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MYCVAStory

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Everything posted by MYCVAStory

  1. I'm catching up but I noticed that you posted that comment and then photos of Scouts and adults. I'm also assuming that these are not all your family. If that's the case I believe they should be removed from this forum. Unless releases were signed or there was express consent that photos taken during a Scouting event would be shared with a larger audience I suspect those pictured and their parents believed this was for private and not public use. If It was my child I'd ask that you use photos he wasn't in to make your case. All of that said, I hope you will be as aggressive as you believe is warranted in addressing your YP concerns. When it comes to youth safety, mental or physical, there's no excuse not to be zealous.
  2. Short answer: Apparently not. Long answer: I haven't seen this in writing but that shouldn't be taken to mean that it isn't important or could be part of new YP measures. I think all parties (TCC and SWG) were focused on creating a structural mechanism for ongoing evaluation and changes. This was the right tact to take. If the non-monetary demands were too granular then there would have been an excellent chance that any "laundry list" would have had omissions AND not able to address needed changes in the future. So, the non-monetary agreements are for a YP Executive and Youth Protection Committee along with a third-party entity that will ALL be responsible for YP evaluation and changes now AND in the future. Can a non-retaliation policy be put in place then if it's brought to the attention of the YPE and YPC? Absolutely.
  3. She has a lot of work to do because confirmation of portions are typically appealed more than rejections. If she has issues with confirmation and must reject portions that becomes the BSA's problem to clean up. If she confirms portions and say the insurers appeal then she needs to have her case law locked down. Given the complexity of this and the historic nature and scope it should take a long time. Something else to consider. Judges ARE aware of news cycles. A long Memorial Day weekend coming up? The Friday before makes for a nice opportunity for s ruling when the press and others are preoccupied with days off. Also, she does NOT have to schedule a court date to announce or read her decision. Some judges like this and in Purdue Pharma Judge Drain read his decision for OVER two hours! But, she can just post it to the docket at any moment of she wants! Lastly, she can call in some parties to suggest her direction and see if they can cure a conflict prior to the final ruling. But at this date, unless it''s happened and we don't know, it's probably past that. It's coming....keep an eye on the docket and after we have the ruling don't fall for the spin. There very well may be winners and losers so the first spin ANY group puts on this is theirs alone.
  4. Perhaps that's the most important lesson. There is no formula, no system or predictability. Our own individual treatments are as individual and varied as we are. So too will be the solution for Scouting. No rule or rules. No edict or pronouncement. A whole host of measures and actions and nothing short of cultural change and perseverance from to top to the bottom of the organization informed now and forever by what happened and reminders of it so no one ever forgets and as the ways that abusers change an ever-present philosophy of tirelessness to predict and react and stop it.
  5. An important issue. It is considered part of the human reaction to trauma. Think of it as part of the "fight or flight mechanism." Something so awfully traumatic is buried so that the mind doesn't have to deal with it again and the resulting impacts. Another way to look at it is not the lack of emotional strength but the absolute strength to keep it inside where the victim has some degree of perceived control over it. What we see then, over time, are the coming together of many factors that "allow" the abuse to be shared. For many that's just plain losing the desire or ability to hold it inside for so long because of essentially being too tired to do so. That may also be coupled with a place in life where it's perceived as "safer" to share. When you consider that for many men they don't share their abuse until well into middle-age when their life is more solidified it makes sense. It also explains why the bankruptcy was SO painful for many. They knew they had to come forward but they were NOT ready to share, but they did. For others, they decided not to file a claim and now face a lifetime of second-guessing. Oh, and for those who did come forward, and had to tell others, they too might wish they hadn't when any award is insignificant. I had to tell my family after decades of keeping it secret. I still have days, many, when I wonder if maybe I shouldn't have. But then, I remember how hard it got to live that lie that nothing had ever happened.
  6. I should have quoted better originally. Johnsuch said "I know for a fact that survivor members of the YPT committee read these posts and some ideas may be brought forward for incorporation. " I'm not clear what Committee that's supposed to be unless one has been formed, prior to any confirmation ruling, and the BSA hasn't communicated that. I'm looking forward to a TCC Town Hall after a ruling and getting a sense of "what now?!"
  7. Which committee is this? The one that was a part of the non-monetary demands of the settlement has not been created. Of course. But as the old saying goes, "The unaimed arrow never misses."
  8. I'd suggest that has already been the prevailing opinion with parents. And here we are.
  9. I'd like to frame this discussion in a different way. A lot of it is focused on the past of course. The future can be seen as binary; it will get better or it won't. For those who believe it will get better, and I know you hope in your heart it does, I'd like you to address the degree that "better" is good enough. If the current plan goes through the reported YP violations will be known publicly. There will be reporting for anyone interested on a troop-lvelel for the preceding two years. The details are to be worked out but clearly we will have a MUCH better understanding of any REPORTED abuse at the most serious levels. Given that, and given that we know victims will NOT report right away, if you are so convinced that Scouting need survive I'd like you to address the point where you believe it, or some part of it, should cease to exist because it CANNOT keep children safe. What is that number or frequency? What level of abuse? Under what circumstances in the future can the BSA say "We have proven that we can keep children safe?" What is satisfactory? I don't ask these questions as someone who is supporting the destruction r continuance of the BSA. It's an exercise to focus on the FUTURE. What say you? What's your "good enough?"
  10. So just so I understand your view, the BSA HAD decades of knowledge that abuse WAS occuring, but because they didn't know Abuser X was going to cause abuse then the BSA has no fault in all of this? So much for logic.
  11. If I wasn't going to be thrown off this forum I'd say this in a MUCH different manner. But instead, please remember that for any Survivor telling his/her story your terminology is an insult beyond words.
  12. Just sharing. I have no connection: https://tribecafilm.com/films/leave-no-trace-2022
  13. I believe the intent is confirmed abuse cases only. This is consistent with privacy laws and why employers only report dates of employment and not cause of termination.
  14. This interests me. Given that Scouting has built-in overnight experiences central to its operation, and was until recently essentially solely male, how would predators have had a "much easier time?" I'm reminded of Willie Sutton when asked why he robbed banks; "Because that's where they keep the money." So where would the predators have gone where their horrors would have been "easier" to commit?
  15. A critical change is for troop parents to be informed when there was a YP breach in their troop and prospective ones knowing report frequency for past two years. Details to be worked out. No one has suggested impinging on privacy or due process to the best of my knowledge. Michael Johnson reported that HIS reviews of YP reports showed that 50% were youth-on-youth. THAT was a surprise and must change how we think. We all do. In the meantime, we are getting it from the person who was at the center of the reporting. By his account, trying to enact change. When that didn't happen he grew frustrated and left AND, AND THIS IS IMPORTANT, said that he did NOT take a payout to sign an NDA.
  16. That's your opinion and I understand it. As well, I understand the opposing opinion. Both have their sound reasoning. But, when you are calling for "truth and context" and asking that the abuse reported by 82,500 claimants (truth until it is not) include reminders of the total number that have been in scouting or some other context you feel is important then it is reasonable to ask for that context you believe is fair so our own opinions are informed. I'll only add this, a single case of abuse might not seem like a big deal "in context" until it happens to you, or your child. Finding out that was a pattern over decades, hidden by those who could have prevented it and change occuring only as a result of bankruptcy, well, for those on the fence it is logical that they are reserving judgement on the continuance of the BSA until it proves that it deserves it.
  17. Okay, so please provide the context that will help some people come around to supporting the BSA's continuance. I'm not calling for its termination, or encouraging its continuance. Being a Survivor for decades whle your abuser walks free means getting pretty good at accepting to some extent things you have no control over. But, I'm interested in understanding better the context that will help those who don't agree with you come around to the thinking that "in context" the abuse was what, not so bad? Acceptable? Better than other organizations?
  18. Survivors know this well and I hope others appreciate it. ALL those "triggers" that hit out of nowhere. Sitting in a movie theater holding your wife's hand when the trailer for "Spotlight" comes on and she asks why you're squeezing so hard and sweating. The room spinning when Facebook suggests you should send a friend request to your abuser. The jokes others make when they have no idea of your past. Every day is a new opportunity to be triggered and why so many Survivors gt to middle-age and said to themselves "I just can't do this anymore" and why we all want to scream at the top of our lungs at people who ask why we finally decided to come forward, as if it was our choice.
  19. Ahhhh....great idea....let's keep "giving context" to the abuse so it will make it seem much less devastating than it was to those of us abused. Just so we're all clear, please remind us what percentage is the over/under line for when the abuse rate doesn't seem so bad. Sarcasm mode off now. The abuse, whether you believe the number of claimants or not, is more than a total number. It was a number over time and the BSA knew it had a problem. For those of us abused while files were kept, and refused payoffs to drop our suits and go away, "context" is irrelevant. At some point a Trust may be validating claims. Then there will be a better understanding of the abuse but there is no reason to believe it will not be significant and historic in its scope. Then, the BSA will be able to better make its case every year that compared to the past it has improved. Not yet though.
  20. It's critical to remember with the non-monetery agreements related to YP that they do not consititute a laundry list of changes intended to cure all ills. Instead, they are intended to change the culture via structural changes. Hiring a YP Exec, engaging an outside third-party for compliance and assessment, and developing a critically-important Youth Protection Committee that is 50% Survivors will ensure on-going assessment and change. As well, opportunity for reporting to LCs AND most importantly current and interested scouter parents aids in transparency. Changes were needed and assuredly more will be needed. What the BSA needs is structural and cultural changes over time and with knowledge of the public. This is the first step.
  21. I deal in facts. It's probably worth noting that over 2,200 claims from abuse over the past 20 years were filed in the bankruptcy. While "small" in comparison to the total number of claims it is important to understand that for the majority of Survivors their abuse is never confronted and reported (if at all) until well into middle-age. This makes it entirely possible that the numbers for the past 20 years may be much higher. Had the bankruptcy occurred in 1980 you would NOT have seen the spike in the late 70's because very few Survivors would have been willing to come forward at that time if they were in their teens or 20's. As well, I encourage you to look deeply into the claim that the BSA has a lower incidence of abuse, including sports, and provide the facts to support that claim. Claim data related to this bankruptcy are found on the TCC's website.
  22. Santayana said "Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it." I suspect a large portion of the 82,500 Survivors disagree with you and want every piece of what happened to them known and remembered. In so doing we have the best chance of seeing that it isn't repeated. If the BSA can't withstand now the mistakes of the past decades then it has brought that upon itself and Society TODAY is going to be the the judge of that.
  23. It has not. Netflix has contracted another production company not mentioned here to produce a documentary. Delivery date as I understand is January 1. Netflix has been VERY active in covering abuse-related stories. Besides their coverage of the USA Gymnastics horrors they recently released a documentary on Jimmy Saville. If you haven't seen it I recommend it. It is a textbook example of how our institutions turn a blind eye and fail those in the shadows. As well, Netflix has created a website: https://www.wannatalkaboutit.com/sexual-violence/ The reality is that no one was going to dive too deeply into the BSA story until there was some degree of resolution. With the bankruptcy coming to some sort of end it allows stories to have finality of some sort even if not for Survivors. We live in a time when streaming services are HUNGRY for content. I have heard of three pieces now in production and I have no doubt there will be many more. Bankruptcy was the loud explosion that drew a lot of attention and made many question their children's participation. Streaming media coverage will be the echo that will repeat several times over.
  24. Don't expect an update anytime soon. There's a "status Conference" Friday because sometimes there are agreements that need finalizing or language changed. But don't expect anything significant. Instead, it should take 2-3 weeks for the Judge to have a decision ready. She'll then give a day or two notice. Enjoy the quiet.....for now!
  25. It's factoredin to their financial projections if all goes according to plan including the review. They said they wanted to be out by June but no debtor ever says the latest month in reality. If it all falls apart, if the Judge says "Sorry, I can't confirm any of this..." well, that's another story. But I think most observing the fun over the past three weeks think that's very likely. We should wait until the court schedules the decision in a few weeks and right before make our predictions. Oh, I think someone pointed out in the last forum, status conference next week is to update the court on some crossing of T's and dotting of I's. It isn't unusual for some "tweaking" of plans to go on up until a decision. Just don't get excited to think she'll have a decision in seven days. Happy Passover, Easter/Ramadan all. At least it's good timing with the hearing concluding so we can all catch our breath a bit and maybe find a little bit of peace.
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