packwife

Thanks for all the advice. We have talked about everything with our son and by chance, he is in a group at school that meets on his scout night for the rest of the school year. He's decided that he'd like to find another troop that meets on a different night so he can make Eagle.Then he said that he'd been wanting to for a least a year now but didn't know how to tell us because we are friends with most of the adults. Kids.... sometimes they are smarter than we give them credit for.

The sm is a military officer so I'm sure you can guess how meetings are run. He treats the boys like his "troops" or people who work under him. He just seems to blow at the drop of a hat and I did notice some of the boys were worried by his reaction to this other scout.

Hi All, You all may remember that my son was the one who dropped the "f" bomb at camp this past summer. He never did get a scoutmaster conference. He decided to stay with his current troop over my uneasy feelings about it. Anyway, the following happened to another child this week: Boys had their meeting this week and were going over skills needed for Klondike derby in their patrols. This meeting was on fire building. One scout left his fire burning materials in the hall and ran back to get them. During this time the rules of competition were explained. Scout comes back and breaks one of the rules. The scout says he didn't hear the rules and SM went on a rant about when and where SM explained the rules. Scout says well, he still didn't hear the rules, didn't SM know not all of the troop was there at the time? SM kicks over his fire and the patrol loses competiton. I felt this could have been handled differently. The boy is 14 and in a mouthy stage of life. What is SM going to do when the next 14 year old boy gets mouthy too? I am almost afraid to leave my son there now. Husband says son should switch troops now no matter what son wants. Thoughts????

Sorry SR540Beaver, I was asking about how bad the offense had to be to get a scout suspended. It kind of snowballed back into the earlier thread I started. He has not been suspended, but I am fearing this action. Beavah, he dropped the f word with a boy who then continued to harrass him through the whole week. Teasing more than harrassing but you know the type; keep messing with the boy who shows the most reaction. Thanks everyone. I think I'm going to see what takes place when the meetings start again in September.

Yes, my chld used the f word and it was taken care of at camp, so I thought. The SM goes on to tell me about a few other incidents at camp. So being the mom I am, I had a discussion with my son about his behavior. During which, I find out that SM didn't quite tell the whole story. I did more questioning of other boys in his patrol, all of whom were involved in these offenses, and found out the rest of the story. It was a game they were in; a hunt. This patrol took a different approach to the hunt and it was over before the patrol finished. They went back to camp and were yelled at for quitting. My son spoke up and said they didn't quit, whould he like to see everything they collected? No was the answer, however a punishment resulted. They were also told that merit badges take priority. This patrol a couple of partials they were trying to finsih before the last day and didn't do well on a bunk inspection. Punished again although they were following what they were supposed to do. Personally, I think everyone involved was having a bad week, but the adults don't want to seem to admit any wrongs. My son was threatened with "Its a good thing your not my child or you wouldn't be able to sit down." How is that helping any situation? Ok, I feel like I'm starting to rant. I think if any meeting happens it should be one with me, my husband, and son, and see if any one agrees that missteps happened on both sides before they loose a good scout and he looses having a good experience with scouting.

How bad of an offense does a scout have to commit to get suspended? Is it what the SM or ASM sees as bad or are there guidelines for offenses? Is a scout allowed a few chances first or is it one screw up and SM thinks its bad and out he goes? What if the parents think it wasn't as bad and the SM thinks it was, does a parent have any say?

CalicoPenn, He's been wanting to find a new troop for a little while. I think he's just using the awful time at camp to make the jump. His troop has really gone downhill in the last 2 years or so. They just aren't as active as they used to be and he's getting frustrated. The SM is AWOL most of the time and meetings are just about social hour for the boys now. So maybe this is a good thing in disguise. I was just hoping him leaving wouldn't have to be over having a bad week at camp.

I did wonder why the SM didn't realize this is not normal behavior from my "Johnny" and take him aside and discuss this with him. The older boy whom the comment was directed at isn't even in the same patrol as my son. Older boy does like to get things stirred up between the boys but acts innocent when leaders come around. As all of this was addressed at camp and I made my son email the SM, apologize, and promise to never act this way again. I just don't see what the point is to rehash it again in a month. Thanks to everyone.

This is not a habitual problem. THis is his 5th year at camp and the first time he's ever been a problem at camp or just camping. He was wrong, he admitted it, was punished at camp and is now being punished at home for his behavior. Why does more action need to be taken when meetings start again in September when the offense occurred a month earlier? How much more of a beat down do I let my chile endure? He's ready to quit scouts all together because of this week, his bullying from the older boy, and the leaders not listening to him. He is a Life Scout and a Brotherhood OA member.

Ok, I think I may have gotten off the point a little. I know he swore and used the worst swear word probably ever, and was punished for it at camp. He talked with ASM there and apologized to the boy and ASM. His troop will now not meet again until September where the ASM, who heard him, 2 other ASM's, who didn't, and SM who wasn't there will want to have a sit down meeting in Class A uniform. I just don't understand why there needs to be more action on this.

I didn't think SM or ASM's needed to be detectives I just thought they needed to be fair. If they were only hearing one side they don't have all the info they need to make a fair decision. He was never asked his side of the story the whole week. I do agree with you about his lack of credibility he seemed to have aquired after the incident. But why does that need to happen? He did apologize to the ASM and the boy after the offending words. Couldn't this have been a good lesson for all of them to learn that it's possible to mess up, own up, and be forgiven?

Ok, boys just went to summer camp. I get to parents day and the whole troop tells me that SM is looking for me. Apparently, my son had an issue and after being razzed about it from one of the older boys, told older boy to "shut the f### up". ASM heard him and had a stern discussion with son and was told if he was his kid he wouldn't be able to sit down. He got mad at my 14 yr old because he gave the vacant teen stare to ASM during the stern discussion that I get at home. Older scout knows my son is having trouble this week and just keep on son all week. SM keep threatening to send my son home with me all week but never said that to the other boy. I'm not turning a blind eye to my sons behavior, but I feel like he was singled out this week and the adults who were in charge of my son's care for the week let him down by not asking for both sides of the story. Now, SM says he and other SM's and ASM"s want to have a sit down with my son when meetings start again(they break until school starts again) to talk about his behavior. Wasn't that taken care of at camp? I feel like saying enough already and when is it appropriate for me to step in and say so? I should mention that older boy is SM son's best friend.

Can someone explain to me the reasoning behind having all the older, higher ranking scouts in one patrol? In your explaination, can you explain how putting all new WebeloII's in one patrol together with no older scouts? Is this the way other troops set up their patrols too? Its been bothering me for a while now and yes I did mention it to the SM that maybe the older scouts would attend the meetings more frequently if they could get more involved with the teaching.Yes I am on the committee and have brought it up there too. Our SM gets extremely angry when we try to bring up new things. Thanks

Maybe you should call some reporters out. Seems like when the press gets involved things get moving. I sure wouldn't want to move into a community whose patriotism seems to be in question. Bad press couldn't be good for business.

My next question is what happens when a parent doesn't like one of the "bylaws"? Do we make an exception for that one parent or tell them to find another troop? Hopefully, when we get together for the next meeting and I mention this fact, they will reconsider about 8 pages of the bylaws.