Helicopter parenting is damaging kids

[Krampus 696]

@@DuctTape what they have developed in its place has been argumentative skills. Parents complain about everything and the kids pick it up. Over the last 10-15 years of refereeing youth sports I have seen more and more how parents' attitudes toward winning, officials, coaches, each other, etc., has trickled down to the kids.

 

Just picked up my scout from refereeing a youth sports event. One coach laid in to two players (U9) at half time in front of everyone. His entire bench then laid in to the other team and the referees during the game. Forget that they were down 0-7 and could not retain the ball unless the other team left the field. This team was intent on blaming their incompetence on everyone other than themselves and their coach.

 

Hire a 20-something these days. You will see the same attitude.

[Stosh 3452]

Our culture has become Intolerance Running Rampant.  Self-Righteous Indignation is coming as a close second and the Golden Rule is the distant last place.  I used to call it our society, but that implies a modicum of community.  That dynamic hasn't been around for many years.  People used to be concerned that they lived in a neighborhood where they didn't know anyone.  Now they just don't care.  Wave or say "Hi" to someone and immediately they become suspicious.  The scary part is that the transformation isn't complete yet.

[SSScout 1615]

"Zealous Parenting , and its Fallout"  /Emma Brown,  Washington Post, Monday 19 October 2015

 

"Julie Lython-Halms noticed a disturbing trend during her decade as a dean of freshmen at Stanford University. Incoming students were brilliant and accomplished and virtually flawless , on paper. But with each year, more of them seemed incapable of taking care of themselves."

 

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/former-stanford-dean-explains-why-helicopter-parenting-is-ruining-a-generation-of-children/ar-AAfyij9

 

"MOMMY!  That professor won't PASS me !!"

[Krampus 696]

"Zealous Parenting , and its Fallout"  /Emma Brown,  Washington Post, Monday 19 October 2015

 

"Julie Lython-Halms noticed a disturbing trend during her decade as a dean of freshmen at Stanford University. Incoming students were brilliant and accomplished and virtually flawless , on paper. But with each year, more of them seemed incapable of taking care of themselves."

 

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/former-stanford-dean-explains-why-helicopter-parenting-is-ruining-a-generation-of-children/ar-AAfyij9

 

"MOMMY!  That professor won't PASS me !!"

 

I find the irony that this is coming from a Stanford dean --  given the political leaning of that campus, city, state -- delicious!

 

You can't complain about the problem when you are part of the infrastructure enabling it, Ms. Halms..

[Stosh 3452]

Maybe someday these people will realize that the phrase, "Well, it sounded like a good idea at the time." isn't reserved for the back woods hillbillys, it can easily apply to the hillbillys of  the halls of academia as well.

[DuctTape 1230]

I find the irony that this is coming from a Stanford dean --  given the political leaning of that campus, city, state -- delicious!

 

You can't complain about the problem when you are part of the infrastructure enabling it, Ms. Halms..

The issue is not partisan. It is parental, on both the left and right.

[Krampus 696]

The issue is not partisan. It is parental, on both the left and right.

 

The commentary comes from a dean of a very liberal school, in a very liberal city, in a very liberal state. It comes from quarters known for pushing an agenda that blames others for the individual's mistakes; therefore, the complaint is ironic.

 

I didn't say it was a partisan issue. I simply said that its ironic a dean from a liberal school, city and state that promotes this sort of self-indulgence is finally seeing the light.

Edited October 21, 2015 by Krampus

[DuctTape 1230]

But again you are ascribing "this self indulgence" to those who lean liberal. I am stating that this is not unique to one side or the other. Your description of the liberal agenda shows your bias, so I understand. I just happen to disagree. I see it on both sides.

[Horizon 97]

The commentary comes from a dean of a very liberal school, in a very liberal city, in a very liberal state. It comes from quarters known for pushing an agenda that blames others for the individual's mistakes; therefore, the complaint is ironic.

 

I didn't say it was a partisan issue. I simply said that its ironic a dean from a liberal school, city and state that promotes this sort of self-indulgence is finally seeing the light.

Palo Alto is not that liberal (more rich, and tech than liberal). Yes, there is a Democrat in Congress who took over when a Republican stepped down to run for Senate - but she still only takes the seat with around a 60/40 split each cycle I believe.

 

Stanford is the home to Hoover, Milton Friedman (plus Boskin and Taylor in econ), Condi Rice in Poli Sci, and several others. Their social sciences are as liberal as any other university, but they don't stand out in that measurement. The student body is more interested in the next start-up (Yahoo, Google, Snapchat from the frat boys, etc.) than protesting. There is still a Greek presence, a football team, and a drunken band that is regularly banned.

 

Now - the real laughter is the Dean of Freshman talking about this, when much of the helicoptering is due to the insistence of schools to only admit perfect candidates. When those are the admissions criteria to even be considered, it is tough to NOT end up with hovering parents making sure zero missteps are taken.

 

Personally, I have shared this book with the parents of our Troop - telling them that part of our goal is help the boys mature to not be as brittle. Sadly, the ones who need it the most are the ones who drop out.