standerson Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Venting somewhat here. Was at a adult meeting discussing upcoming events. Members of our Venture Crew were in attendance. A 16 year old female said and adult (early 20's) had touched her inappropriately. That immediately prompted calls to the unit commissioner then the district commissioner then the scout exec. It has turned into a full blown Scout and police investigation. Parents worst nightmare. It's also our daughter. I am working with the local police to complete a thorough, fair and low key investigation. The Council has been wonderful. They have offered our daughter any and all help she may need. I am taking time off work to deal with this. She is holding up but there are a few cracks in the foundation. Thanks for listening. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwazse Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 I'm so sorry. Be proud of your daughter for speaking up. It sounds like you have sufficient depth in leadership that she'll have a safe place to go. You all will soon know if you've stopped something before got worse, or if this is just the tip of the iceberg. Either way, it's best this sees the light of day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andysmom Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Wow! I second what qwazse said. She is brave for saying something for sure and she will need support. Will keep you all in my prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sentinel947 Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 I'm sorry something like this happened. I'll keep your family in my thoughts. Let us know if there's something we can do. Sentinel947 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle94-A1 Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Thoughts and prayers are with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
standerson Posted March 3, 2015 Author Share Posted March 3, 2015 Thanks for the thoughts. She got up to go to school today and is showing the strain. The deification is about to hit the oscillation. We asked before we went anywhere is she was in for the long haul and what to expect. She said yes. She chose to talk to the Scout Exec in person vice over the phone. Again, thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
standerson Posted March 3, 2015 Author Share Posted March 3, 2015 She cracked today at school and I had to pick her up. She went to her bedroom and curled up with our German Shepherd. He is at the end of the bed, facing the door, guarding her. I am sick to my stomach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stosh Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Get her to counseling. Just like any other injury. If she broke her leg you wouldn't hesitate to get to the ER. Well, quit hesitating. There are a ton of helping programs out there. You can't help her anymore than you can set a broken leg. She needs you to help! Be there for her. Stosh 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwazse Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Ditto on the counseling. If there are any issues with getting her scheduled quickly, call the SE (or whoever he may have already told you is the go-to guy for support). Our directer of field service was very helpful in fast-tracking our scouts when they needed help. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
standerson Posted March 3, 2015 Author Share Posted March 3, 2015 Her priest will be over later this afternoon to talk to her. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stosh Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 I don't want this to be taken the wrong way, but this is going to take a lot more than a priest to get her through. I am an ordained minister and in this case my role would be to drive her and her parents to specific specialty professional counselors who work with people in this situation every day of the week all day long. There is a parental component in this, there is a spiritual component in this but there is a critical emotional component in this that neither you nor the priest are in a position to help other than getting her there. So, as politely and respectfully as I can make it. Get off the computer, look in the front of the phone book, they sometimes have a number to call, "First call for Help" hotline kinda thing, find a place call them that you're coming, go to your daughter, take her by the hand and go for a short ride to a place that can help her. Then call the priest and have him meet you there. I would want my daughter to think me over reactive, overly concerned parent than I would want her to think the only protective thing between her and the world is a German Shepherd. Stosh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RememberSchiff Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Seek legal advice from a reputable personal injury attorney. Depending on the facts and which court and which state, you may possibly obtain a restraining order. Different states have different names, e.g., a civil harassment order (civil court) or a criminal protection order (criminal). Agree with Stosh, seek expert counseling from experts. My $0.01 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
standerson Posted March 3, 2015 Author Share Posted March 3, 2015 Sosh; Yes I find your post offensive. The best way to get her to clam up is to take her to someone she doesn't know and has no history with to discuss this. She is at ease with the priest, The priest if a professional counselor. He will get her to the point where she will open up to a professional counselor. This has to be done in steps to be successful. You seem to think I'm sitting in front of a computer and doing nothing else. You are sadly mistaken. There are a lot of wheels in motion. I came her to vent, I'm out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJCubScouter Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 standerson, I hope you are still reading this. Everybody here is just trying to help. Some here have been through experiences like this and are just trying to share what they have seen work and not work. But what works for one person may not work best for another. Nobody here (except you) knows your daughter and what she will and won't respond to. I cannot really add anything substantive. I will just wish you and your daughter the best in getting through this. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stosh Posted March 4, 2015 Share Posted March 4, 2015 Sorry you feel that way. Please accept my apology. All I can say is I speak from experience of sitting on both sides of the table. I wish only the best for your daughter. Stosh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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