Extraterrestrial Leave No Trace?

[Trevorum]

From the perspective of informing on human behavior, "trash" becomes an artifact as soon as it is discarded. Even recent trash can be surprisingly informative. William Rathje of the University of Arizona is famous for his "garbage project" - excavating at the city landfill. If you have some time, google him; his conclusions about modern American behaviors are fairly surprising.

 

Under most circumstances an archeological site can not be considered for the National Register unless it is 50 years old. Although strictly speaking it is only applicable to sites affected by federal actions, this bright line has led to general use of the 50 year criterion. More recent deposits ("trash dumps") are still recorded but they are generally not classified as "sites". The problem is that the 50 year rule is a rolling criterion. The trash dumps I sneered at while a grad student are now bona fide archeological sites.

 

Newly discovered human remains are a separate class. If found in anything other than a clearly prehistoric context, our first call is to local law enforcement. Only if the ME decides it is not a crime scene can the archeology proceed. If the remains are prehistoric or are recognizably Native American then interested tribes must be consulted. So yes, context is the most important criterion, not age.

[Beavah]

Newly discovered human remains are a separate class.

 

Yah, now there's one I've never covered in teachin' LNT.

 

I wonder how it would apply to Extraterrestrial LNT?

[gwd-scouter]

Though not human, would the newly discovered (at least new in 1947) alien remains in Roswell count as a separate class?

[packsaddle]

gwd, I have to say your lack of knowledge of this important historical event is astonishing. They're not at Roswell but rather at Area 51 which is located in Nevada. Some more facts of which you may not be aware. The Germans recoved a crashed flying saucer in 1939. Some of the superior technology they gained from studying the wreckage allowed them the confidence to attempt world (rather than continental) domination and they almost succeeded. The craft and some of the technology were captured by the Russians and this is why they were so quick to build their own nuclear weapon after WWII.

The alien race (which had both an endo- and a vestigial exoskeleton and looked a bit like praying mantises but with just four appendages) later sent a mission to study our nuclear tests but another one of their craft crashed for some reason near Roswell. The alien bodies recovered from that crash were taken to Area 51 and autopsied. This is how we know so much about their anatomy.

Some of the technology that allowed us to maintain a technological lead over the Russians came from information from the wreckage from the Roswell crash. And while the Russians were able to get a satellite up first, we also employed this alien knowledge to beat them to the moon.

 

Want to know another supersecret? We went to the moon to find other evidence of this alien race...and we found it. That's the stuff no one will talk about and one reason why the Edward Lee Howard spy case is so under-reported. Howard successfully fled to Russia when he was exposed and we'll never know for sure how much damage he did. But we do know he was a member of MJ-12 a group of 12 top military and scientific personnel assembled by President Truman in 1947 (there's that date again) to begin communications with the alien race. The secret meetings began later and then, in 1964 there was an actual landing of three saucers for a meeting at Holloman Air Force Base in New Mexico. Alien mind control of governments began shortly thereafter. Nixon was especially susceptible but the crucial evidence of this was in a missing 18 minutes of tape (Rosemary was very loyal). Also so began the biological experiments on humans and livestock. In fact the codes for some enzymes supplied by the aliens have been inserted in genetically modified foods, thus explaining the rise in ADD and related syndromes in American but not third world societies. Not to mention the rise of Rap Music. The Teletubbies were no accident. Yep, alien backlash.

Wanna know why the CIA just destroyed all the torture tapes? Because the subjects, ahem, weren't human. Duh!

 

But the really good part is...the Roswell aliens weren't dead at first. We managed to extract some viable gametes and other tissues and merged them with human ones in a diabolical experiment - under the influence of mind control - that we're only seeing the beginnings of today. Take a look at the current candidates running for President. See if you can spot the exobiotic chimeras. Also already in both our Congress and our Administration, not to mention the governments of France and Papua New Guinea (go figure). Take a really, really good look at Henry Kissinger. Think about all the political types who have ended up with brain disorders...Reagan, Atwater, Casey, Campbell...yeah, I know. That political view is no brain disorder and no accident either... uh huh.

Check out the state governors...uh huh...see what I mean? All that stuff that happens in certain Southern states is beginning to make sense now, isn't it? IYKWIM

 

Yeah, that's right, in these forums we are sooooooo worried about gays and atheists. But the real danger is already here, already insinuating itself into our society, our genome! Poor little Jorge may look like an illegal alien but there's a whole lot more there than meets the eye...about 15% of the time and increasing. And legality is the least of our troubles. Resistance IS futile.

 

[Beavah]

Yah, packsaddle, your knowledge in this area is a bit scary, eh?

 

And no sooner did yeh speak it then confirmation came out! The human race has experienced more genetic evolution in the recent stretch of time than ever before. We're evolving at nearly 100 times the "normal" rate!

 

It's that alien DNA, I'm tellin' ya! Wish they hadn't violated ET-LNT!

 

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2007/12/071211-human-evolution.html

 

Beavah

 

[packsaddle]

Hey! Who are you saying violated ET!? Inquiring minds want to know! You'd better not be pointing a tentacle at me!

[GernBlansten]

50 year rule? Yeah, I remember that. We took the scouts to a B17 bomber crash site in the woods behind my house. Crashed back in 1945. Its an protected site now, all the little pieces are historical artifacts now. 15 years ago, it was just wreckage and junk. I'm cool with that. But I ain't giving up the alien body parts I found even though they glow through the shoe box I keep them in on the shelf in the garage.

[local1400]

packsaddle-if those black sedans pull up, and we never hear from you again, so long my friend!

[ElyriaLeader]

Packsaddle was going good until he said that the aliens were at area 51, everyone knows they were taken to Wright-Patterson AFB in Dayton Oh. for examination, then later transferred to the permanently sealed bunker that was in the special weapons area at Loring AFB in Maine. So as in all the visitations LNT has been followed, but not by the visitors, just the government.

[packsaddle]

Wow, thanks for the update, ElyriaLeader. I'll add that info to my database (offline, of course, to prevent you-know-who from cracking into it). Local1400, thanks. When the waterboarding starts I'll be sure to mention lots of you guys prominently in my confessions. Man, we're going to have some fun!

[GernBlansten]

Pack, I just hope that when you scream GERNBLANSTEN from under that wet rag that it sounds more like GOLDWINGER. Now I have to put another layer of Reynolds on. Thanks!

[Ohio_Scouter]

Fifty year rule, huh? I guess that makes me an historical artifact. Wonder if I'm also a protected site?

[gwd-scouter]

Hmmm, according to the historical document, Independence Day, the aliens are in Area 51 along with a working space ship.

 

As for grabbing the roll of Reynolds, here's a bit of useful information:

 

An Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie (AFDB) is a type of headwear that can shield your brain from most electromagnetic psychotronic mind control carriers. AFDBs are inexpensive (even free if you don't mind scrounging for thrown-out aluminium foil) and can be constructed by anyone with at least the dexterity of a chimp (maybe bonobo). This cheap and unobtrusive form of mind control protection offers real security to the masses. Not only do they protect against incoming signals, but they also block most forms of brain scanning and mind reading, keeping the secrets in your head truly secret. AFDBs are safe and operate automatically. All you do is make it and wear it and you're good to go! Plus, AFDBs are stylish and comfortable.

 

What are you waiting for? Make one today!

[OldGreyEagle]

Well, now that the thread has turned silly (not that it was straight in the first place)I have to ask a question. In my first post, I said Mars, and then "mar ours". Did anyone catch that? I thought it was hysterical and all I got were crickets chirping in the night air. Please give me feedback, I'm workin' here

[ElyriaLeader]

Hmmmm....might have been the ""artistic freedom"" that was used during the filming of the forementioned historical document. Pretty sure the ET's were at Loring due to the proliferation of three headed fish and glowing trees that hummed in harmony surrounding the bunker.