CA Scout Mom

One of the things my husband did with new Tiger dens (he was the pack Committee Chair) was to talk to a parent about being a den leader and explain that he'd help get the den started. So, he'd go to the first few den meetings and attend and be there for the parent leader. That can help to reassure parents b/c otherwise it's very daunting to ask a neophyte parent to start leading a program about which they probably know very little. The second thing that we've done over the past few years is to ensare them by good company, food and friendship. We happen to own an electric boat and it's really nice to take the boat out and have hors d'ouevres and wine in a beautiful setting and then they're also stuck on the boat so when we ask them, oh so casually, if they'd like to take on [x, y or z], how could they possibly say no when we've wined and dined them? OK, so this might be considered outright manipulation but the truth of the matter is that what we're really doing is establishing connections and relationships and once there is a relationship, people feel a LOT BETTER about saying yes. By using the method above, we were able to get a new Cubmaster and Pack Committee Chair! And then we made sure to mentor them for the entire year. So, maybe you don't live by a lake but you could have a backyard BBQ, go to a fun place at the beach or just a local fun restaurant. Be creative but get to know your potential leaders. If all else fails, you can, as Slow Derby Racer said, ask in a public forum so that it's hard to say no! Good luck!!!

As I mentioned in my post on the co-ed thread, it's taken me about 3 years to become comfortable with the whole Boy Scout program and this after having both my sons go through Cub Scouts! So, 5 years of Cub Scouts for Son 1 plus 3 years of Boy Scouts for Son 1 = 8 years and, might I add, husband was Pack Committee Chair and then after Son 1 was in Boy Scouts for a year or so, became Scoutmaster. I had the added benefit of talking to him about all the activities, etc. that many parents don't have. I also mentioned that I'm the Membership Chair of the troop. I've been trying to give "New Parent Orientations" and sending them PDFs or links to sites for equipment lists, merit badge counselors and all sorts of other stuff. We're in the suburbs of L.A. and all the previous posts and comments about the cubicle parents is quite often correct for our troop. There are not a lot of parents with outdoors backgrounds. So, yes, there's a major learning curve and ramp-up time involved I'd say, especially because of the lack of outdoor experience and I include myself in that category. Husband a bit more familiar with the outdoors--has always enjoyed backpacking, fishing, etc. and has done so since college. The Boy Scout program has a lot of different facets and it's quite complex! The troop we're in had over 100 Scouts in it in the mid-90s and we're now at about 20-22 and that's only because we just added 8 new Scouts this summer from the Webelo den of which I was den leader! And, of the parents who were in the troop pre-new Scouts, most didn't participate. The bridger Webelo parents are used to helping out, thank goodness. But, that being the case, there will be a lot of training for them in the months ahead.

I'm not sure what you're saying here...are you saying that because women were accepted in the troop program as adult volunteers (both as ASMs and Committee members I'm assuming), that the quality of the program suffered? Maybe your troop has men leaping to the fore to volunteer in your troop but that's certainly not the case in our troop! Without the moms, we might not have much of a troop! We hardly have any dads who participate currently. It's the same ones who go on outings and who help at the troop meetings.. We just brought in some new Scouts from the Webelo den of which I was the den leader and we will now see many more dads participating because our Cub Scout pack has trained all the parents to participate. But, our troop committee is made up largely of the moms. Many of the parents work long hours in our area to be able to afford to live here and simply don't and can't participate as much due to their work commitments. One dad is usually gone 1-2 weeks/month because he travels to various places around the world doing risk management for one of the biggest mall developers in the US. He comes to the meetings when he can though. Many of the women volunteers, especially the ones who have run the popcorn sales, have done a bang-up job. I'm the Membership Chair/Registrar and I spend a lot of time working on recruiting and dealing with registrations. Some of the other moms are the ones who go to summer camp because dads can't take off 7 days. Also, adult volunteers need time to learn how Scouting works--it's taken me about 2-3 years to be comfortable and feel knowledgeable about the Scout program but I have absorbed it and feel qualified to be in the position I'm in. So I beg to differ with your statement that "the policy [of accepting women] has devastated the quality of the program."

There are other ways to do fundraising, of course, besides selling popcorn. Scouts could offer to do work for a local organization or have a pancake breakfast or spaghetti dinner at the location of their meetings. I think selling is a great skill for boys and in our troop, as I expect in most others, there are the "Show and Sell" opportunities in front of grocery markets, home improvement centers, etc. Since that's a group effort, that makes it more fun for the shy Scouts. But, yes, for many of our parents, myself included, have come to realize that in some situations it's going to be more efficient to make the donation. I was the adult coordinator in charge of the spaghetti dinner fundraiser last spring and in the end, donated over $250 in supplies and groceries, in order to make the fundraiser more successful. Was happy to do it but that wasn't really the point although it did raise the troop's visibility at the church where our troop meets.

I think many boys enjoy science, math and technology and as a country we should be promoting it! Our youth need to be prepared for the jobs of the future, and the jobs of today, many of which involve, yes...science, math and technology. I'd like to see more STEM-related merit badges. One of the most popular non-outdoors outings that our troop makes is to the Jet Propulsion Laboratory Open House in Pasadena. This is NOT to say, however, that Scouts don't enjoy the outdoors because they do! I just feel that there's room for both the great outdoors and STEM. And, full disclosure here--my husband owns a technology company and it is not easy to find talented help. But, Boy Scouts are reliable, trustworthy, creative, etc.--combine all that with the needed technology skills for the workforce and you've got a super-star! Just saying...

Our troop also provides free necker, handbook, epaulets, patches, slide and Class B shirt. Our Class B shirts are in dri-fit and have been really popular with the Scouts! In terms of other give-aways, our troop does a rocket launch in the early Spring and all rockets and materials (not kits, the real things, incl. motors!) are free to any Webelos who attend. It's always a blast (haha!) and a good recruiting event without every being stated as such.

I guess your son's troop has plenty of members and plenty of adult leaders? I wish that was the case with my son's troop! My husband is the new Scoutmaster and he would love to have more parental participation even though his focus is on having a boy-led troop. He's working on getting more parent participation with the method he used when he was Committee Chair of the Cub Scout pack which was ultimately successful. (See my long post on Parental Participation post!) I find it highly suspicious that any troop wouldn't appreciate more help so that's a red flag right there. And, you might want to consider whether these strong personalities might be leaving soon if their boys are older. So, can you wait it out, in other words? But, either way, I encourage you to find a way participate to help keep the bonds with your son and the troop strong and healthy. And, it needn't be on the SM/ASM side but on the Committee side depending on where these strong personalities tend to gravitate.

When we first joined the Cub Scout pack when my oldest son was a Tiger about 8 years ago (about your same time frame), that same situation was going on--hardly any parent participation and the CubMaster was also the Committee Chair and very low membership. Then, my husband took over as Committee Chair about 2 years in and decided that every parent needed to participate and laid down those expectations whenever anyone joined, at every pack meeting and event and at leaders' meetings. The message started to permeate and the pack is now healthy and parents participate but it takes time for this to happen. Just this summer our youngest son has just bridged over to the associated troop. Just like with the Cub Scout pack, when we joined the troop, the troop had one person doing most of the work with just a few parents to help him. The troop had about 10 kids about to age out and just a few other older Scouts when my oldest son joined as a 5th grader so it was not in a good place in terms of membership numbers. They hadn't been recruiting so it was very small in number. After a year or so, my husband became the Scoutmaster (they only had an interim one in place when we joined) and he's now implementing the same philosophy about parental participation that he had with the Cub Scout pack. It's difficult because the parents who've been involved in the past and aren't used to participating don't like hearing the message but if parents don't participate, then burn-out happens. For the past year my husband and about 2 other ASM Dads have been the only dads who've been doing the backpacks and rock climbing and it gets to be a burden so it's become imperative that we get some more participation. Just last month he went out to one Dad in his car who was dropping off his son and talked to him about needing more help. The Dad, of course, was giving him the old "I work so much" story but that did not deter my husband--he's getting the message out one way or another! Luckily, our Webelo den from our pack is in the process of bridging over so that will add about 8 new Scouts to the troop along with their parents who are used to participating. It's been so clear to me from seeing the effectiveness of the message work in the Cub Scout pack that getting the message out is paramount. So, my suggestion would be to share the message however and wherever you can. And, yes, there will be a few losses but those families who left our Cub Scout pack way back were the type who valued sports over Scouting or who often had nannies who took care of their kids so was better actually that they left since they saw the BSA as "Babysitters of America". It will take some work but better to recruit the ones who understand what is required rather than recruit the ones who won't be contributing. I'm the Membership Chair and feel comfortable sharing this message, of course! Stay strong, deliver the expectations, be patient, and things will improve!