Eamonn Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 The count down is on. On October 1st, we lose our DE and the new one starts. After eight years of working hand in hand and becoming life long friends and at times partners in crime, there is very little that the current DE and I don't share. We met the new Chap at lunch a few weeks back. He seems like a very nice young chap. This will be his first real job since graduating. After he had left we (DE and I.) Compared notes. I found nothing wrong with him. She didn't like his wimpy handshake and his little beard. Other then that he was fine. Our District Commissioner was up at camp on the day that we had the meeting. I invited the new DE up to camp to meet the District Commissioner. I told him that he didn't need to wear a uniform. He arrived dressed casually. I done the introductions. The District Commissioner all of a sudden got really busy, doing a garbage run. I was a little upset. He just didn't want to spend any time with this new DE. Talking to Pam, our DE,she said that she had met with the District Commissioner last night and he said that he didn't like the new guy. He didn't like the little beard! The District Commissioner has a beard!! He didn't like the handshake and it seems that he was wearing a choker. I never noticed it and OJ wears one a lot, so it isn't a big deal. Pam went on to say that the new guy had called her and they were going to meet, I was welcome if I was free. She went on to say that the new DE would be looking for a house. I said that seemed a bit much for a single guy in a new area in a new job. She said that he was moving with his friend. The friend is male. We (Pam and I) both had the same thought. While I feel sure that the new guy is 100% a Scout. I am worried what will happen if the District Commissioner finds out? It seems that he just isn't willing to give this guy a chance. Not sure what I ought to do or if I should do anything. Eamonn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FScouter Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 Teach him how a successful businessman shakes hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johndaigler Posted September 1, 2004 Share Posted September 1, 2004 E- Wouldn't it be a big jump for someone to hold it against this guy because he's looking to buy a house and share expenses with a friend? Isn't it funny (or, sad!) that a few years ago we'd have been upset if he was "living with" a woman friend -- now, we're tempted to be relieved???? On the other hand, I don't like those little beards, either!!! I vote for watching and picking your spots. Everbody is going to have to learn new roles, new relationships and how to work together -- they won't do that if you start "meddling". Give them the space and respect you'd expect for yourself ---- just be ready to catch whomever falls! BTW, that would be "successful business person" . . . jd(This message has been edited by johndaigler) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob White Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 E. Your situation brings two things to mind. The first...Storming, Forming, Norming, Performing. (You know the source) The second "if life was meant to be perfect, pencils wouldn't have erasers." This from my grandfather who thought himself quite the philosopher, but then every once in while he thought he was a Frigidaire Refrigerator/Freezer too (the side by side model not the over and under). Usually in Harvest Gold. Hope this helps, BW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldGreyEagle Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 It wasn't that long ago on this forum we had a long and protracted debate on tattoes, long hair and the like. If I remember correctly there was a core of people that were of the flat opinion that tattoes were a mark of low or no charactor and long hair? Just frosting on the rebrobates cake. I am not a real fan of tattoes but the Olympics did sorta teach me something, the generation of those under 30 or so wear tattoes, they have short facial hair and they can be dedicated champions. Your commissioner needs to get over himself and give the guy a chance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eamonn Posted September 2, 2004 Author Share Posted September 2, 2004 Wise words Bob. I think part of the problem is my own mindset. As you know I had given a lot of thought to stepping down, when Pam retired. Mainly because I thought that it wouldn't be fair to the new guy that I hold such strong opinions about his boss. I thought that the poor Lad would be stuck between a rock and a hard place. The big problem with this was that I wasn't giving the new guy any credit for having any intelligence of his own. I think that within a very short time he all by himself will find out how the land lies. I had promised myself that I would be good and really try not to say too much about his boss. While losing Pam is a big blow for me. I have come to terms with it. She choose to go, and it is in her best interest. When she is gone, which she will be and there's not a thing that I can do to change that. I can sit around and cry in my tea-cup or I can do what I can for the new guy, which I hope will help the District. Two meetings with the guy is great. As I say the Lad seemed really nice. Beards come and beards go!! I am not interested in how he looks. I do hope that when needed he will present himself as a professional who works for a great organization. Like it or not he is a salesman. I was ready to do everything that could be done to get him off to a good start. Sure we would have to "Pick up sticks" to get him accepted by all the people who serve in the district. Sure I knew that after eight years of dealing with someone that they knew, liked and even loved a newbie would have his work cut out. I didn't expect it to start with one member of the key3!! I didn't expect a member of the key3 to go out of his way to find fault. As for his friend moving from where he is at to come here with him. I think it is just two young 23 year old guys having a new adventure. I don't need or want anyone reading something into something that as far as I know just isn't there. Yet I have to admit that the thought did cross my mind. And I feel bad for even thinking it. If this twit of a District Commissioner has made up his mind that this isn't going to work before we even get started, I'm worried that he will say stuff which at this time no one has any reason to believe has any truth and hurt this new Lad. Replacing the District Commissioner is an option, but his appointment runs till January. Eamonn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob White Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 Sounds to me like you have everything in perspective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdutch Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 Eamonn, What position do you hold in the district? Eric Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eamonn Posted September 2, 2004 Author Share Posted September 2, 2004 Eric, I serve as the District Chairman. Eamonn. Bob, Perspective is good, uncertainty is scary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsteele Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 Eamonn: I'll go with FScouter's advice to teach the young man a good handshake. I have a feeling that you know what I think about the rest. Unc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BadenP Posted September 2, 2004 Share Posted September 2, 2004 Eamonn, Sounds like an interesting situation. All I can say, as a former DE myself, is give him a chance to see what he sets as priorities for your district. If he does his job well, then great, if not he probably won't last long in the profession. As far as the rest that will come to light soon enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scoutldr Posted September 3, 2004 Share Posted September 3, 2004 We recently received a new DE, also. It was traumatic for some, a relief for others. To each his/her own. The guy seems nice enough, and willing to listen to us "graybeards". He is my age (50ish), single, and although an Eagle Scout, has had no other Scouter experience. I think he understands that he needs us and as long as we maintain a good working relationship, we can help him make his goals, which are our goals as well. So far, so good. My advice, give the guy a chance...and don't ask, don't tell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsteele Posted September 3, 2004 Share Posted September 3, 2004 Excellent advice. Unc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FScouter Posted September 3, 2004 Share Posted September 3, 2004 Don't ask, don't tell what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EagleInKY Posted September 3, 2004 Share Posted September 3, 2004 C'mon FS, don't act so naive. I don't agree with the "don't ask, don't tell" statement. Or at least, 1/2 of it. I agree with "don't ask", it's not your place. He doesn't work for you. However, if you were to find out something as fact, I believe you would be responsible to tell. I agree with the earlier posters. Give him a chance. Coach him on a firm handshake and other tidbits to help him along the way. Hopefully, he'll be a bright young star in the scouting movement. I've had mixed success with new DEs. The ones that don't have any scouting background seem to struggle and not last. The ones that have come up through scouting and have a true love for the program seem to turn out to be the best. Interestingly, one of the best I ever worked with, was a woman. I think she had some girl scout experience, and she group up with several brothers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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