ, I am telling you no lie. When I coached my first baseball team, a small group of players and parents went to the YMCA director to complain about me because I never yelled, used profanity, or told dirty jokes in the locker room (like other coaches did). The boys felt they were missing out on some of the "forbidden fruit" that they expected in a sports program. They felt that this sort of behavior was part of the excitement of being on a big boy team, and they had eagerly anticipated it.

 

I don't see how your baseball coach experience has anything to do with scouting. 

Take the new "Youth on Youth Abuse Prevention" Training. It is quite clear that what was acceptable in the past may no longer be permitted. It is a really good course.