Missing fundraising money

[NancyB]

My son was signed up for jamboree by my ex without my consent. Ex was scoutmaster and his GF was asst. The reasons for divorce were his physical abuse of our son and his affairs with other married scout leaders (including current GF). On the advice of the dept. of human services who investigated the abuse (the bsa's failure to abide by the two deep rule was very concerning since his father had gotten out of line with him at past scouting events), I pulled my son out of jamboree and explained my reasons to him the local council and the Omaha council. I also asked that the money that he had raised be transferred to his scout account with his troop so that he could apply them toward high adventure and other boy scout activities. Several months later, still no money. I have been harassed by the BSA b/c I dared to open my mouth about the abuse and the affairs and other issues. He is now claiming that our son never participated in a single fundraising activity and there is no money. This is going to be litigated in court next week in a contempt case (he is still refusing after a year to provide complete ins. coverage for his son). So now my son will have to testify as will the other boys who were involved in the fundraiser. I have parents who are upset that their children will have to be subpoenaed to testify. granted, it's only 300 dollars, but my son sold water at a parade during 100 degree heat and worked hard. It is not fair for the adults to take his money, esp. a BSA leader.

 

Any thoughts on how to resolve this? I really don't want to have to go to court on it but I can't tell my son to forget about the money. And yes, this is the same leader that the BSA has refused/failed to investigate for abuse for over a year. This is also the leader who still has property belonging to my son's troop (computer programs, health forms of the boys etc etc and other forms with private info) that he refuses to return. I am completetly frustrated by the BSA's failure to step in and do something/anything. At this point, I am considering filing a criminal complaint against the leaders of the jamboree troop. I would think that the BSA wouldn't want this publicity, but I will not let my son continue to be treated with such disrespect by the BSA.

 

If anyone has any idea where I can go above the Omaha council I would appreciate it, b/c they have been covering for him for years.

[Eamonn]

I love my brother very dearly.

I also liked his ex.

In fact the last time I was in England, I took her to dinner.

But when they were going through their divorce, I was very careful not to get involved or choose sides.

I kinda feel the same way about this thread.

Eamonn.

 

[boomerscout]

I am seeing "my son" and "his son"; I am not seeing "our son". Did either of you stop and ask the kid if he wanted to go to the Jamboree -- possibly with a different troop?

[Basementdweller]

A shame about the fund raising $$$$. Fund raising is a unit specific thing. In our unit we have a policy that each parent who wishes their scout to participate must sign. Our unit does transfer the funds in the scouts name to the new troop or pack.

 

I assume he is the boys natural/genetic Father. Youth protection really doesn't apply to natural genetic parents as leaders. You can sleep in the same tent as your son. Drive to meetings with him alone in the car.

 

I don't think Youth Protection ever had the intent of protecting a scout from his natural parents.

 

Now if you had a protection order that is a different story.

 

 

I understand that the parents are mad at you. So for $300 how many lives are you impacting???? How many parents are taking off work? how many scouts are being taken out of school???

 

 

 

[Twocubdad]

If this is going to court next week, I'm not sure why you're posting here. These things should have been decided with your attorney months ago. You should be discussing this with him or her. Sounds like this ceased to be an issue for Scouters to discuss some time ago.

 

And for the same reason I would assume the Council leadership has been instructed by their attorney to have no contact with you. If there is any settlement to be made -- even if your son is clearly owed the $300 -- it will be handled through the attorneys.

[NancyB]

Our son wanted to go but with another troop b/c he is afraid of his dad. DHS told me not to let him go b/c of pending investigations. BSA has been aware of this problem. So far, 3 divorces b/c of his behavior. One troop has kicked him and GF out. I tried to transfer our son to another troop, but that leader didn't want his father involved with his troop b/c he had concerns about his behavior also. I have a child who wants to be in scouts.

 

If BSA had done their job and investigated him when the complaints were made, it would have been resolved a very long time ago. Our son wants to continue in scouts, but it is hard for me to take him when the other boys harass him about his dad being there. He has been harassed b/c his father was not discreet at all about his relationship with other married women. This leader has been allowed to continue his behavior with no consequences. We now have troop property missing. The troop has had to spend its own money to replace the property. I settled the original divorce to avoid having our son and the other scouts from testifying and he is taking me back to court yet again. Other parents are making complaints to the council about his behavior also. They are also being ignored. Other parents have gone so far as stating that they will remove their boys if the council doesn't do something. Another troop took action to remove him from their leadership b/c of his behavior. OUr council is too worried about a leader who has donated a bunch of money to worry about the boys. It's a very sad situation.

 

I think I will let the police handle this since it is clear from several of those on this forum seem to think that I should close my eyes to a scout leader causing a scout's hard earned money to disappear. Would the BSA like to explain to our child that he can't go on high adventure b/c his money has disappeared? Why is BSA protecting the guilty?

 

Did anyone stop to consider that it is this type of behavior that is the cause of the lawsuit out in Oregon??? BSA can have all the policies it wants, but if it doesn't follow them, then it's going to be getting a lot more law suits.

[Nike]

It is quite apparent that you are involved in a horrid divorce and your son has my sympathies.

 

My advice would be to leave this to the attornies.

[nldscout]

I went back and read all your post to see where your comments started. In the begining it was a leader having affairs with married women, no all the sudden it has become your ex from an alldgedly nasty divorce. I say that because all we have is your side here, and from my chair it seems awful tilted.

 

If this was your ex you should have stated that in the begining, because now it sound to me like sour grapes because you didn't get what you wanted.

[frank10]

Have you thought about contacting Jerry Springer?

[ScoutNut]

Yep, 1 week ago you you were desperate to find a way to get your son to Jamboree because you did not want him to "miss out on this exciting opportunity".

 

Now, all of a sudden this was all done against your consent and you want your money back?

 

Really?

 

Way to many inconsistencies over the past 2.5 years for me to believe anything but that this is simple trolling.

[Beavah]

Yah, NancyB, in another thread you claim to be a former city attorney, eh?

 

Then you know that you have no business discussin' pending litigation or ongoing investigations in a nationwide public online forum. That's just foolish. And litigating a $300 fundraising mixup while subpoenaing children to testify? What in the name of heaven are you thinking?

 

You need, right now, this week, to get some help. Yeh should have contacts in your community you can turn to for referral to professional counseling. Use 'em. Anybody who's goin' through a mess like you seem to be should seek care. There's no shame in it. It's how yeh get through such things, and how you change your focus back to being a mother who can focus on her son and his needs rather than on hurtin' your ex.

 

Beyond that, without knowin' the nature of your divorce settlement and custody arrangements and such, I don't think anyone here can comment, eh? And da other scouting issues are best left to the folks in the troop who are workin' with your poor kid.

 

Beavah

 

[jhankins]

Burning bridges really only hurt the ones you love, and the ones especially close to you.

 

What attorney in their right mind would drag youth, parents, and their own reputation through a contempt hearing at $300 an hour over the very same amount of money? What attorney would put up with a client blasting it all over the internet?

 

I really hope your son can get past all the garbage in his way and enjoy the rest of his teen years.

[hotair36]

Since it does not appear that the ex (male leader) has done nothing in violation of the youth protection guidelines that is a possible reason the local council has not done anything. If there is nothing against the BSA standards of membership, then is no justifiable reason for the BSA to take an adverse action or investigate. Adult morality outside of the program is not in the BSAs purview to monitor. The actions of 2 adults may cause some raised eyebrows by parents but the BSA has no place in the dispute and should not have one.

I am not sure where the money is missing from? Is it from a special contingent fundraising activity or your son's home unit?

As to the Jamboree fund raising activities, most local councils I am aware of hold fundraisers as contingent activities and if a scout pulls out they dont get to keep what they had earned from special fundraising for jamboree fees. When a contingent member (or staff member) pulls out from the Jamboree they forfeit some of the fee already paid and any monies earned through fundraising activities dont go to the scout for personal use or for use at another activity. It sounds like the fundraising event (water sales) was for the Jamboree, not general program, so I would not expect the monies earned to be available for something else. If the fundraising was by the scouts home unit that might be a different situation unless the funds were already paid toward contingent fees and then the penalty/forfeiture would still apply.

[Gonzo1]

I agree with some of the other posters.

 

I don't think it's worth the trouble for $300, but I admire your stand for the principle of the matter. Since some of the parents are upset that their sons will be in court to testify, I think you should let the money go, move your son to another troop, preferably in a neighboring district, and move on.

[nldscout]

Gonzo1,

 

People will file claims for the smallest things just to prove a point. $300 is nothing. I have had a man sue his friend for $6.52 for a supposedly broken tool, 2 sisters sueing over a set of tupperware, and piles of others like it. Principle counts to some even if It cost tons to prove thier point