sst3rd Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 I promised our Committee Chairperson I would post this problem to get ideas. I have a feeling though, that I won't like the advise. Here goes. A year and a half a go (August of 2000), one of our Scouts earned his Eagle. He also turned 18 that month. During his last year of Scouting, he became very inactive, and made committments to the Troop (the Scouts loved him, a natural leader) that he didn't keep. However, our CC and I (SM) guided this Scout through his Eagle process, and per the requirements, he earned his Eagle. That August, he went away to college, only to come home the following January, and is now attending college near his home. Here's the problem. The Troop (CC) received his Eagle package (our Council has a benefactor that purchases all Eagle Awards for the Scouts)August of 2000, and we've had it ever since. The Scout has never requested an Eagle Ceremony, and he has never been back to the Troop since he moved back home over a year ago. Our Troop usually plans the presentation with the Eagle Scout and his family. Our CC called the young man several times over the year and a half, and we've talked to his Mom at Cub Scout meetings (she runs the Pack even though her two sons have grow up), but the young man never has returned our phone calls. As of the fall of 2001, we dropped it. You guessed it, last week, the young man asked his mom to call our CC, to call him back to set up his Eagle Ceremony. Since this young man did not follow through to set up his Ceremony, I feel it's all a moot point. The Troop has long since moved on. Although I had a great relationship with this Scout over the years, I was told that if there was an Eagle Ceremony, he didn't want me to present him with his Eagle. Yes, this hurts, but is this a good time to bring up the fact that I had to dismiss his younger brother from the Troop for continuous outragious disipline problems. Or maybe the fact that this young man's mother (who still runs the Pack) has to reorganize the Pack ever fall, and hasn't provided any graduating Webolos for the Troop in four years (we are working these issues through appropriate channels). I went to school with this mom, and have known her for years, and have supported the Pack (and provided Den Chiefs) beyond what a SM needs to do, but I realize that's where the Troop's growth comes from (the Troop is dieing, but that's another story). Any thoughts will be graciously accepted and sent to our Troop Committee. Thanks, sst3rd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
featherswillfly Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 WOW!!! Do you have a problem and more than one I would say. I have a few questions. Why did the boy suddenly become in active, what were his circumstances or reasons for this? Have you or your CC spoken to the young man? I too am a CC and have been for 6 years. I have written my response to you at least 3 times and changed it each time. This is the final copy. I would first of all not bring in any other outside problems such as you are having with the mother or the other son. Those are separate problems. Focus only on this young man. What has happened is behind you and you cannot change it, but you can learn from it. You are going into a situation that you and many others have not ever been. Try to get through it with the least amount of damage possible. Go to your CC and have them call a meeting for your committee. Hopefully you have a strong group of people. Here again, questions. Do you HAVE to put on the Eagle ceremony? You say the benefactor buys the awards, but is the troop committed to putting on a ceremony for this young man? I don't believe so. Your troop is NOT responsible for his Eagle ceremony how ever you may help in guiding the family through the process. The young man and his family have this responsibility. The family can also ask for help from other people. Geewhiz give'm the awards and let them put on the ceremony themselves. Mail it to them registered!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Russell Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 You sure do have a bunch of problems, but I will address the obvious first - the Eagle ceremony. Our practice, which I believe to be the norm, is that the Eagle scout and his family plan the ceremony. I would turn it over to the family, and then cooperate fully with their plans. Thinking like Ann landers would, I believe that you and the troop should take the high road and cooperate as fully as requested. I think you will look back on it later as the right thing to do. The other issue is your comment that the troop is dying. You said that is another story. I would rather change the subject of this thread to your troop's future, because the future, not the past, is what we should care about. There is a lot of experience among those posting on this site, and I am sure that everyone here would love to explore ways to keep your troop alive and growing. After all, we're here for our scouts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evmori Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 I really don't see the problem. I don't feel it is the Troops responsibility to set up the Eagle Court of Honor. It is up to the Eagle. After all, he earned the award, not the Troop. I would deliver his Eagle package to him & explain that I would be willing to help arrange the ceremony, but it is his responsibility to secure the place & all the other necessities. Ed Mori Scoutmaster Troop 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob White Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 I'm sorry you have a situation like this to deal with. I agree with Bob Russell (and I haate to admit it, Ann Landers), to take the high road. The 18-year old young man may have a grudge against you now but time heals all wounds (well most anyway). He'll remember the meaningfull Eagle Court you give him long after he forgets abou the grudge. I t will also teach him a lesson abot living the scout law. I know some troops give the scout and the parents the responsibility of the Eagle Court because "it was the scout who earned the award". But didn't the scout earn all his other ranks, and the troop celebrated and presented those? I see no difference with the Eagle Rank. I agree that the scout and the family need more input to assure that the ceremony incororates personal touchees to make the presentation special for the scout. However it is a Boy Scout rank and I feel should be organized and presented by the Boy Scout unit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Long Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 Boys that were members of my troop will always be my boys no matter what. Our troop plans and conducts the Eagle COH in accordance with the Eagle families wishes. The whole family (directly and indirectly) worked to help the Eagle earn the award in our opinion, we honor all of them. Give him his Eagle court, and work to make it a good one by whatever existing standards or procedures your troop currently holds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chippewa29 Posted February 12, 2002 Share Posted February 12, 2002 Wow. This is an interesting situation. I'll add it to my list of things I hope I never have to deal with. My troop has had 12 Eagles over the years and we've held COH for 11 of us, each done separately (we all earned our awards at least several months apart). The one that didn't get a COH left the troop about two months after his BOR when his dad (the SM at the time) burned a few too many bridges with other adults in the troop (we were the second troop he had done that with the past three years). When we got word that his application had made it through national, the troop leaders (I was in college at the time) forwarded the paperwork to his family and we never heard from them again. Basically, if this Scout earned his Eagle in the troop and left under fairly good circumstances (he wasn't kicked out), then the troop should make some effort to recognize him. You may not need to offer up a full-blown Eagle COH. Instead, you could just add it to a regular COH as the climax. We had one Eagle that didn't really want an Eagle Court and preferred to just get it presented at a regular COH. We were all fine with that, but his parents wanted a full-blown Eagle COH and that is what we gave him. He wasn't your ideal Eagle. He did the requirements, but had been a pain in his first couple of years and a neutral until he earned his Eagle at 16 1/2. His activity level was suspicious (he only came because his parents wanted him to get his Eagle) and we didn't see him for two months after his Eagle BOR (then it was only to start planning the COH). By the time we had his COH a year after his BOR, he had been to exactly two troop meetings (both to plan his COH) and a third of the kids in the troop didn't even know who he was. The whole ceremony only took 20 minutes (ours usually last 40-60 minutes). Try speaking with the scout and his parent(s) separately to see what the situation really is. It may be that his parents want him to have the ceremony, but he doesn't. If that is the case, then you may be able to convince them that a full blown COH isn't the best way to go. A simple ceremony at a meeting or COH may work just as well. A good example is my cousin-in-law. He earned his Eagle just before he turned 18. Through some weird circumstances, his paperwork never made it to national for completion (although he did the BOR and was approved by council). Also, his troop folded soon after his Eagle BOR. Therefore, he was never awarded his Eagle medal. A couple of years ago, someone told him that if they could reconstruct his records, he could get reprocess the paperwork and get his Eagle. They managed to do so, and he was presented his Eagle (at age 30) in front of his parents, wife, and kids in a 15 minute ceremony at a Council Exec Board Meeting. It ended up making the local paper. He was very happy with that presentation and it meant more to him than a full blown COH would have years before. Eagle Courts don't have to be full blown affairs. They just have to present the best attributes of the Scout Oath and Law. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sst3rd Posted February 12, 2002 Author Share Posted February 12, 2002 Thanks to all for your input. I will be meeting with our CC with all of this acquired information. She will be talking with the young man, as he does not wish to have me (SM) involved. He became inactive in Troop functions mainly because of his girlfriend and his ability to drive a car (normal stuff, no problems there). But, he kept making commitments to the Troop and Scouts, and then bailing. Other than that, this young man and I have had a great Scouting relationship, and he will always be one of my Eagles. His Mom and I have the strained relationship. We will take the high road, and if I have to bow out, I will do so, but I really don't want to see our Troop in the middle of this. His Mom runs the Pack, and not very well. For years I've helped her because I knew that we should be getting new Scouts from the Pack. It isn't working (four years), so our COR is involved, and the Council is aware. The Troop Scouters are following all procedures, and we've long since been working alternative recruiting programs with limited success. The Troop will survive, and the Pack will get its act together (the COR will not give her a choice). The Troop had simply got tired of waiting for the Pack to have a successfull program, and our Scouts want and need younger Scouts to teach. This problem didn't occur over night, and it will not be corrected over night. We're just ready to get the process going NOW !!! We'll probably simply give the Eagle Award package to him, and let the family take it from there. I will still be open for your comments, and again, many thanks to all. sst3rd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eisely Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 Many units leave Eagle Courts completely up to the families. It sounds like your historic practice was to have strong family involvement. It also sounds like you have a very supportive CC. Let her handle it as she seems willing to do. I have no suggestion for hurt feelings. Hopefully the issues with the mom will be worked out, as you indicate. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now