The father factor: Fathers and sons

[fgoodwin]

The father factor: Fathers and sons

 

http://www.antiguasun.com/paper/?as=view&sun=281935077507132005&an=410802067106152007&ac=Opinion

http://tinyurl.com/38wf8g

 

Saturday June 16 2007

 

Men become biological fathers in a moment. Not much is required except the right anatomical equipment and opportunity. The father need not love the mother. The father does not need a course in parenting, nor does he need to even desire to be a parent. The father does not always even know of his progeny. Nevertheless, each child born into this world has two parents, and one of them is, by definition, the father.

 

For many men, that is where their input begins and ends. Children need fathers. Ideally, those fathers will be married to their mothers, and living together in a loving family. But, even if children cannot grow up in a two-parent home, no child deserves to grow up without a father.

 

Fathers play a significant part in a son's life. At a certain age, little boys begin to investigate the world outside of their mother's touch, and their mother's voice. Little boys discover they are not the same as little girls, and all of a sudden their world needs redefining in the light of this revelation.

 

Fathers, when your son begins this search, whether at age two or age 12, wondering what sort of man he will become where does he look? Who does he see?

 

Television dads? Sorry, but the days of Leave it to Beaver are gone and the new generation of television fathers are not on the same playing field as Bill Cosby. Soap opera fathers have switched partners so many times even they cant keep track. Sport stars sometimes recognise they can play a morally upright role model, but just as often fans see their drinking escapades, angry violence and drug violations.

 

So fathers, what does your son see when he looks around?

 

What kind of man do you want him to become? Honest, hard-working, ethical: the kind of man who keeps his promises; who is faithful to his wife, and who loves his children. You want your son to be like you or maybe not, but you have something in mind for your son.

 

You want to be the kind of father whose son can come and sit down beside him and say, "Dad, Im really struggling with some things now, and I need your advice."

 

How to begin...? The writer of Psalms 127 exhorts, "Sons are a heritage from the Lord; children a reward from him." (Verse 3) Now, if someone gives you an inheritance, it is usually something to treasure: a keepsake not only valued for its monetary value, but for its significance, for its intrinsic value. Begin, fathers, by valuing your sons.

 

Recognise they are unique, and special; a part of you that no one else can duplicate or replicate. There has been no one else like your son in the past, there is no one like him now, or will there be someone just like him in the future. Children are a reward. A reward even if you do not deserve it, a reward even when you do not ask for it a reward from the Heavenly Father who has perfect love.

 

Cherish and nurture your son, fathers, with an attitude of gratitude and love: they are your inheritance and your reward.

 

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Note: With the current state of affairs we thought it timely to reprint the above article published 11 Aug. 2003.