Proof That The Scout Law and Oath Sinks In

[SR540Beaver]

My son is a 9 year old Webelos 1. He is at that age where some of lifes hard lessons are being learned. We had our den meeting last night and as usual, a number of the boys brought their Yu Gi Oh cards to compare and trade prior to the meeting. Not something that I really like, but accepted since they have to be put away when the meeting starts. My son handed them to me which I put in the hood of his coat and set in the chair next to me. I left the room for about 2 minutes and then came back and set down next to his coat again. I reached over to rearrange his coat and the cards were gone. I checked the floor under the chair. No cards. I went thru his coat pockets and mine and checked the floor again. Numerous times. Unbelievably, a Scout had stolen them. When I put them in the hood of his coat, I pushed them deep inside and pushed the hood closed where they were not visible. Since we were about 10 minutes from the meeting being over and snack time was approaching, I told the den leader. She promptly announced that my son's cards had been taken and we needed to search the room or who ever had them needed to give them back. Everyone including the parents looked. No cards. Before we left, the Cub Master stood up and said, "hey guys, we need to find these cards. I'm going to check all of my pockets, how about you do it too." No cards. We had to leave without them. I told my son how sorry I was that they were taken and that he had learned a valubalr lesson about how some people will be dishonest and how you need to take precations with your possessions. I told him that he had done nothing wrong, but that he really didn't need to take his cards to a den meeting where they might tempt someone to take them.

 

He was upset, but handled it in a mature manner and only teared up once. My proudest moment was on the way home. He said, "you know Dad, whoever took them was not being a good Scout and isn't following the Scout Oath and Law. Scouts are supposed to be honest and trustworthy." I smiled and told him he was exactly correct. It is nice to know that the example we set at home and the lessons we teach them thru Scouting does sink in for most of them. It is just sad that he had to learn a hard lesson of how poorly some people conduct themselves at a Scout meeting.

[acco40]

May I offer a comment? I in no way am trying to blame the victim but I don't think you or the den leader handled the situation very well. The first public response to the boys was stated as "She (the den leader after you had talked with her and made the assumption that the cards were stolen) promptly announced that my son's cards had been taken and we needed to search the room or who ever had them needed to give them back." The natural reaction to such an announcement is shame and denial. If you offered the offender a "way out" such as stating, my son doesn't seem to be able to find his Yu Gi Oh cards. Has anyone seen them? I would be very thankful to anyone who could help us find them. These type comments let the offender have a way to return the cards without being ostracized. Some will disagree with this approach but at this age, nine years old, the boys are still learning right and wrong. When asked point blank if it is wrong to take from others, they will all nod in agreement, yes. However, when actually faced with a tempting "offer", free Yu Gi Oh cards, it may be a different story.

 

My younger children always asked to bring a toy, Pokemon cards, etc. to their older brothers Pack meetings, to the store, etc. and many times come home without them. Usually, they set them down, and forgot them but in their eyes they were "stolen." I used it as a lesson to teach them that it is not always appropriate to bring their "stuff" to all events.

 

If you study child psychology, you will find out that children have a much deeper attachment to their toys that most adults realize. They are not just possessions, but something that actually defines their being. The loss of a toy can be very traumatic to a young child.

[NativeTexan]

I'm going to brag on the boys in my den a little, so bear with me. Last night we rode on a float in a local Christmas Parade. We allowed the boys to toss candy to the spectators with the understanding that they would not stand up on the float or throw candy at the people and their vehicles parked on the side of the rode. Numerous times I had to remind/correct/fuss at a few rotten apples for breaking the rules. By the time the event was over I was pretty upset at these boys for not following these rules and for disobeying me when I asked them to follow the rules. There are now thoughts of no candy next year.

 

The boys in my bear den had chosen to sit together as a group. Their behavior last night was excellent. They kept seated, tossed candy at the feet of the spectators and not once (to our knowledge) hit anyone or any vehicle. I am very proud of them.

[SR540Beaver]

Acco,

 

I agree with most of what you said. Let me clarify a few points. While I stated my opinion that the cards were stolen, that is not what I privately voiced to the den leader. I told her that they were not where I had put them and were missing. I had no control or idea how she would approach it. She did not use the word stolen either. She did say that we needed to hunt for them and if someone had them, they needed to return them. I don't remember her exact words, but basically she was not too happy and got her message across. I agree, there probably was a better way to state it. The Cub Master took the better approach of not sounding accusatory and suggesting that maybe some one picked them up and forgot to put them back, let's check one more time. He did give them an out.

 

This wasn't a case of them being "stolen" in the eyes of a child who misplaced them. I hid them from sight specifically to keep anyone from being tempted from even looking at them instead of paying attention in the meeting. Whoever took them, spotted me putting them in my sons coat hood and covering them up. The coat had not been disturbed in any way. Someone simply slid their hand in and put them in another hiding place. The boys were on the opposite side of a Sunday School room from where I was sitting and were milling around one of the Dad's playing his guitar prepping them for Christmas Carols. They waited until I left the room to make their move and uncover them. They could have walked over and asked to see them if they just wanted a look. They WERE stolen.

 

I'll be the first to say that the boys shouldn't bring things like that to a den meeting and my son will tell you that he never will again.

 

My whole point to my post was that no matter how hard we try to impart the Scouting way to kids, a few don't get it, but overall it sinks in pretty good with the majority. I agree that 9 year olds are still learning finer points of right and wrong, but the vast majority of 9 year olds know that taking something that belongs to someone else is stealing and it is wrong. Otherwise, they wouldn't hide their actions.

[evmori]

kwc57,

Where were the other adults when the supposed theft took place? Did they see anything? If you buried them as deep as you say you did, then it would be rather obvious if someone was stealing them.

 

Ed Mori

Scoutmaster

Troop 1

1 Peter 4:10

[sst3rd]

Slightly off topic, but several years ago at an OA Fall Fellowship, there was a big event. As always, many Scouts brought their large and valuable OA flap collections to trade. They usually left them out on the tables in the mess hall over Friday night, as the big trading session would be all day Saturday. Never had there been problems.......and then it happened. One particular Scout's collection was stolen. At breakfast, there was an announcement, but by lunch, nothing was resolved. Of course the point of OA members being HONOR CAMPERS came up. As most Scouts who seriously collect OA flaps, they have MANY duplicates in order to trade with. By dinner that Saturday night, this Scout was presented with a new collection of OA flaps that was as good as his old collection. Yes, there are rotten apples even in the OA, but I was so inspired by these Scout's generosity, I felt this story fit this thread.

 

sst3rd

[SR540Beaver]

Ed,

 

The room in question was a Sunday School room that I would guess to be 12 ft x 20 ft. The number of people in the room varied. We had 9 boys there that night with 5 in our room working on Cristmas songs and 4 in the other room. Eventually, they all came back together. While we were split up, there were 4 adults besides myself in our room. The other room had 3 adults. One of the Dad's was playing his guitar and all eyes were pretty much on him and the boys singing. Being 9 year old boys, they never really quit moving and were up and down, in chairs, on the floor, etc. The cards were not visible where I put them. Since all of the boys had seen the cards of the 3 or 4 boys who brought them prior to the meeting, whoever took them knew who had cards and who didn't. One of the boys put his cards back in his shirt pocket. One of the other boys had his in the pocket of his coat he never took off. Although he kept taking them out and messing with them thru the meeting. Whoever the person was who took them, they saw my son hand them to me when they were told to put them away for the meeting and saw where I put them. When I was out of the room and everyone was paying attention to the guitarist, the person took the chance and snatched them. All it would take is sitting down in the chair next to the coat and waiting until no one was watching. All of the boys had their backs to the chair and the guitarist was watching his guitar. Where he hid them, I don't know. He could have slid them inside his shirt or down his pants. An appeal was made for their return several times, but we obviously were not going to do a strip search. They are gone and they can be replaced. Again, my whole point of posting was to point out that the incident drove home the point of the Scout Oath and Law to my son. He connected the dots on his own by knowing what the Oath and Law is and means and applying it to the situation. I'm proud that he understands them and tries to apply them in his young life.

[evmori]

kwc57,

Sounds like it's time to stop the boys from bringing extra things to the meeting that shouldn't be there in the 1st place.

 

Ed Mori

Scoutmaster

Troop 1

1 Peter 4:10

[sctmom]

Kwc,

I think your son did learn a valuable lesson the hard way. You should be very proud that he related the incident to the Scout Oath and Law. I think you said he is pretty new to Scouts. That makes it even more special. Some boys who have been in scouts for years would never make such a connection. Some adults would never make such a connection.

 

Be sure to tell your son you are proud of the way he has been brave and handled things. Also, that you are proud he understands the Scout Oath and Law, and that he takes them seriously. I'm sure your love and approval will make up for the lost cards.

 

Kudos to both of you.

 

[fboisseau]

sst3rd,

Your story reminded me about a story told to me about my great-grandfather, who I called Papa Joe. The story does not have anything to do with Scouting, but it does have to do with honesty. Papa Joe lived in a town near a river and on the river he had a shack where he kept his fishing poles. When he was not using his fishing poles he allowed the local hobos and bums to use them to catch fish. Well one time he when to his shack and found one of the poles missing. He let it be know that one of his poles was missing and if it did not return by that night he would not allow them to use his poles anymore. That evening he returned to find serveral brand new poles had been purchased to replace to one that was stolen. I think about this story sometimes and think about how much has changed.

[SR540Beaver]

I wanted to provide an update on this incident. When we showed up for the den meeting last night, the Cub Master had my son's cards in hand and returned them to him. There were a lot of people around at the time and he said he could give me some details later. I told him it wasn't important, I was just glad they were returned. My son was told by another scout that they had been found under a sofa cushion in an adjoining room. All's well that ends well. My hope is that the person responsible learned a lesson that will prevent him from doing this in the future.

 

A short story. When I was 4 or 5 we were visiting my grandmother out of town. All of us kids walked over to a little mom and pop grocery store a block or two over from my grandmother's house. I saw a lone gumball inside a box of receipts on the counter. I knew that taking it was wrong and waited until the shopkeeper wasn't looking before I snagged it. I reasoned to myself that if it was in the box, it must be trash. But I still know it was wrong. By the time I got home, the shopkeeper had called my dad and he was waiting for me. He marched my tiny hiney back to the store to apologize and pay for it. That was the first and LAST thing I ever stole.

[sctmom]

Glad to hear your son got his cards back, while still learning an important lesson in life.