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Scout with Poor Grades


hondaman

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From what you're describing you have a sudden change in behaviors compared to the past. Someone who has done well in school for the first two years of high school but suddenly is failing and is expressing a new very negative attitude is waving a big red flag. My suspicion would be that this is not about better organizing his folders or spending too much time on extra-curricular activities, honestly by today's standards for a middle class kid just band and scouts is not a lot of extras. I would have a professional mental health professional have a few talks with him to see if there is something deeper going on.

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You seem to suggest that his calling people that he disagrees with, his "enemys", communists is also something new. Did that start when his grades started to slip? His math, foreign language and chemistry teachers - how are they different from his other teachers? Are they minorities? Liberals? Not church goers?

 

This may not be just a behavioral change - this may also include a personality change (and yes, those are different though often occurring together). I'd suggest the first thing you do is talk to the parents and see if they've noticed any significant chnages at home - it's not uncommon for parents to see changes and mark it down to "being a teenager" - sometimes it takes an outsider to point out that some changes are far to radical to be ignored. If you've know him a while, you might be in a position to suggest that he be evaluated by a medical doctor and a psychiatrist - with a change so radical, there can be a lot of things that could account for it - from drugs and alcohol and changes in friends, to having suffered a trauma (did he lose someone close to him recently, fall off his bike and smacked his head, or has he become secretive about something that might suggest some kind of abuse), to having an undiagnosed mental health issue, to having an undiagnosed medical condition (has he complained of headaches recently where he hasn't had them before?).

 

 

This may very well be something that is beyond just taking time out of Scouting or Band or Church. Something that is beyond schoolwork organizing and tutoring. Don't try to fix this on your own. This is something the parents need to be fully engaged in.

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Once again, thanks to everyone for the responses.

 

I had a talk with his parents, especially since he couldn't make it to his session on Tuesday. I saw him Friday instead.

 

Evidently, the "communist" remarks are nothing new. He has been using them on politicians he doesn't like for years, or at least as long as he's known much about politics (I'm guessing either the 2008 or 2012 election).

 

I talked to both his mother and to him, and the main issue is that he despises his math teacher, more than I had even thought. He feels she is "incompetent" and "can't teach". The same opinion is true of the other teachers he doesn't like. Through this point in his schooling, he has typically gotten along fine with teachers and has been lucky enough to have had some good ones. The bad teachers are something new for him outside of one science teacher he had years ago, and evidently he made similar remarks about her.

 

He does have some motivational issues, which is something I've known since day one working with him, but I think they have gotten more severe because of the presence of teachers he doesn't like.

 

I talked with him about effort and he has said he truly does want to do well. After a bit of a motivational talk on Friday, we had a very good math session. He actually wanted practice problems to work on and was more than willing to take a practice quiz I had developed for him (which he did very well with, I should add). At the end of the session, he said he had gotten a lot out of the session despite not knowing half the concepts going into things. He did pick up very quickly and said that he would rather work with me than with his teacher since he felt I explained things much better.

 

This isn't the first time I've gotten that remark from someone at his school. I tutor another student who takes the same class and she said the same thing to me. This other student had asked me if she could bring her friends to a session sometime as well since there are many students struggling in that class. However, she was much more respectful of her teacher than the young man I have previously described.

 

The job at the church he has taken seems to be eating away at his free time quite a bit. In fact, I saw him working this morning and he looked a little bit tired. If his grades continue to suffer, I think the parents and I will have a talk about the job (which he doesn't mind; he had some positive things to say about it).

 

Throughout the session, I gave him a lot of praise for doing things right. I didn't want to dwell on the issues with the teacher and instead focused on the content. I will see him again on Tuesday and will probably get a few words in about respecting the teacher now that I let him vent a bit to me about her. I'm going to use both the Scouting concepts brought up earlier plus a bit of Biblical principle, especially since this week's sermon at church had a bit about caring for everyone, even those we don't like.

 

I appreciate everyone's concern for this young man. I also have enjoyed my time on this forum so far and may have to check out the other forums, especially since I just read about some major changes coming to Cub Scouts and feel I should be informed since I have a few younger boys as well, a few of whom I've recommended Cub Scouting to over the past few years.

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