Frustrations With Den Leaders

[drmbear]

This year is my second as Cubmaster. The first year we had great Spring recruiting for Tigers, had several great parents agree to be Tiger Den Leaders, one an Eagle Scout, they had the training and materials and more to kick off a great year. Or so I thought. When you are trying to create something you've never seen before it is almost impossible. While they made it through the year, there was little shared leadership, they got bogged down, and the leaders just couldn't take it. We actually have two entirely different parents serving as den leaders for the Wolf Den this year. Tiger Den shouldn't be like that.

 

First of all, look at the Tiger Program. It is definitely a cushy, easy thing. If the boys are moving, getting to do things, make lots of noise, and go see and do cool things, you're pretty much done. Since now, everything necessary to be a trained TDL is online, unless someone stepped up saying they wanted to be a den leader, I wasn't pushing the idea early. I actually decided I'd rather have all the parents about on equal footing at the start of the year in September - that way no one could dump off their responsibilities on the "trained" leader (with absolutely no experience).

 

So for this second chance to go through the year I decided to act as the Tiger Cub Den Leader for a while. At the first meeting I used den meeting plan 1, I followed it, I had it in my hand, and right away I was handing it to the adult partners to lead parts of the meeting. I gave the week 2 meeting plan to the parents before we left and assigned parts for several of them to do. The problem is that when someone agrees to be den leader, all the other parents tend to back off knowing they don't need to do anything now. That's what happened the first year. The "Shared Leadership" model of the Tiger year should be what sets up everything in the entire Cub Scout program, including Pack Committee and leadership. The parents need to figure out that they CAN do it, it is not that hard, resources to guide you are available, and it makes a huge difference to the kids.

 

By the end of the second den meeting, I had different parents taking lead responsibility for meetings 3, 4, and 5. I was also pushing the idea that having someone represent them and organize them (just as I had been doing) as the Tiger Den Leader was necessary, since I was the Cubmaster and I really wanted to get back to my son's den and help with the Webelos. Although it sounds nice to have an experienced Tiger Den Leader for the whole year, I think it defeats the purpose of the Tiger year. During the year when they have to be there as the adult partner is the best time to make sure they "get it" that the Cub Scout program is created by all the families of the pack, not the few "leaders." I realized I really wanted them to take responsibility for their son's experience in CS.

 

Having them see that they could do it had three of those parents agreeing to help in the den and pack by the time we got to that 3rd meeting. They helped with presentation of Tiger Paws and beads, and we had lots of fun. The new den leaders got it that what they were to do is get others to lead upcoming den meeting, not try to do everything, just like I had been doing. They were excited to get trained, and they attended our council's Pow Wow a few weeks ago, the first time in several years it wasn't just me and the now Committee Chair attending these Council training events (Pow Wow & University of Scouting). It's a win because we have some new leaders that are excited about Scouting, they know that it doesn't have to be a drain or a chore, and they are having fun doing it. I never saw that in the faces of last year's TDL's and I regret it - because it is my fault. We missed most of our Tiger year, because we didn't get started until the end of January with my son, and by the time we got there it was only one other boy in the den. We hooked up with the Wolves for the most part, and I didn't start as a DL until the Wolf year.

 

I get it now, after participating in forums like this and going through the material extensively, trying to pull out the underlying intention. I've determined that the most important leadership goal of the Tiger year is shared leadership. Having an experienced TDL may sound great, but I would want to make sure that it does not prevent the whole team of adult partners from taking responsibility. Of course it is necessary that the boys have a blast, and since they are boys we keep them moving. But anyone that is a parent of a boy should already know how to be silly and have fun with their boy - and I gave them my nutso 9YO example in the first several meetings. Right from the start the boys don't want to miss.

 

This helps me as Cubmaster as well. I know them all by name, and use them during the Pack Events. And since the Tiger Den is "my" den, I get great Tiger yells and participation from them in songs and things. And I'm not the big bad CM across the room, but someone they connect with. Often, first graders come in a little shy - mine are over that!! I'm definitely doing it again next year, and I'll try to work with whoever becomes the new CM after that to do it as well, or even come back to help for those few weeks from whatever Scout Troop I'm with. I think it is just too important.

 

Hope this helps.

[ScoutNut]

I was a Tiger den leader for 10+ years.

 

I feel the way to get the best out of your Tiger den is to use an experienced den leader, and to use Shared Leadership in the Tiger den.

 

The Tiger year is one of learning for BOTH the Tiger AND his Tiger Partner (parent). They are learning about BSA, the Pack, Cub Scouting, and starting to learn how to lead. Having an experienced leader to teach them, and get them "hooked" on Scouting (and volunteering) will help keep the den, and the Pack strong.

 

SP if you, as Cubmaster, do not feel that the den leaders are delivering a good BSA program to the Scouts in their dens, you should first talk to, and counsel, them. If that does not work, talk to your Committee Chair and Charter Organization Representative, about replacing them as soon as possible.

[Jeffrey H]

Unfortunately, it seems that playing with children is a skill that takes a fair amount of understanding and some training to "get." And then some work and imagination to make it pay off.

As adults, we sometimes forget what kids consider fun.  For one hour of your den meeting, be a kid again.  Keep it simple.  If all possible, don't make the entire den meeting a "lecture hall."  They already deal with that in school and don't need it in Cub Scouts.  There are times to be serious but make sure those teachable moments are mixed with enjoyable times with their den buddies.  Take your meetings outside; go on an outing; take a hike; get away from routine.  It's not necessary to spend the entire den meeting working on "achievements" since alot of those can be done at home.  I'm now a Cubmaster, but spent many years as a Den Leader.  I can tell you that mixing up the routine and changing the pace was a great prescription to prevent burn-out.  

 

 

[kari_cardi]

I agree, drmbear. That's the formula I hit upon a few years ago, and it WORKS! Parents have time to get oriented to scouting, boys have fun, pack leadership gets to know the majority of new boys in person. All good things. Following the typical recommendations for Tiger Den leadership ends up with the clueless leading the clueless, which is not a good thing.