Narraticong Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 I never thought about it, but apprently the word "Ordeal" can be a bit nerve wracking for a young Scout. I've been a Brother since 1972 and love our Order. My 12 1/2 year old son has been elected and will particpate in the Ordeal this weekend. My pride at being able to call my only son Brother, is overwhelming for me! But for him, it is another thing altogether. We have no other OA members in our young troop. So what he knows about the upcoming weekend is mostly from me. I have done my best to be honest about the work, silence, etc. But he interprets the "mystique" as "secret" and doesn't like it one bit. At first, he said he would not be a part of OA. Two other boys from the troop and one adult will also be participating in the ordeal. Now, he is going to do it, but I am sure he is terrified. I feel really bad. But I know that once he makes it through the weekend, he will be fine. I'm hopeful some of you out there can help me find the right words in these upcoming days to build his confidence going into the weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SR540Beaver Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 Tell him you are his father and ask if he trusts you? Then you PROMISE him that he has absolutely nothing to fear and will look back and smile at the thought of having been afraid. He is facing an unknown, not a monster and he will find that the unknown is part of the fun. Assure him that you wouldn't let him participate if there was anything bad involved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle92 Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 Tell him as an Arrowman that " If I can do it, ANYONE can do it" with a smile on your face and all cheerful honesty. As a father, tell him that you love him and would NEVER ask him to do anything that would hurt him. On a personal note, you lucky dog. At the March Ordeal we had three fathers welcome their sons to the Order. I cannot wait for mine to do so. Long way off for me, my oldest son has been invited to a camping trip this weekend with the pack he will be joining June 1. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John-in-KC Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 Your day is coming Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gunny2862 Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 There is a great discussion/SM Minute regarding bravery and fear at http://www.boyscouttrail.com/content/minute/afraid_and_brave-321.asp It applies in his going ahead and doing the Ordeal even though he will have to be brave long enough to realize that no one is doing any thing to hurt him at the first thing they do, nor at the second, nor at the third - then maybe it's time to relax and finish and be proud of facing his fear and doing a good job going thru the Ordeal. And along the way learning the lessons and meanings of the process. Good Luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narraticong Posted April 24, 2009 Author Share Posted April 24, 2009 Well, the day is here. We leave for the Ordeal in a couple of hours (after stopping for a big dinner). His attitude seems better and so are my nerves! Weather is good for sleeping outdoors tonight. So, I'm hopeful he'll do fine. Stayed tuned! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle92 Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 Goodluck and God bless. Keep us posted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrentAllen Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 My son was tapped out at Camporee and will be attending Ordeal next weekend (I was tapped out, as well). He's asked a few questions, but doesn't appear to be too nervouse - yet. He is a last-minute type, and may be the same with his apprehensions, so it may all hit on Thursday. We have 3 other boys attending Ordeal, all his closest friends, so that probably helps as well. Since I haven't been through Ordeal, there isn't much I can tell him, except this is part of the BSA and all falls under the Oath and Law. If you can't put a little blind trust in a program operating under those principals, then we are all wasting our time. I'm personally really looking forward to Ordeal. Hopefully we will get the same weather as this weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeBob Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 For me, Tap-Out was worse than Ordeal. My shoulder hurt for a few hours. Do they still break the arrow on you? The solitude part of Ordeal was refreshing and quiet. If you have enough scouting qualities in you to win election from your troop, Ordeal merely gives you an opportunity to practice those qualities and grow more comfortable with yourself. Anticipation is justified, worry is wasted. ;^) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narraticong Posted April 27, 2009 Author Share Posted April 27, 2009 Hurray! There is a new Ordeal Brother in our family. My son made it through the weekend just fine. They had a perfect night to spend outside. He and his buddies spent all day Saturday splitting and stacking firewood. I did get to see him a couple of times in passing as I was moving and setting up picnic tables. I never saw him eat so much as he did at dinner Saturday night! I think somewhere during the weekend he got hooked. Along with his new lodge flap, book, and sash, he is the proud owner of a lodge t-shirt and knit cap. All of which were proudly shown off to his Mom Sunday night. We have Section Conclave this weekend and he asked if we could go. So I think that is a good sign! Thirty seven years after I went through my own Ordeal, it was a very touching weekend for this old guy to welcome my son as a Brother. I am glad there was a bit of rainfall at the end of the ceremony to cover the tears that were in my eyes. Sice he joined Scouting, I have been determined that his journey be his own. But it is kind of special when his path comes alongside my own. Thanks to all who offered words of encouragement during this past week and my nervousness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle92 Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 Again all I have to say is; YOU LUCKY DOG ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imasoonerfan Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 I can feel your son's pain. I will go through Ordeal next month. I have a pretty good idea what to expect but there is still some unknown. My biggest angst is the fine Oklahoma Weather. On the bright side my wife will be going through at the same time. She has NO idea what to expect and is as nervous as they come. To top it all off the first night is our 16th anniversary. Our Scoutmaster told us after the callout that we will make it one more year married since we will not spend our anniversay together or speaking to one another. He thinks he is funny. My oldest was not elected and is pretty down that both Mom and Dad will be going through before him. I just keep reminding him that his day is coming and he will appreciate it more if/when he does get elected. I wanted to go through Ordeal 'with' him but now I get to be on the other side to welcome him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regi Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 Narraticong congratulations to our new brother Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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