tessnjohn1

I sincerely appreciate all of your help, everyone. I had to go to council to get all the materials I needed, but I have them now. I did not have contact info for the COR,CO, DE... any of the den leaders, scouts, or their parents. The CC had told me that I would not, in my position, need the roster... and if I should happen to need to contact someone as the CC, I would have to ask the CM for the contact info, and explain why I needed it. Buckeye Council helped me to realize that that was TOTALLY NOT the case! In short, I had been bullied into believing I had to go to the CM for everything. I have contacted our DE, and am scheduling a meeting with him, our COR, and parties involved to work out the Bear Den Leader situation. I hope, for the sake of the boys in our pack, that we can manage to smooth everything out. The only information I was given about my position was the online training I received. While it provides a LOT of information, it does not give me a list of materials I should have (roster, contact info for the COR, ect.) nor did it give me the knowledge of who CAN and CAN NOT eliminate leadership positions and how. I know I seemed like a very weak CC when I allowed to be done what was done. That was not my intent. I DID try to run the meeting. I DID try to stop the CM from making a public drama about our BDL in front of our scout parents. I DID try to set up our committee. When I tried to bring the meeting to order, the CM took over "first business" and talked over me with the BDL situation. When I tried to stop him, he ignored me, and raised his voice to drown me out. He told everyone that he had be to council on Thursday, and council gave him the authority to do what he was doing. (When I went to council yesterday, I was informed by the Director of Field Service that the CM and ACM had NOT been there last week, NOR have they ever given permission for the CM to do what he did.) So, I figured I would keep quiet and allow him to make a fool of himself. (I just knew something was wrong with what he was doing.) When I tried to set up our committee, the ACM (CM's wife) spoke over me, telling me and the parents that our pack was too small to have a committee... and we didn't need to have one set up so soon, because the year was "ending." YES, I allowed all of this to happen. I did so, because I was a little unsure about the CM's claim that he went to council and had permission... I also allowed this to happen because I did NOT want to seem like a Nazi. I know there is a gentle balance of power. I know that I have power, but I'm NOT about to let it go to my head. I DO realize that I allowed myself to be ran over by the CM and ACM, and I'm sorry that I let it happen. However, I was worried that if I put my foot down at the meeting, it may have drummed up more drama from the CM, or caused there to be more and BIGGER disruptions in the boy's scouting program. I'm not trying to be a dictator to the CM, or to boast my "rank" over him. I'm just trying to figure out how to handle an over zealous CM and ACM, and NOT hurt the boy's experience in this scouting program. I'm hoping my level head will prevail over this situation. I'm just SO overwhelmed by the hostile takeover. I'm surprised to find out that I don't have to go to the CM for contact info... that I should have had it in the first place. There are just so many things I have been lied to about, misinformed about by the CM or ACM, and things that are in my job description that I have not been privy to. I've tried to not be pushy about setting up the committee, but it is vital. I've tried to show them that we all want the same thing for the boys in this pack. I think the meeting with the DE and COR will straighten out what ever is left of this mess. I just hope that this will put an end to the lies, rude behavior, and high school drama. Thank you all SO much for your advice and support. It is VERY much appreciated. Blessings, Tess

I'm sorry that I did not provide enough information as to the reason behind the CM's decision to remove our Bear Den Leader. At our PWD, there was an incident concerning our Bear Den Leader, and another den leader. Our Bear Den Leader walked outside, and away from the situation, and this other guy followed him yelling at him. (I have several witnesses.) When our CM announced that he was pulling our Bear Den Leader, he said it was because "a singular scout is afraid of him." At this, I had SEVERAL parents give me the "WHAT?!?!" stair. After the "meeting" was over, all but one of the parents came to me and told me what a wonderful leader they thought our BDL was... and how they couldn't figure out what had just happened. To my knowledge, there have been no other "altercations" with our BDL, nor was there any "pull-a-side" talks with him. He is remarkable with our boys, and I have SEVERAL parents that are willing to testify to that fact. About our pack... our pack was started 7moths ago. Our CM's wife linked her pack and ours to give ours a little kick start. She said that they would be separating at the end of this month. We are still not very well established. That was the reason I called for a meeting... so we could set up our committee. We have 6 boys right now, and we're working hard to recruit more. Parent involvement is AWESOME! We even have two grandparents (Eagle Scout, and Scout for Life) involved. The meeting to set up the committee was time and date chosen by the CM and his wife. (as I said, I can't seem to get a word in edgewise.) All we have set up for the committee is the CC (myself), SEC (ACM), and TRES (ACM). The ACM has "self promoted" herself to handle all the other positions as well. That is a lot for one person, and I have so many wonderful parents that want to be involved, and are willing to help! Tonight, I was told that it was not important to set up the committee at this time, since the year is coming to a close. In my mind, it's all the more reason to get set up! Getting set up now, means that we won't be scrambling around, rushing the boys, and being unorganized. The summer would give the committee time to plan the next years events. I know I can't have one person filling all the positions in the committee, as the ACM is trying to. Kind of makes it unfair to so many people in so many ways. The point is, I called for the meeting to set up our committee. The AMC (CM's Wife)chose the date and time for me, and then they (CM & ACM) walked all over the meeting. None got appointed, and everyone was upset at the end of the night because of the public display of dictatorship by the CM for calling our BDL out for nothing. (the sad thing is I had pretty much figured out who would be the best people to fill the positions needed.) There was no warning, no talking with anyone. When I got home, I contacted our BDL, to tell him how sorry I was about what happened. He says he still really wants to be the BDL, to encourage his son and the other boys in their scouting adventure. (could be because I'm pregnant, but I was almost in tears listing to the poor guy!) He admitted he had gotten frustrated at another DL (not in our pack) at the PWD, but he walked away so as to avoid an altercation in front of the boys. (again, I have witnesses.) The crazy thing is our BDL actually talked with the DL he had problems with, and the two of them smoothed it out. But... THIS happened almost 2 MONTHS ago! The three boys in the Bear Den are completely distraught! They loved their leader, and I can't blame them because he's an awesome guy!... Quick to make them laugh, always there to help, and makes the meetings a LOT of fun for the boys. He did such a great job with the wood badge. I don't know for sure if I have the power to over ride the CM on this one. The CM still hasn't told me who the COR is... HECK, I don't think we even have one yet! LOL! I just know that the boys are happy with our BDL, as are the parents of those boys. I'm thinking of sending an email to the Buckeye Council concerning this matter. From my opinion, we don't need this kind of drama/crap going on when we're trying to get this new pack up and running well. And since I don't know who our COR is, I don't have any other place to turn to other than Council. I just want to make sure that things are handled properly, and (most importantly) the safety and happiness of the boys is at the forefront of this endeavor. I am willing to do what it takes for the boys safety and happiness. I also don't want to "tip the apple cart" if I'm not following proper protocol. I hope I explained the situation a little more clearly. Sorry I didn't get it all right the first time around. I was a little frustrated, and my fingers typed faster than my brain was turning. LOL! Thanks for your patience.

I am the Committee Chair for our Pack. I'm not ashamed to say that I'm new to this. Tonight (Tuesday, April 12th, 2011) we had our pack meeting. I had called a meeting to be held to vote people into office and structure our committee following our pack meeting. (we have in place the CC, CM, Treasurer.) However, the Cub Master and Asst. Cub Master talked over me, and did something I believe to be "jumping the chain of command." I did not get a chance to vote or speak at this meeting I called. The issue at hand is one concerning our Bear Den Leader. Our Bear Den Leader is commendable with exemplary involvement with the boys in our scout family. He has gone above and beyond the "call of duty" when it comes to the needs of our boys, and their families. Our pack just recently had a tragic loss. Our Webelos Den Leader lost her baby at 37 weeks pregnant. He not only encouraged our pack to help her, but also volunteered a LOT of personal time to her and her family. During her leave of absence, due to her loss, our Bear Den Leader stepped up to help our Webelos Den. The only mark agents him is that there is some friction between him, and the Wolf Den Leader. At the very opening of tonight's meeting, the Cub Master addressed all the parents (who are not part of the committee)for their attention, and asked our Bear Den Leader to step down, or be forcibly removed. None of this was discussed with me, nor was there a meeting called with the Charter Committee and myself about this. There was no vote, even among current existing committee members and/or the other Den Leaders and parents. When the CM closed the meeting, he and his wife told me that there was no reason to vote on committee members, because we didn't have enough people to fill the positions, and it's the end of the year. We had 8 parents that came specifically to fill positions needed, and only 2 positions that actually needed to be filled! I hope you can guide me, as Committee Chair, on how to handle this situation. There are a few other concerns I have, as well. Our ACM is our treasurer, self proclaimed secretary, the CM of a different pack, and wife to our pack's CM. Is this allowed? I'm so confused! It just seems to me that the meeting I called tonight was ran by the CM and his wife, and turned into a three-ring circus! What can I do?