What would you think of an Eagle never getting a COH?

[Joni4TA]

Hypothetical...

 

If you knew a boy who earned the rank of Eagle almost a year ago but STILL hadn't had a court of honor - what would you think?

 

The parent (an ASM) has been asked if they needed help planning it, since about 90 days following the boy earning it. Still nothing...

 

Meanwhile the boy became scarce at meetings.. and so did the parent (an ASM).

 

Would you figure the parent was "too busy" to plan something or would you think after a year that the parent of the Eagle must not care so much to honor the boy?

[Gold Winger]

Maybe it just isn't important to the Scout.

 

There was an Eagle Scout from my son's troop who earned his Eagle right before he left for college. He didn't have his COH until the following fall. So time really isn't a factor.

 

 

 

 

[evmori]

It is completely up to the Scout! Some don't want it, others do. What would I think? Nothing.

 

Ed Mori

1 Peter 4:10

[Lisabob]

It is easy to assume too much in this situation. I too, know a couple of young men who have earned Eagle and either chose not to have a COH, or who had it a really long time later due to school and other scheduling issues. If it is important to the scout then sure, helping plan one is great. If it isn't high on the scout's priority list or if the scout has it on his list but just not right now, then that's his and his family's choice, even if it doesn't make you happy.

 

(By the way, the scout I know who didn't want an ECOH, asked simply to be recognized along with his peers at a regular COH. I think he was mentally "done" with scouts some time before this and we seldom see him these days as his busy life has taken him off in other directions. Knowing that, I suspect he'd have been profoundly uncomfortable as the protracted center of attention at a special COH all about him.)

[Beavah]

Yah, I'm always a bit surprised by units that make the boys and parents host the Eagle COH. Seems a lot like the high school making the parents host the graduation.

 

Eagle Scout is our award, that we bestow on a lad. The boy and the parents should be our guests of honor, not our hosts.

 

So me, I would wonder a bit about da troop. Why didn't they arrange an event to present the award to the lad? Don't they care about him, or the example his earnin' the award sets for other boys?

 

Now, if da troop is an Eagle-and-out program, then I reckon the issue isn't the COH, it's "why is it an Eagle-and-out program?" What can be done to improve that?

 

Beavah

 

[hotdesk]

Our troop has the Eagle's family plan the Court of Honor. We will help with anything they want us to. We will do anything from sitting down with the family and organizing it to simply being there at the Court of Honor.

 

The reason we do this is not because we don't care about the new Eagle Scout, but that we want the family to have their say in their special day. We want them to invite those that made a difference in their son's life. We want past teachers, extended family members, former Cub Scout Leaders, employers, etc there. We also want the family to feel comfortable planning a ceremony and date that suits them. This has led to many different and exciting Court of Honors simply because one or two troop leaders weren't consistently planning them.

 

The Eagle Court of Honor is a lot more than just celebrating a young men's achievements in scouting, it is about celebrating a new turning point in his life. A turning point that brings new responsiblities and obligations. Letting the family plan this for him allows their to be that unique taste that will mean a lot to that specific scout.

[packsaddle]

I agree with Ed. OK, now you can all pick youselves up off the floor.

 

Beavah, I'd agree with your analogy to high school graduation. But I'm just not sure anyone is making parents and family host the eagle COH, around here the families seem to WANT to do it. The troop is ready and willing to do it if that's what the boy wants but in the past the families have asked to be allowed to take the lead. And we certainly aren't going to deny that request. So it could just be a matter of perception. Or maybe things are different somewhere else.

[GernBlansten]

Our unit leaves it up to the family to plan the ECOH. If they want the troop to do it, thats fine but it will be just part of our standard quarterly COH. Never had one claim he didn't want one at all, but about half of our Eagles just include it with our regular COHs.

[OldGreyEagle]

One comment frequently heard about the forum is how nobody wants to have "cookie cutter" scouts, or "Cookie Cutter" troop programs. There seems to be an adverse reaction to anything that implies uniformity (like the uniform?) So, now, into this rather Libertarian mix ( not like that is a bad thing) we want to inject the Troop planning the Eagle Court of Honor for each scout. The path to Eagle requires 21 merit badges of which 12 are required from a list of 15. The scout gets to choose 9 merit badges to earn as electives from approximately 110 (once you subtract the required ones). In theory you could have 12 scouts earn Eagle and each have 9 different elective merit badges from the other 11. Why in the name of diversity would we have the Troop run a Court of Honor for all of them?

 

Then again, if its the troop tradtion to do so, then they should do it. Eagle Courts of Honor don't have near the rules often associated with them. However it's done is fine

[scoutldr]

Our first Eagle was a no-show for his EBOR. He claimed it was a communication error. We scheduled a second one, which he passed. Never heard from him again, despite numerous e-mails and phone calls. We still have his medal and will just hold on to it until he decides he wants it. He never was real motivated...I think he just finished it to shut his parents up. We explained the COH procedure and offered to do whatever he and his parents wanted...a troop COH, or they could do their own thing. No response.

[OneHour]

... it could also be the fact that: 1) they are waiting for all congratulatory letters to come in, 2) preparing the scrapt book(s), 3) figuring out the best time to get all relatives, friends, and scouts together, 4) does not know that the family gets to plan the CoH, or 5) having nothing to do with the glamour of an Eagle CoH.

 

If 5 is the case, then a simple recognition at the Troop meeting is a nice thing to do. Either way, the SM should ping the family on the CoH.

[hot_foot_eagle]

The troop I grew up in had ECOH's as the culmination of the regular COH. We had a set program which was customized somewhat for each scout's needs. I never knew ECOH's were handled any other way until I became an adult.

 

I had my EBOR the day before I went off to college (6 months shy of my 18th birthday). I think even then that I realized the Eagle was about the journey and not the milestone. I had new mountains to climb with college and the Army. I have more regret about not having the ECOH now than when I was a boy - this coming from someone who would have skipped HS and college graduation and did skip graduation for my second undergrad degree and for grad. school with no regrets.

[red feather]

The troop that I serve usually has ECOHs planned by the family and the Eagle. We had one that did not plan his ECOH for 3 yrs and we contacted the family around Christmas one year and they gave him his Eagle packet as a present. Was told that it went over very well. Regardless of a ECOH or not the Eagle gets presented some way.

 

yis

[anarchist]

Joni$TA,

 

I wouldn't think a thing of it...not my business...or yours, frankly. The Eagle is not a "troop rank or award" it is the scouts award...first and formost. (though something could be said about all the folks who helped him get there...). Make the offer and move on.

 

Our troop will provide the site and set up/ take down labor, and we pay for beverages and a large sheet cake but the real size, shape, and timing of the event is left to the Eagle and his family. Many times it is delayed so important relatives and guests can make the trip...It is the boys party and he can do what he wants...within reason.

 

On a personal note My version of SWMBO'ed was somewhat hurt when our oldest decided he didn't want an ECoH. He wrote a few letters to Scouters who had helped him along thanking them for their help and that was that...

 

When I asked him about the lack of an ECoH, his first answer was; "I did it to prove I could do it". Then(somewhat later) I asked him again (SM was really wanting an ECoH for him)...my oldest boy thought for a few seconds and said simply, "dad, I was proud to finish the Program but I did not earn an "Eagle" for a medal or a certificate. I worked at it to prove to myself that I could do "the thing"...the prize is in the trip getting there...not a badge at the end."

 

I had not understood when the Committee Chair had commented that "this boy" seemed to have the best grasp on the meaning of being an Eagle of any scout he had ever sat EBoR for...

Guess he got the blarney from his Mother...she's the Irish one in the family....

 

P.S. my boy got scarce at meetings also...but he turned 18 a week after his EBoR and college (and a new phase of life) became more important...

chin up...life is short

Anarchist

[MarkS]

To be honest, I'm not sure that our troop has a policy on ECOHs. Since my son joined two years ago, there's been only one and the family of the scout (which includes the SM) planned it and had it at their church. It was very nice but the only boy from the troop that showed up besides the boys from his patrol (half of whom were performing his four winds ceremony) was my son. None of the younger boys in the regular patrols or NSP saw the ceremony. That was a bit dissappointing.

 

We're going to attend our next ECOH next week. That ECOH will begin folloing our regular COH. Hopefully, more of the younger boys will attend. However, I'm not sure any of the younger boys will even know him. The last time the new Eagle attended a troop activity was Summer Camp in 2006! Since then, he's only been involved in O/A and working on his Eagle. He earned Eagle just before he turned 18 and graduates high school in a couple months.