At what point do you decide to let go? (long, sorry)

[Cardinal]

You have some interesting issues that might complicate the approach you need to take.

 

- the other leaders do not believe there is a problem

- no CM

 

Are your den leaders all on the pack committee? If not, perhaps you should change that. Right now it appears that the pack functions separately from the dens. So they figure that their dens are working ok and the pack is someone else's problem.

 

Our pack committee is pretty much run by the den leaders, with the CM and CC added to the mix. If you have a committee separate from the den leaders then they can do what this assessment. If the den leaders are the committee, then they have to agree that there is a problem or need, even if they don't see it as being large.

 

It is difficult to lead volunteers. Some times you have to let them do things their way, or they won't want to do anything. Other times you have to figure out a way to motivate them to see it your way.

 

At this time you are a committee member. You probably need to change this. Publicly accept a position as either CC or CM. Without this it will be more difficult to create the changes. However, you need to 'accept' the position, not appoint yourself. This requires that you look for your opportunity.

 

Without such a role, it might be viewed awkwardly for you to stand up at the Pack meeting and say that you need leaders. Who would you be speaking for? Is the CC asking you to address the parents? When the other den leaders think there is no problem?

 

Some of your work will need to be behind the scenes, but try not to appear political. This cannot become a Coup.

 

There is a long and proud tradition in this country of women stepping into roles left open during war. Use that image to convince the moms that with Dad away, they must teach their sons to be men. In ten years, those boys will be the men going off to war. Time is moving on.

 

Homework calls.

 

Good luck.

 

Cardinal

 

[Cardinal]

You have some interesting issues that might complicate the approach you need to take.

 

- the other leaders do not believe there is a problem

- no CM

 

Are your den leaders all on the pack committee? If not, perhaps you should change that. Right now it appears that the pack functions separately from the dens. So they figure that their dens are working ok and the pack is someone else's problem.

 

Our pack committee is pretty much run by the den leaders, with the CM and CC added to the mix. If you have a committee separate from the den leaders then they can do what this assessment. If the den leaders are the committee, then they have to agree that there is a problem or need, even if they don't see it as being large.

 

It is difficult to lead volunteers. Some times you have to let them do things their way, or they won't want to do anything. Other times you have to figure out a way to motivate them to see it your way.

 

At this time you are a committee member. You probably need to change this. Publicly accept a position as either CC or CM. Without this it will be more difficult to create the changes. However, you need to 'accept' the position, not appoint yourself. This requires that you look for your opportunity.

 

Without such a role, it might be viewed awkwardly for you to stand up at the Pack meeting and say that you need leaders. Who would you be speaking for? Is the CC asking you to address the parents? When the other den leaders think there is no problem?

 

Some of your work will need to be behind the scenes, but try not to appear political. This cannot become a Coup.

 

There is a long and proud tradition in this country of women stepping into roles left open during war. Use that image to convince the moms that with Dad away, they must teach their sons to be men. In ten years, those boys will be the men going off to war. Time is moving on.

 

Homework calls.

 

Good luck.

 

Cardinal

 

[TundraHawk]

Cardinal, thanks for your post.

 

Our den leaders are indeed part of our pack committee, along with our CC, treasurer, secretary, and a few other positions (I'm Advancements/Memberships).

 

Unfortunately, when I say our leaders don't think there is a problem, I'm speaking of ALL our leadership...CC on down. They see the need for more volunteers, but that is it. For instance, they think a CM is not needed. I just can't comprehend this.

 

We basically have a program where our dens are running on their own, with a committee structure in the background. Our pack program is incredibly weak...boring meetings, no community involvement, and our special events (regatta, etc.) are so unorganized they are complete chaos.

 

I completely agree with you that I can't appoint myself to a position. Not only would it be difficult to be considered a legitimate leader, but I'm not comfortable with taking that route at all.

 

Right before our CC left, he did appoint me (via a personal email) to be the CM (supposedly with full backing of the committee), but he never officially appointed me in front of the group...and the members I've talked to know nothing about this appointment. Even if I did take on CM, our CC has made the job for me even harder - if not impossible - by constantly telling folks that the CM job is "no big deal" and that the CM "only runs the pack meeting."

 

In regards to recruiting volunteers...this is something I approached the CC about. He thought it would be a good idea and since he was going to be gone, he asked me to head up the project.

 

Tonight we have a committee meeting, and I'm going to bring many of these issues to the table. If I'm met with indifference or blank stares that will tell me quite a bit in regards to my family's future with the pack.

 

[Rixkidz]

Not completely on the subject, but...

 

Our Pack is over 60 years old and has NEVER had a chartered organization.

Our Chartered organization is the parents. We completely support ourselves with popcorn sales, cans and a few other fund raisers.. I dont think

loosing your CO is the worst thing ?!

[TundraHawk]

Rix, you're right. Actually the charter is really the least of our problems. Our volunteers are more hung up on having a certain crossover ceremony than trying to find the essential leadership that we are lacking. Another month has gone by, and we've yet to find a Cubmaster (it was shrugged off again by the committee).

 

I'm completely and utterly at a loss now. Am I asking too much of this pack?

 

 

 

 

[Oakville Tim]

TundraHawk,

 

It seems apparent to me, from reading this thread, that every reasonable suggestion you (and your husband) have brought to the table to revitalize your Scout program has fallen on deaf ears. You haven't indicated that any professional Scouters -- the Unit Commisssioner, the District Executive, and so forth -- have stepped up to assist you.

 

With apologies to SemperParatus (U.S. Coast Guard!!) and Eamonn and so many others whose posts I learn from each day, IMHO you have reached a point where it's time for you and your son to move on and find a new home for all the fun that Scouting will continue to offer him.

 

You ought to tell him, heart-to-heart, that you want/need to find a (nearby?) Scout unit in which you can resume sharing in the fun he is bound to have. That the remaining people in the current Pack are nice, and that certainly your son will continue to see those nice kids at school each day... but where Scouting is concerned, the workload you (and your husband) face will be too much for you, personally, to do any longer.

 

Your son is surely aware of the time you've been spending, and the many hats you've been wearing, for the sake of the current Pack. Being a Webelos 1, he isn't too far on the calendar from moving to a new school building anyway.

 

So, find a quality AND ESTABLISHED unit nearby -- maybe your son plays on ballteams, or goes to church with, some of the Webelos 1s in that unit. Make sure this is a unit with many good and willing volunteer adults and with all the key positions filled. One in which there is a tradition of 'How Can I Help?' entrenched well.

 

Fill out the transfer papers -- AND make sure and continue to contribute your obvious positive energy to the new Pack as soon as possible, so that your son can see the smile that's back on your face.

 

And when your son bridges up to a Troop, hey, maybe he'll see some of the boys back in his old Pack. Those who bridge up (and their parents) obviously will have found the answers themselves on keeping the old Pack alive -- with not one more ounce of your own energy spent on solving a problem no one in the old Pack recognized, as recently as last night's meeting!!

 

I think, TundraHawk, you have earned this peace of mind. Don't lose sleep, or give yourself ulcers, so early in this new year. You and your son have so much fun in Scouting to look forward to -- go now, and look for it!!

 

 

[TundraHawk]

Your post was such a welcome sight to me, Tim, when I checked the board earlier. Late last night I decided to resign from the pack. This morning I went to council and asked for my name be taken off the pack contact list (I'm the one folks call if they are interested in joining/transferring to our pack). I wanted to talk to the DE, but he wasn't available.

 

(forgot to mention earlier...right now we don't have a UC. I was told that our DC was to attend our meeting last night. He never showed up. Our DE has gotten such conflicting stories on our pack, honestly, I'm to the point where I don't think it would help to talk to him)

 

I've been busy packing up all the pack supplies I have...membership forms, awards, rosters, etc. It's amazing how much stuff you can accumulate in just a few months.

 

Right now my husband is planning on staying until the end of the school year. He has an awesome bunch of scouts (Wolves), and we both worry what will happen if he leaves. Our son is in this den so he is - at least - getting a good quality den program.

 

It's so hard because I have become extremely passionate about scouts, and the thought of removing myself from it just tears my heart out. Both my husband and I have seen what a change scouts has made on the boys in his den in just the past four months. All I've thought about these past few weeks are ways to turn the pack around and how to give this gift to ALL the boys in our pack.

 

[Oakville Tim]

TundraHawk,

 

(1) I believe greatly that your stepping down is bound to give you a mental breather. You SOUND as though you will benefit greatly from this.

 

(2) This will be a great opportunity for OTHER PARENTS to step up if they want the Pack to continue, for the sake of their own sons. They now will have the chance to get trained and start putting in the time, etc., you have so willingly been giving.

 

(3) If your son's Den has other 'quality parents' -- I mean, people upon whom you have been able to consistently count for any and all sorts of help with the Den program -- and your research reveals a 'quality' neighboring Pack, then perhaps your son's Den could transfer as a whole and remain intact, now inside a vibrant, thriving, 'alive' Pack. It's both possible and permissible.

 

Good, good luck to you! Keep us posted on what you decide and how things are going.

 

And remember: There's a reason the good Lord put eyes in only the front of our head!