Dealing with SM burnout (warning: rant/vent)

[dfscott]

I'm the SM of a 2 year old troop. Our troop has been growing rapidly over the past 2 years, going from 6 scouts to 13 scouts in the 2nd year and now up to 22. We've been adding more adult leaders, but most are volunteers in name only and they're not contributing at the level we need. Our existing volunteers (i.e., me) are starting to burn out, and I don't see anyone stepping in to fill the gap. As a result, I fear the day is coming when we're going to crash and burn.

 

A little background: when my wife and I started this troop it was just the two of us (she served as both COR and CC) and a family friend who was an experienced Cub Leader and huge fan of camping. Our oldest scout was 12, so a lot of the activities were adult-led. As a result, things ran very smoothly.

 

Next we moved to the point where we had a fully functioning PLC, but things were not running smoothly anymore. I felt that this was a good thing, since it means the boys are taking more responsibility (and making more mistakes). However, this caused tons of conflict between myself and my wife and the ASM, who want everything to run like a swiss watch. It escalated to the point where she decided to step back as CC and only be COR, so we'd have a "referee." This worked okay, but after a few weeks of engagement, the new CC hasn't really done anything (I think they've only had one TC meeting this year). So, anything that needs to get done, I end up doing or it doesn't get done.

 

On the direct contact leader side, we've had great luck getting new ASMs: we now have a total of 4. However, 1 of them does not like to camp at all and can rarely make meetings. Another ASM is a great guy, but he's over-committed -- he has a prior connection with both the Girl Scouts and OA, so he has camping commitments with both of those groups, plus he and his wife are are AT section hikers, so he's only available for one or two camp outs a year. When he's there, he's great, but he's not around much. My 4th ASM is an eagle and loves to camp, but his job keeps him on the road a lot, so I can only count on him for about 1 campout/year.

 

As a result, it's back to me and my 1st ASM doing all the outings. It wasn't so bad when were were small, but with 20+ scouts now, it gets exhausting. I've tried to ask some of the parents to come along, but the COR (also my wife) pushed back on that and wants our ASMs to "step up." Of course they say, "yeah, yeah, we'll starting coming as soon as (fill-in excuse here)" but it never happens.

 

I'm leaning towards "firing" the ones that aren't adding value (I can do that, right?) and replacing them with ASMs that actually contribute before I go off the deep end (of course, I have no idea whee these new ASMs will come from). Does anyone have any thoughts or experiences with this situation? And just to clarify: I love being a SM and working with the boys -- I just can't do it all...

[Eagledad]

There are lots of ways to deal with this, but I have found that once burn out starts, it's hard to stop. Why do you feel you have to fire ASMs to bring more in? Just bring more ASMs in. Consider, annoucing that you are retiring in one year to take of CC and need to train the replacement. As a CC you can still have some control to support the program you started. Barry

[Tampa Turtle]

Speaking as an ASM that has worked closely with four SM's it looks like a hard as hell job. Thus so I don't get picked next I back up the HELL the SM as much as I can (and my wife will allow). I think the ASM's should be committing to at least 2-3 campouts a year, On the other hand an ASM who only shows up at meetings still can be useful. I would consider leaning harder on some of the Dad's not going and consider opening up to the Mom's.

 

I'd also consider going up one on one to ask people for help.

 

We have a pretty big Troop but do not have enough new help in the pipeline. So we are considering handing out a sheet to all the parents and making them sign up for a job. The smart ones will grab jobs like popcorn or committee first. EVERYONE should be contributing something...

[dg98adams]

Your COR/CC is the person(s) to decide on leadership roles. Putting one of those roles in with SM in the same family can become a red flag (Speaking as a Unit Commissioner myself) because as you have found out it can become too much work.

 

You have to draw a line in the sand and dig in.... "I need 2 adults (prefer trained) for this X outing.... or we cannot go. This should be done with enough notice, info your PLC (youth meeting) so they know and your TC Meeting (gotta have them).

 

Getting leaders is tough for everybody, but if you waffle on "what is needed" by "filling the void" all the time you will run yourself ragged.

 

Sounds like you also need a more committed CC. Has he been trained? Running the TC meeting is his job... if he can't do it your COR has to find someone else, or an assistant for him to fill in.

 

The best troops I Commission for have an active Comm. Meeting, where they really support the activities of the Troop thru communication, and constant leadership planning - and managing the fundraisers/calender to fit the Troops needs.

 

Good Luck

[koolaidman]

Dang dfscott, I feel like I'm going through the exact same thing you are, albeit I am an ASM and not SM.

 

Currently we are investing time in training our CC and we are 85% of the way there recruiting another solid ASM.

 

My idea for you is once you have an annual plan from your PLC, create a calendar of campouts, present it to the committee, or CC if a meeting is not happening, explain where you need volunteers. If they don't commit, the camp out gets axed. No hard feelings, dems da breaks.

 

If you aren't able to "fire" your ASM's you sure as heck can tell them what to do. That's their job, to back you up. So maybe their job is to sit in a corner or research a topic for you....or..... have a heart to heart and say, you know, right now, we really need help on the committee.

 

I am putting together a series of training nights for our committee and parents covering, what is boy led, how do we camp, etc etc. Our vision is to even have periodic parent meetings, maybe even roundtable style, to facilitate communication and help keep the parents off the SM's back. Hopefully this will help to get more parents involved.

 

I hope this helps. Take a break if you need to.

 

 

 

[SM bob]

I am feel your pain. Your existing ASM's sound like they do what they can. I would get more parents (mom's and dad's) to go camping. When I need volunteers I tell my parents, "we need drivers for this campout. Please decided amongst yourself who is going to go camping with the troop this month. If no one steps up I will bring the troop into the parent room and tell then that the trip is cancelled because you all are too busy." It always works. The parents who come on trips become leaders within a year, as either committee members or ASM's. I also take 2-3 campouts off each year. I send my other children to spend the weekend with relatives. My wife and I enjoy a weekend without kids. This helps me ward off the burnout.

[dfscott]

Thanks, all. Misery loves company, so that does help a bit.

 

I have used the "nuclear option" once: I resigned, and that brought about the COR/CC split. The CC is the mother of one of my scouts and is also the wife of the local Venture Crew advisor (who is also just getting that unit off the ground). They have 4 kids so she really has her hands full. She really just needs some guidance, imo, but I feel like I'm overstepping trying to coach the TC.

 

Also, two campouts ago, my ASM couldn't go due to a sudden family emergency. I announced it a week out, but no one stepped up and we had to cancel. I expected more outcry, but it seemed that only the kids were upset. I felt bad, but there really wasn't much else to do. I think I need to start having my adults sign up for outings the same way I have the scouts sign up. If we don't have enough confirmed (not "I'll try to make it") a week ahead of time, we'll cancel.

 

TT: I like your idea of a sign-up sheet for all parents. We are planning on having a merit badge clinic in september and the TC is focused on getting parents to volunteer for that, so maybe I can piggy-back on that idea.

 

ED: I like the "retiring to CC" idea. (I would miss the camping, though...)

[Stosh]

It was mentioned that it was very much adult led at the beginning of organizing the troop. If the numbers have grown and the boy-led isn't really taking over, then yes, one will most assuredly burn out.

 

I have taken over a year to get my troop off the ground, it has 7 boys, 4 of which will be heading out next week for summer camp. We officially became a troop about a month ago. I have not sat at the scout table in a meeting for almost 3 months now. The adults sit around at their own table, jaw jack and figure out the paperwork. We did some fund raising events (of which the SM and ASM were not part of at all) and they were able to get any boy to summer camp with troop provided tents, sleeping bags and backpacks and the out-of-pocket expense for the boys was $50.

 

I did notice that these Webelos crossovers last meeting did a complete review of the equipment, schedule, menu, roster, MB and MB costs for next week's camp. My ASM and I along with the parents sat at the other table and did the behind the scenes "parent" stuff to make sure they sent their boys out the door fairly well prepared.

 

I'm a firm believer that in any volunteer organization, people burn out because they either plan it that way, paint themselves into a corner or don't pay attention along the way or any combination of them.

 

I've been at this working with kids stuff for 40+ years and haven't burned out yet. I've been accused to being lazy and relying on my committee members and my scouts too often to get things done, but never burned out.

 

It's a lot easier to have 10 people doing 10 jobs than 1 person doing 10 jobs. I just let my people know that without help, I'll just let things slide until someone steps up. Knowing that, they always step up and do a great job.

 

Stosh

[JoeBob]

Adults with busy lives need to plan way ahead.

 

So when our PLC decides their annual calendar (9 trips), the CC sends it out to all troop adults. We get volunteers to be responsible for each trip. I am blessed to have a competent former SM as CC.

 

As SM, I attend about half the trips; ASMs and parents lead all the trips; that's not my job. I co-ordinate youth leadership and make sure that the adults are getting things lined up for their trip (drivers, permits, recruiting other adults). Since we plan an annual calendar, we would never get to a week before and have to cancel.

[Hedgehog]

Put two of your ASMs in charge of the Outdoor Program. They can work with the boys to come up with the events, handle the paperwork (tour plans, reservations, etc.) and be responsible for making sure there are enough adults to drive and attend. If your current ASMs can't or won't, find a couple of new ASMs. I you do that, they now have a stake in the success of the program and you have several less responsibilities.

[Stosh]

Get more ASM's. Get more parents involved. Get the committee organized and working. Get adults. Get adults. Get more adults. This is not the magic solution to your problems. Get THE BOYS going on what it is they want. I have been SM for 5 years in two different units and have NEVER had more than one ASM help me. Of course as the need arose, parents filled in where needed, i.e. rides, backup to ASM or myself, etc. Flooding the unit with adults is not the formula to a good boy-led program. I repeat for emphasis: Get THE BOYS going on what it is they want! If the SM is spending his time looking for adult support, he isn't doing his job. If there is a need for another adult to work with the boys, tell your CC and go back and work with the boys. The committee is there to support the SM and make sure he/she has the resources to support the boys. A second adult to fulfill the 2-deep, and voila, you're done. Now get the boys going on their program.

 

A PL isn' going to burn out taking care of 7 other boys. An SPL isn't going to burn out taking care of 7 other PL's. BUT the SM WILL burn out if he figures he's going to personally handle 40-50 boys all at the same time even if he has 20 ASM's to help him. Geesh, a professionally trained teacher with 20 teaching assistants isn't going to be able to keep a handle on 40-50 boys of this age without burning out, how in the world would anyone expect the average SM to do it?

 

Stosh

 

Stosh